I am going to the hospital tomorrow to become familiarized with a Foley Catheter. I am squeamish. This is not for me. Advice?

We do have some nurses on this sight maybe they can give some input. I too would not want to be doing this. Why do they feel she needs a catheter? They can contribute to UTIs.

I kind of know how you feel. I had to help my mom with the recovery after a mastectomy-tube, drainage, etc. Not like a catheter but still not something i ever planned on doing. Mom could not do this by herself-dad would not have been a good helper either. My dad had a foley catheter for a few months. Then the doctor did some testing that determined the urge and muscle function to say go pee was not going to work anymore. Then they said get the superpubic catheter-tubing goes thru the abdomen. would be less irritation etc. I would take dad to the dr. every 30 days to have the equipment changed. I never offered to do this job at home for him. I have since told my mother that i want nothing to do with the area below the belt for my dad-period. They have home care that can do the daily empty of the bag and keep him clean and dry. We have a cat who is diabetic needs a shot of insulin every day two times. I can not watch family member who does this i can not stand the sight of a needle-I will never be able to do this job for my cat. Maybe you could look into home nursing care/assistance for this job if you can't get the hang of it. empty the bag is not too bad but the rest of it-i would arrange for backup for sure keeping that area clean is a must-if it is clean and dry it won't smell as bad too.

Emptying the catheter bag will be easy. Open tap, drain into bottle, flush. Washing around the catheter should be same as washing the area. (Maybe Mom could do this in the shower with a handheld shower head?)

Or is this an 'in/out' catheter to be inserted manually each time to drain?

Or a permanent suprapubic catheter? If so, the tube comes out of the abdomin instead. Not too icky.

Go along for training if you want. Find out what's actually required.

But remember - you can say no!

Ask, if I say no, what's the plan?

I am one of the old retired nurses on this site. I am pretty certain they are speaking of an indwelling catheter, and I am HOPING they are simply wanting you to learn to do basic care, emptying, infection prevention (difficult in itself. They will claim often enough that it is contamination from feces; but actually in female the urethra is short, the catheter holds the urethra open a bit, the catheter moves up and down in the area a bit, and infection is common. I would use one D-Mannose capsule a day for prevention of e-coli bacteria adhering to the wall of the bladder when it gets in (works like cranberry juice but easier and not acidic and better). The capsules are large (I use source natural product on Amazon, about 32.00 for 120.00 and capsules are large, so open and sprinkle on food if Mom has trouble swallowing.
You are basically going to empty it about three times a day as needed; not hard at all.
NOW, IF they are talking in and out catheterization (some men do this themselves) I would refuse to do it. It would have to be done often, is almost impossible to tell when the bladder is distended and it is needed without having access to ultrasound machine. It makes for MUCH MORE certainty of infection. Moreover, it is, to this nurse's mind, too intimate to do to one's own Mom. (I said I was and OLD nurse, but I would not want to do this on my own.
My advice to you is to go and see what this is about and if it is too much for you to tell them NO. They will say there is no other way than for you to do this. Repeat slowly as needed "N-O". And then take it from there.
You may be seeing the day coming when Mom needs more than inhome care. Why are they placing an indwelling catheter? It is rare. They often prefer incontinence because of the risk of infection.
I hope you will update us. As I said, I am an old nurse; I would NOT have wanted to do this for my Mom. It is much much more intimate than just washing her. This is legs spread. Hard to do in a low bed, a STERILE procedure in which contamination occurs if the tip of the cath hits skin or mucous membrane. Not easy and WAY intimate. Even learning to don sterile gloves is not easy. And your hands and catheter, which is long and wiggly, must stay sterile. Urethras also vary a bit, aren't always easy to identify. You will see new nurses trying to poke catheters in any number of "wrong " places. It amazes me what medicine expects us to do at home now.
I don't want to scare you. But I want you to be prepared to say "NO, I am sorry; I will NOT be doing this. What is plan B" if you need to.
I wish you the very best of luck. Let us know how this goes for you.

Thankyou Alva!
In/out catheter gets an instant NO from me too. I'd do myself, but not my relatives.

I worked with RNs, was their secretary, and we had one who refused to put in a catheter so don't let anyone into guilting you. Now I think some stay in but are removed periodically. Either way, I don't think you can be required to do anything you are not comfortable with.

My Mom broke her shoulder and we took her to the ER. When put in a cubicle the RN thru a gown at me and said "dress her". I told her I was not comfortable doing that because Mom had a broken arm and "she" was the nurse. She said "yes, I am the nurse" and did it. Another time a dr wanted urine sample from Mom but expected me to do it. I said no that I was not getting down on my knees in his tiny little bathroom to try and get my Mom to go in a little cup. I have a hard time doing it for myself. Told him to give me the stuff and my RN daughter would do it at home. He agreed and she did, grudgingly. When Mom was in the AL, if she had an accident, I called the aide. Paying big bucks to live there, they can do the dirty work.

So if this is more than emptying the bag and ur uncomfortable doing it, speak up. They can order "in home" care.

I wouldn't get ahead of yourself. It's not so much nurse as plumber.

