She thinks I take her keys, Driver license, insurance policies anything missing I have taken. Even when you find them she thinks you put it there. I am so trying to understand all this.
The STRESS is very hard to handle.
Sundowners seems to be getting worse and WOW she is so hateful and she has never been hateful always so sweet and kind. It is as if she is a completely different person.
She has thrown plates across the kitchen when she was mad.
She has just stated taking Aircept about 3 weeks ago and I swear it has changed her and not for the good.
She was up after midnight looking for something the other night and she woke us up at 2:30 wanting it back.
She took her keys outside and wrapped them in foil and placed under lawn ornament. and of course I took them - luckily she remembered and showed her son where she put them to keep me from getting them ( I am not) then she hid them somewhere else.
She hates EVERYTHING , nothing ever positive.

She wants to go to a home that is rented and is mad because she can not.
Then other days I am her favorite and she loves me and remembers I love her but those days seems to be getting further apart.

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jennegibbs She moved back in with us after only being gone 10 months. She was living at her house with her daughter and was admitted to hospital in May of 2015 for malnutrition and bleeding ulcer. She hasn't driven in months, her car is in the driveway but not able to start ( hummmm ) plus my husband has taken her car key off the ring . She hasn't noticed that yet.

Thank you for advice! I know this is not really her BUT the frustration on all levels are so stressful for us all. I love having somewhere to vent and ask for help , suggestions and great advice.

We will discuss with the doctor.
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Welcome to the paranoid and accusatory stage of dementia. Talk to the doctor about her medication. Dementia meds are not one size fits all. Sometimes even changing the dosage means strange changes in behavior.
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Jeramoran, you are describing fairly typical early-to-moderate dementia behavior. I know that doesn't make it go away, but perhaps knowing that will help you cope with a little less stress. Perhaps.

This is NOT about you. Not about your MIL's attitudes toward you. It is about the damage in MIL's brain that is very frightening for her. OMG. She can't keep track of her personal possessions. What is going on? Well, the answer is "I am losing cognitive abilities as my dementia progresses." But that is not the answer that pops into her mind. "Somebody must be taking my thinks! It must be DIL because she is here the most. Why on earth has she started being so mean to me!" is closer to what comes into her mind.

To protect herself from these losses, she hides possessions. Then she can't remember that she did that (let alone where she hid them) and that reinforces the paranoia. Vicious cycle.

People have thrown out eyeglasses in "empty" tissue boxes. They have found jewelry in the freezer. A wallet in the flour canister. Gloves in the cat litter bag. Frightened people with dementia can get real creative!

It is possible that Airicept is contributing to this, but it is very common whether the person with dementia is taking drugs or not. Any change in behaviors like this should be discussed with her doctor.

Is MIL living alone? Is she still driving?
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