My dad died 2 yrs ago. Have not heard anything from sibling or anything anout my dad's will. Sibling is in Canada.
I just got a certified letter saying I need to pay for dad's last year at nursing home. My sibling is POA for both parents.
I have no idea why this is coming to me. I was never privy to anything going on with my parents bills, other than to visit them. Or why it took 2yrs to send me a letter from a PA lawyer about a bill. Am I responsible? Im panicking here.
We are worrying about you and thinking about you and we hope you will update when you come to some resolution on this. I think your sister has made some major mistakes.One mistake is that thinking paying 50.00 a month gets her off the hood from a creditor. It only works to assume the debt, let them claim that you PAID so you must know you OWE. I think her mistakes won't come to bite you unless you let them, unless you make mistakes of your own, so do not act without legal advice. I like Tacy's advice IF you communicate at all, because it forces them to prove to you what this is for. If this is a collection agency you will not see a reply to that letter.
Good luck. Please see a lawyer.
Please consider an hour of Elder Law time. This is going to ruin the budget for a month or two, but in terms of mental health it may be worth it.
Good luck.
There is a list of payments and charges along with the letter
.The check # are out of order. So at first glance looks like it wasnt paid after june. That is incorrect. I had to go thru the list and write the dates/checks in proper order.
So Nursing home got paid something in August. So that makes me feel a bit better.
Odd thing is, the last payments of this 2019 are in the middle of the page/list. So glancing at the bottom of the list- it looks like bill was not paid since early june. Weird.
Document, document, document. There's no telling when that information, no matter how insignificant it may seem, can make a difference.
I'm sorry you had this dumped on you. Best wishes to you!
If you have any written communication with your sister, even texts or emails, print them and put them in that file, too.
1. If you're concerned that the letter isn't legit, check this link:
https://www.martindale.com/search/attorneys-law-firms-articles/?term=debt collection, creditor's rights near Pennsylvania
and/or search online for "PA creditors' rights law firms", or "PA debt collection law firms." If the firm isn't listed, you could call the PA State Bar directly and tell them you're trying to locate a firm (with that name) and need a contact number and address.
Don't tell them you already have it; let them advise you if the firm is a PA law firm. This will help determine if it is in fact a law firm or is a scam outfit.
2. Was your father in fact in a nursing home for the last year of his life? If not, then definitely something's amiss!
3. Do you know if your father had a Will? Or a Trust? If so, do you know if your brother was Executor/Personal Representative, or Trustee?
4. Although your brother may have had POA authority, that would have ended on your father's death. Then the Executor, etc. would take over management of your father's assets.
5. I did some quick checking. This law firm's site offers insight into PA laws, including the statute of limitation for filing claims, specifically, within one year after the first notice of death published as required by law.
https://mcandrewslaw.com/publications-and-presentations/articles/paying-the-creditors-of-an-estate/
Your brother should address this issue, b/c if the claim is just being filed now, it may be that it hasn't been filed properly and/or the statute of limitations has run. This is critical in determining the legitimacy, timely filing, and what's known as "perfection" of the lien.
6. The 4th paragraph of the URL above addresses a situation in which there are insufficient assets to pay creditors.
It also may be that the estate had no funds and this law firm is coming after the grown children. Two years seem to me like an awful long time to wait before filing a claim, so I do wonder if something's amiss.
7. Since you don't have information on what happened after your father's death, I would, as others suggest, start with your brother and notify him. It doesn't sound as if you're close or in regular contact, so I would keep the original letter and send him a copy of it and of the envelope, and ask him specifically to address the issue of whether or not your father had a Will, and if he handled it.
There are more issues, such as what's known as intestacy if your father had no Will, but I would first get in touch with your brother and ensure that he's involved.
8. As to contacting the firm, I'm of "two minds" about this. I would try to get in touch with your brother first and clarify issues, but I would also be concerned about filial obligation statutes. You might call the PA Bar and ask if there's a free legal hotline, and see if you can get legal advice on this, especially if you don't have any funds to pay for the last year's care.
9. Another aspect that should be pursued is who signed any admission papers, and under what capacity. I'm not sure at this point how this would interface with filial obligations, but it's a good idea to know if anyone, such as your brother, accepted responsibility (perhaps w/o knowing it) for your father's financial obligations to the nursing home.
Don't panic, but do plan to do some research to protect yourself, starting with visiting your local senior center to get free advice on what kind of attorney might be needed if you need one. And I would also clarify the filial obligations statute and case law, including whether or not you, in whatever your financial situation is, could be liable if sued.
When you feel up to it, this is a summary of the PA Filial Obligation statute:
https://www.paelderlaw.net/pennsylvanias-filial-support-law-children-can-be-held-responsible-for-parents-unpaid-nursing-home-bill/
I believe its legit letter.
