Follow
Share

At this point I am willing to try anything to make her understand that she is not talking to Russell Crowe. If I could reach out to Mr. Crowe or his manager, I would do whatever it takes to get her to understand that she needs to stop.This month, Septermber she found out that she has Breast Cancer and will be going into surgery in October. Her doctor knows of this texting and he has mentioned to her she needs to save her money because of not knowing what she might need in the future after surgery. She is not truthful with Dr.We asked the Dr. if there's anything we can do, he said since she is buying and sending cards to this person, there's nothing to do.
Do you have any suggestions??
Thank you,
Rio1063

Find Care & Housing
My father was of sound mind (no dementia) but belonged to the generation that trusts everyone. He trusted that a fake FB message that looked like it was from a FB friend was legit and he engaged with them. He said he didn't know how to do gift cards so he actually mailed cash to them! Thankfully, someone at the post office questioned him. At that point, he finally let me in on what was going on.

I filed the form on this page: https://www.ic3.gov/

And this page: https://reportfraud.ftc.gov/

I copied as much of the messages as I could (they were deleting their messages after he read them). For you, it would be copying the texts.

I reported the fake profile to FB and blocked them. If this person is also interacting with your mom via FB, then you need to do that as well.

Get your hands on mom's phone and report the texts as spam and block the number. She doesn't even need to know you did this. Go into settings and allow only phone numbers in her contact list get through and screen all other calls. (An update to my Google Pixel phone recently kept even the realtor handling the sale of my parents' home from getting through to me. I had to add his number as a contact.)

And as others have said, make a report to the police.
Helpful Answer (12)
Reply to graygrammie
Report

Physically go to her house and take her phone away and give her a dollar store flip phone to use in the meantime with no internet etc.

Get her a prepaid credit card and let her use that.

She clearly has either mental illness or dementia (her good judgement is gone).

Is she diagnosed with dementia or does she have Mets to her brain from the breast cancer?
Helpful Answer (10)
Reply to Bulldog54321
Report

These scammers are ruthless and will work around the clock to lovebomb their victims. It is a ruthless scam especially on facebook and dating apps. I've gotten plenty of phony profiles of actors on my friends request page. I delete them all. I had joined a dating site some years ago and had a scammer contacting me. I think there were at least three people on this scam. They actually work in shifts. Finally, I blocked these people because it became a nuisance with getting texts all day and night. I found out later that some of these scams are actually part of an broader international crime ring called; "The Black Axe."

My suggestion is to take your mother's phone with no access to internet. Contact your Attorney General's Office and report the scam. Your mother is a vulnerable adult and should not be taken advantage of in this manner. She will need her money for her care and not passing it on to criminals to support their families.
Helpful Answer (10)
Reply to Scampie1
Report

I think this is a police matter, they deal with it quite a bit. Ask them! They might be able to track the source and keep other elderly people safe. If your mom owns a house, I'd be looking into whether or not she still owns it, title company? I bet Russell Crowe has an India accent. The only other option is to possibly block the caller? I think you can but after the police get their information,they can help you with this too,hopefully. Sorry about her health and hope all goes well. If they catch him, Moms going to get depressed. Now,this might sound silly but I saw a little "Pandy" bear online for about $30+ and it's AI generated to hug and such. Maybe as a recovery gift from Russell with a card saying "goodbye,I can't go on deceiving you, I have plenty of money, (bet he does)think of me with your new little friend,Russell" Then she'll have something to remember him by and won't feel so bad? Was going to say something about his wife but thought she would throw your gift away.
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to JuliaH
Report

A good friend’s mother has done this extensively and is out many thousands of dollars. My friend going to mom’s bank and alerting them, taking away her smart phone in exchange for a limited access phone with no internet, and limiting her access to money has finally stopped it. Her mother was and still is bitter over it, but my friend considers it fully worth it. Mom is now protected financially. It’s not truly over as mom still looks for ways around it. She asks caregivers to take her to get a new phone, threatens to open secret bank accounts and email addresses, and is very resentful. But her behavior is as unreasonable as it is unrelenting. It’s a job to stay on top of it. You cannot reason with mom, but you can act, as long as you’re prepared for anger and an ongoing process. I wish you the best in such a difficult situation
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to Daughterof1930
Report

Give her a different phone, one where numbers in and out can be blocked, like the RAZ Mobility phone I have for my Mom. No more nuisance calls, no texting, no internet. Your Mom won't be able to be reasoned with. You will need to accept there may be fallout from this: angry Mom, time wasted "contacting Russell Crowe" (really?? He seems to be a jerk in real life...)

No doctor is going to solve this problem except to diagnose her with something (like dementia at a level that requires the intervention of a PoA).

Are you her PoA? If not, this may be a tricky situation to get under control. You can try taking screen shots of her texts and presenting them to her bank and giving them a heads-up that she is being scammed. They are often helpful in these situations.
Helpful Answer (7)
Reply to Geaton777
Report
Suzy23 Sep 21, 2025
Good advice about the screenshots.

I have a friend whose 80-something mom was swindled out of her entire life savings and her house and car by a similar scam. The mom STILL believes this Prince Charming is a real person who is going to materialize and marry her any day now.

My friend ( her daughter and only child) tried to get court ordered guardianship because the mom had no will/ DPOA and no diagnosis. The mom went through court-ordered testing for dementia and it was found inconclusive. She’s now living in a slum motel on nothing but her meager Social Security and eating the motel breakfast plus whatever junk food she can afford from the convenience store next door. Really sad.
(2)
Report
Really not much you can do. Does Mom have Dementia? Ask her, if she really thinks that as famous as Russel Crowe is, he needs gift cards? Dr Phil had a whole program of this. It becomes a mental thing, its like brainwashing. The person really believes it and they don't think rationally anymore.
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to JoAnn29
Report
Beckyjane Sep 21, 2025
Please watch episodes of Catfished (or contact) or call her state's attorney general. Most of these scams originate in West Africa
(4)
Report
Your mother obviously has dementia. She can't have unsupervised internet access anymore nor can she have unlimited access to her own money.

Do as others have advised and get her a senior phone with no internet access that can only make calls or text. Then talk to her bank.
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to BurntCaregiver
Report

When they start giving away their money and falling for scams, it is time to shut them down. Anyway you can. Close all her credit cards, for starters. Good luck.
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to Isabelsdaughter
Report

You have indicated that your mom has dementia.
You will not make her understand that she is being scammed.
You will not be able to get her to stop sending cards, money, texts or anything else to anyone she should not be.
YOU need to take control of the situation.
Block numbers on her phone.
Set it up so she can make calls ONLY to those people that she knows.
If she is using a computer set up parental controls on that as well.
If all else fails you take the computer because it "broke" and you are going to have it fixed.
You take the phone because the carrier is changing and she needs a new phone. The phone you provide her with will not be a "smart phone" and you can have more control over that one.
The doctor telling her she needs to save money means nothing to her as she probably has no concept of money or if she does what the value of it is. Other than knowing that she can make purchases. But to her $1.00 is the same as $100.00 or $100,000. 00
If you are not POA of finances I think that ship has sailed and you need to get Guardianship.
If you are POA then you are not doing what you should to protect her assets.
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to Grandma1954
Report

See All Answers
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter