My Mom cannot afford assisted living. What do I do?

Why sell your Mom's house, rent it and it will pay for assisted living.

OK, so VJohnson back to you, how have things gone since you originally posted 2 months ago?

Vikki(Kiwanis!), MM, Bookluver, kudos to you all!

Who pays for the elderly to have in patient physical therapy

Commonwealth - Medicare and other insurances may pay for a certain length of time, renewed sooner if there is a hospital stay or surgery, as long as there is potential progress to be made and actual progress demonstrated.

It sounds like a very difficult situation. Generally, your local Department on Aging is a good place to start finding resources. In New York City there's also an iPhone App called Nancy which let's you remotely manage care for your parent using your phone. Pretty helpful for a lot of daily stuff like grocery delivery, transportation, cleaning services, meals, etc.

New to this folks. Trying to figure out what's best for my mom. She is 72 and never worked and now pretty encapable of doing anything. It takes major surgery for her to get a shower and go to the dr. Her 2nd husband of 20 years of marriage is 51 and will not and has not worked in 5 years. I think they are both bi-polar and possibly schizphrenic. One of her kids has been paying rent and utilities all that time and is running out of ressources. She has medicaid and receives a small ssi check through welfare not working ssi. She needs assistance with a lot and can't walk far. Their home is falling down around them and we need to get her somewhere else. She wants her husband to go with her but i could care less if he goes homeless at this point. I need to know if she can take him into an assisted living or senior living with her and if medicaid will pay. Anyone know the answer?

Annie...at the age of 51 I doubt he can get assistance unless he is disabled. At 51, able bodied....he needs to get a job. I doubt he can get into assisted living with her.

Katiekate thx. I really don't prefer him to go with her but she wants to stay with him. God knows why? I think I'm going to have to call and find out more options.

Btw....Katiekate if you get an email from me disregard it. Still learning how this works and misunderstood the email I received.

Annie, you are right that you may have to look for more options. I'd call your Area Agency on Aging or another local aging authority (you can find local options by going to www.aging.gov and finding your state). Your mom may be able to go to some type of assisted living though she sounds almost like she needs a nursing home if she can barely walk. Look for local agencies to help you. State's vary so much in what they provide/allow that going local is the best way. I hope the list you can find from aging.gov helps you.
Take care of yourself,
Carol

I agree. The biggest need a caregiver has is the need to just vent and be listened to. Advice is needed many times, of course, but just having people who are there to listen, read, and offer a "hug", albeit a digital one, that's what has kept me afloat even more than seeing a counselor in fact!

Wow, each has their own pain to deal with. As a spouse to my husband of 55 yrs now dealing with ALZ I am trying to find an affordable place for him. I understand its expensive but the cost will force me out of my modest home and than what?? What a scary time in life.

MsPat, if he is only 55 could he not get Social Security Disability and Medicaid?

Hello. I'm just joining. Thanks so much for all the information posted here. My mom has Parkinson. Last few years have been the worst/hardest. I'm youngest of six but as many of you have experienced...no one helps. I'm out state from where she was. I first took off 3months..to help . And then upon retiring back to work tried to hire folks to aide her. But it was always so something. So I brought her to stay with me for few months thinking as that would be best . I could still work and car for her without having to travel 4 hours. That lasted about 8months and I was sick of everything and everyone. I thought my family, specifically my sister would help. But no. No one helped. I then too her back home and hired aides to help. Well now I have a 25,000 bill, because I needed night/weekend workers. ..and had to hire an agency.
So I sent back and got her. Her health is worse than ever. I worked . Run hone at lunch to help her then back to work. But she still got bedsores. She became so obstinate.. and they got worse. So in last in the last 5 months she's had 2 surgeries to remove the infection. While I thought that would be helpful. It's worse. She's now in nursing home, but medicare will not pay for longer term care. She doesn't qualify for medicade. I have just found out that she does qualify for an aide. ..finallty. as she has a colostomy bsg, feeding tube....and these open wounds that in reality ....will not heal. I thought surgery would fix it all.
Plus nursing home now says she owes a copay of 160 a day that insurance doesn't pay and it's thousands of dollars.
It's all I can do to hold it together. I'm at threads right now. In the last 3years...I've had these last 3 months where I actuality could sleep uninterrupted. But that's about to end as I have to take her from there, cuz we can't afford it. I've been told that widow of a veteran there's help... but I can find no information to validate that. Any help would be great as my father was a veteran.
Struggling.
Thx.

I should also say that I have used caregiver.Com but just briefly. I did find a reliable person for my mom in her hometown but that was one of many needed. Between private duty and agency...I'm broke. It's been over 20 years since I've lived pay check to pay check. But I have used all of my savings in any kind of spare money I have attacks out my credit cards trying to pay everybody and I just can't see me quitting my job but I don't know how to pay for all of this stuff and care for her and work

Some posters here would be knowledgeable about the VA, unfortunately I don't know much about them. But, are you sure she cannot qualify for Medicaid? I'm hoping that posters, such as Igloo can share their experiences - one thing I've learned is not to assume anything, but check for yourself.

Did you apply to Medicaid? Was she turned down? What reason was given?

It sounds as though she was in rehab at a nursing home and she's used up the 20 days that Medicare will pay for at 100%. From day 21 to 100, there is a copay ( if the patient is making progress).  

Have you applied to the VA for Aid and Attendence?