I have no knowledge of if my dad had a will. I think he did. Im pretty sure she is executor. Parents never discussed this with me. I wouldnt be surprised if she told them not to, or said ill handle it dont worry.
Assets have not been liquidated.
They probably tried to contact her but she gave them wrong address.
Long story short sibling was still writing checks on a deceased person's account. Thats a big no no. They are supposed to be locked down till probate and then reopened by executor to probably pay Bill's. As poa and supposed executor -didnt notify anyone (accounts) that he died. Wasnt taking care of property, not paying that bill off, and lied in the hearing about a lawyer she spoke to, and caught in shenanigans. They all knew and worked with this lawyer. Said he is upstanding in his field, and wouldnt put his license in jeopardy. They didnt take kindly to that at all. Long story short I was awarded executor. But it is a hollow victory. It's going to be a nightmare to do. Everything is a mess. Sibling wanted to be co-exec and they said no. She had 3 yrs to do something and didnt.
This is not a fun win at all. Sibling took off with all valuables already, and probably all of the rest will go towards medical bills. But at I know what is going on. I wasnt allowed to know anything about moms will and didnt get half the assets. I suspected I was being lied to and that was the tip of the iceberg.
So the takeaway is if you think shananagans are going on trust your instincts!. Get a lawyer FAST. Dont wait, they can help you and hold that person accountable. There is only a window of opportunity to get that done.
My lawyer also saw that it wasnt just a personal family squabble but real shananagans there.
I'm just afraid I'll still be hit with Bill's that I dont know about, and the estate cant cover.
So the letter came from an Attorney? Does the name on the letterhead sound familiar? I am also wondering if this is a scam. Whatever you do, do not call any of the telephone numbers on the letterhead as those numbers could belong to the scammer. You can check on the internet if there is such an Attorney. Sometimes the internet will say if others have received such letters from that person.
No, you are NOT responsible. If this does turn out to be a legit debt, the Estate is responsible.
Although, I agree that you should send a copy of the letter to your sister; however, I don't think she will be much help to you! The lawyer who is trying to collect for NH may have been in touch with your sister and got no where--just giving you heads up!
Don't panic...breath...find a lawyer or legal aid!
Just my 2 cents!
difficulties. Some auditors were brought in to help. The auditors started sending out notices to former patients to pay the remainder of the outstanding balance that was not paid by medicare. There was no balance due. They were trying to collect the amount over and above the amount allowed by medicare.
It was serious enough that all of the local news got hold of the stories and warned people that this was illegal and not to pay anything.
What you have may be something similar. I would not pay anything with out a full accounting of the account. It just could be a scam being run by bill collectors or along those lines.
I think you really need to obtain a full copy of her entire record and maaybe even seek legal council.
Good luck
Then said she was paying a tiny bit per month, and said they cant come after you if bill is being paid. It stopped getting paid in june. No amswer as to why. Nursing home wasted no time coming after me.
I have no accounting of anything. Didnt with my mom either.
She must have known this was going to happen bc she gave them fame address.
Thank you for your update below. So relieved that you are in the hands of this lawyer now. I have to think that your sister is well aware of assets and is trying to keep the facts hidden. There is something VERY wrong with all her responses to you.
I hate to think of the costs you are incurring here, but I cannot help but be so relieved you are seeing a Lawyer. This is a heck of a lesson you are learning, and likely to be costly in every way from monetary to emotional, but your words below on what we must do now to protect our families in future are so good.
I hope you will update us as you walk this journey. You could be such a help to so many as you walk this walk with the Lawyer.
I personally will always be on the lookout for "Update from Jasmina" and my thoughts are with you. Hope this goes well for you.
I also need to talk to lawyer about how much of mom's assets automatically go to husband. Mom died and he was still living. Havent found concrete answers online yet. I was told, most of the assets had to be kept, and added to dads assets. So no personal items distributed. NONE. Not even sentimental. It has been 7yrs now. Still nothing.
Everyone was telling me go see a lawyer. If you think something is off it probably is. Dont let your Executor tell you, you cant ask questions. Or provide you with O answers. You have a right to know!!!
I was even told dont open the mail (when dad was living) only Executor can do that. It is illegal. I never did. The lawyer said all this time? Why not?
I have to remind myself that narcissists will always try to get you to believe a different reality than what is really going on. This has happened all my life. My mom and sis always telling me my feelings/reactions were wrong. The gaslighting was tremendous. Still is. If I brought up (the will) Im a filthy money gruber. It was 2yrs after death. I didnt have a right to know, and no right to question anything. Withholding knowledge is power.
So finding out what assets go to husband is next. I'm writing all my questions down for when I talk to him next. At least with him I get answers. That is more than I've ever gotten in 7yrs.