My Dad had a stroke in March. Recovering well and wants to drive again. Failed Fit to Drive test in NJ. Moved to FL, wants me to not tell.

Call the Florida DMV, explain, and tell them that he HAS TO take the test. And then DMV will tell them they called (whatever state he lived in) DMV, and they told new state about failing, and so he HAS TO take the test (and pass). I'm sure they'd ask for his old driver's license as record anyway. Good luck...and thank you for getting him off the road!

Don’t help him drive if you know he failed the test, don’t put yourself at ANY risk of lawsuit , especially if you knew he was unfit. You never know what stupid laws are out there that would hold you liable.

Unfortunately this may end up more work for you.

Good luck

Get a local Doctor to reevaluate and if he doesn't pass have the Doc give the bad news so he doesn't resent you

Communications between DMV in different states is supposed to be automatic, BUT don't rely on that.
When you contact FLA DMV, get the name and address and title of the person you speak with. Write it down. Then send them a written letter with signature required for delivery, so that you have documentation of your action. That protects you, I think.
AARP does a safe driving for seniors short class and some assessments. A place to get unbiased information for decision making.
A drivers education company might have some resources for him. I'd suggest having a trained professional assess his driving. Keeps you and your sister one step removed.
Framing this as gathering information so that you can all have an idea what is involved might help avoid escalation into open warfare. (If you have adult children, this is a teaching moment for your driving and their responsibility in a couple of decades.
Aging is like adolescence in reverse. This time, losing skills and body changes that are all losses, instead of gaining them. Driver's license is a big deal when you are 16, especially for men.
The Travelers insurance web site might have good information.
And the idea of helping him get familiar with alternate transportation sources now, maybe with you or your sister riding along with him, is great.
Good luck. This is a passage that is hard to navigate.

I would arrange for testing him behind the wheel again without telling him this time. In the meantime, you'll have to watch so that he doesn't start driving without telling you, and take him wherever he wants to go. He still shouldn't be driving. If he doesn't understand why he can't drive, then he has some form of dementia. I don't think explaining more to him will do him any good at this point.

We were in a similar situation with my mom. We learned that if a doctor does not release you and indicate that you are able to drive your insurance is considered null and void should you have an accident. My mom's doctor was the one to tell us this. Once my mom was told this she agreed to a driving eval.
I also learned from the driving evaluator that in many states anyone can make an anonymous report to the DMV voicing concerns regarding someone's ability to drive and the DMV will request that the person have a driving eval. ( this is the case in Indiana where we live) If the person fails to do so within a certain period of time their license is revoked by the DMV. It may be worth you time to check into the DMV policies/laws in Florida.
While you hate to take such steps and feel like you are sneaking around behind their backs, given the seriousness of having them on the road if they are not safe to be driving, taking these steps maybe necessary.

My answer may not be popular but :
Think hungry lawyers. If there is any accident, injury or death caused by the driver there is any number of hungry lawyers waiting to empty all your savings, and all your / his estate in a wrongful injury death suit.
Once they search all driving records and DMV records they will subpeonea his past medical and driving records to present their clients need to the jury for deliberation. If he has a failed test and a good lawyers finds it you're done. They can sue to take all he has. And may find you negligent.
Check with your family attorney asap.

My mom couldn't drive safely and ran into another car. The officer who took the report didn't realize how bad her eyesight is so she only got a ticket.

I told my mom I wouldn't help her find a new car and I loved her enough to let her be mad at me. Yes it was hard for her to give up driving. It would be even harder if she actually killed anyone.

We helped get senior transportation through the county where she lived and a local charity offered her rides to the store and doctor appointments,

She got over being mad at me quickly because she realized that if she was rude to me, I wouldn't be around.

You can contact the DMV in Florida and explain what happened in NJ. Also make sure all of his medical providers know about it. If he tries to get an exemption from them, they will be liable for damages and won't want to have that happen. You don't have to tell him that you are doing this.

Also, doctors may not be able to tell you anything because of privacy laws, but they can listen to what you tell them.

If he asks you to help him get a car or a license, say no. If he can't do it on his own, then he isn't capable of driving either.

It will help him, if you acknowledge how difficult this is for him and that you will help him get alternate transportation.

I agree with all the replies emphasizing safety, for dad and others on the road when he is driving. Suggest to him that he can 'retire' from the hassle of driving in traffic and be 'chauffeured' now; spin it like a luxury instead of a loss of freedom.
BTW, friends, there is a service for seniors who do not use cellphones, called Go Go Grandma, that can summon any available ride company for the elder with just a landline; it's out of San Francisco, operates like a taxi service: you pay a certain (variable) amount and each ride is deducted from the rider's balance, then you 're-up' the plan; elder does not need to even worry about cost of each ride, tips, etc., as long as they have money in their 'chauffeur account'!

First of all, I would think before Florida issues any licenses, etc. they would check his past in NJ and would then not issue anything. I am not sure of that. I would contact the people in Florida - phone/person AND in writing telling them to put t his into his records. He does not need to know this. What do his doctors say? Does he have access to a car - where? Whose is it? Could a private driving instructor test him and you could get an evaluation. I can well understand the need to drive but I also see the other side. I don't know how to help. I think a doctor needs to tell him that he failed the test and he cannot drive.....period!

VeronicaB: Imho, do not be a party to his scheme of lying as there could be legal ramifications, which may come back to you. That is just one element. The other being a serious lack of being able to operate a motor vehicle. My late mother, who was a legally blind woman (she had peripheral vision) said "a car is a weapon" and gave up her DL long before it was time.

Will you feel more guilty about telling on him or about the deaths (his and others) he could very likely cause if he tries?

Tell them.

"Do drivers moving to Florida have to retake the written test again? Yes, when you move to Florida you'll need to pass the written test when you transfer your out-of-state license. While much of the information on the written test is very similar from state to state, there are some nuances you'll need to know."

Best if he can be convinced to give up license on his own. Hard thing but he had one stroke and could have another so best to pull his license before he hurts himself or another. My husband stopped driving on his own after a minor fender bender. Good luck and I sure understand. Folks need to get around and driving is the only way.

My mom with Alzheimer's lived with us. I wrote a note to her doctor, before a visit, explaining her reluctance to give up driving, even though I drove her everwhere. Her doc reinforced the fact that I was her "chauffeur" and she didn't need to drive. My mom was reluctant to even listen to the doc. Luckily, my mom's car stopped working, so that took care of the problem. I even wrote a book about Hubby and I taking care of her called, "My Mother Has Alzheimer's and My Dog Has Tapeworms: A Caregiver's Tale." I have a chapter entitled, "Car-Ma."

Before my mom got sick, she knew of people who wouldn't give up driving, and she told me she'd never endanger herself or others, by doing that, but when Alzheimer's hit, all reasoning went out the window. She could be sneaky; she'd even find the keys that I hid. Maybe you could talk to your dad's doc, and see what he or she suggests. There have been other great suggestion here as well.

Veronica, did u check the license and make sure its not an ID only? This will solve your problem if its an ID.

Update: First off, thank you for the ideas, kind words, good counsel and support. Saw the new neurologist today for my Mom. Told her I'm bringing my Dad in next and that he wants to drive. She is going to help. Thank you for helping me have the fortitude to do this. It's so hard.

As he is recovering well then as long as he starts at the beginning of the process in Florida and passes all their steps I don't see a historic failure in NJ really matters - he has to get through all stages - if he has improved and is now fit to drive he will pass, if not he will fail.

I believe he should have to take and pass a behind the wheel test in this situation and I would not hide any information that would interfere with that happening.