The bit you're likely to be handling (and this is assuming that your mother can't manage it herself, and most people can) is not - how can I put it - at the business end. All you'll be learning is how to turn the tap on and off. Surely to goodness you're not so squeamish you can't empty a bag of urine down the lavatory? You're allowed to wear gloves. Nothing terrible will happen. You won't even have to look "down there" (or, rather, "up there" because you'll be concentrating on the leg end of things).

But it would be sensible and useful for you to learn as well what problems to look out for and what to do if they happen - discomfort, pain, spasms (rare), blood or cloudiness in the urine, etc.

Just be glad it's not your Dad and it's not a Conveen. That's all I can say.

Try to keep an open mind. This may be a temporary, may simply be in place and have a tap, or need replacing but this is not worse than doing a personal wash and a bit of plumbing it isn't complicated so don't worry in advance.
If you find you cannot manage going forward arrange for a carer who can come in and do the necessary. I have sympathy with your position as I refused to do personal care for my elderly mother it just turned my stomach - but we found a carer who came in just for an hour for the purpose when necessary. You'll find a way to deal with it.

When you go home the will certainly set you up with HOME HEALTH; I wouldn't worry as they will teach you and make sure you're comfortable.

You will need to be careful that the catheter doesn't become twisted and keep the catheter line patent; you will actually find it rewarding when you become comfortable.

I'm assuming that what you mean is that she is being sent home with a Foley catheter "in place" and they want you to learn how to empty it. The bag fills up and needs to be emptied a few times a day. So, unless you want to pay for a home health aide to come into her home 3 times a day, you need to learn to empty it.

Emptying a Foley is FAR easier than dealing with having to wash a person's genitals due to incontinence. You just wear disposable gloves, empty the urine into some type of re-usable large plastic container, flush the urine down the toilet and rinse out the container. This process is repeated, on average, 3 times in 24 hours.

In terms of being "squeamish" - let's just say that every woman on the planet has wiped her own a** after bowel movements and touched her vulva for menstruation hygiene. So, assuming that you have bowel movements and have menstruated many times during your life, dealing with a Foley is no big deal by comparison.

JoAnn29 - If a person is being sent home with an indwelling catheter, it's either because they have urinary retention (cannot pee voluntarily) or they leak urine constantly. Either way, they would need the catheter.

There is nothing to it. All you'll be doing is emptying the bag of pee once in the morning and once in the evening.
It's easy. I do this for my 96 yr old dad.
Your mom's pee won't smell any more than your own and your nose or hands aren't going to be anywhere by her privates, you're only touching the tube and the bag which are at least a few feet away.

If she has to have it for a long time, they'll be sending a Nurse out once a month to change it or you'll take her in to have it done.

You've got this, you're only emptying pee from the bag by using the tube to drain the pee.

The cathiter /(urine/pee) bag must be emptied or tge urine/pee will go back inside your mom and poison her.

Mare sure the Cathier bag hangs lower than your mom's butt so the pee will drain.

Its now 3 days later, so how did u do?

NYC -- Oh my, I get you! No advice just empathy. I cannot handle anything that comes out of a body except blood, I guess because it isn't waste matter. I have to keep my eyes off the urine bag in a hospital room. I can't handle someone coughing up junk and then telling me to look at it. Nope. Not sure how I managed to change diapers for four kids and ten grandkids, must have been God's grace because I'm definitely not gifted with pee, poo, vomit, or mucous. I'd be telling the hospital, "Not me, make other arrangements."

IM assuming they want you to EMPTY the bag of urine 3x per day. I dont think they can expect you to take out the catheter and insert a new one - ie usually every 3-4 weeks i think - you will need a nurse to come to house to do that part. If she needs a catheter - she needs it but find out for sure since UTIs are all too common with catheters esp if they are not replaced. My father had a catheter when he was recovering from hip surgery and he developed a SEVERE UTI - he was doubled over in pain - took the rehab 20 hrs to take it out and relieve him of his pain - sadly it turned into a MRSA infection that infected his blood stream and heart and he passed away. I dont mean to scare you - since many many people have catheters but you have to be on constant lookout for infections, etc......if there is any chance she can urinated on her own - then choose that option otherwise be vigilant with catheter.r

Why does your mom need a foley catheter? There BETTER be a good reason. You do realize she is at high risk of urinary tract infection. IF there is a genuine medical necessity (if urination is dribbling, which is incontinence, she would be better off with diapers), there should be no reason why home health nursing can help with you.

When she has a bowel movement some stool can get on the catheter and travel into her bladder. Catheters can be VERY dangerous.

Unless there is a good medical reason for the catheter--your doctor should order to take it out.

Tell her doctor you want hospice in place then with doctor orders you can schedule the initial meeting with hospice. Do it right away because it takes a few days to set it up. Hospice isn’t just for people dying. They can be temporary short term but the longer they’re in place, the easier things are. Plus Medicare covers everything & even supplies & I think also meds. Hospice has a nurse that visits along with aides after it’s all scheduled. The nurse can do the catheter & teach you if it comes out, how to clean it, etc. Good Shepherd is the one that comes to my house for my mom who qualifies at 87 yrs old with dementia. They are very professional, helpful & caring. Good luck!

My husband had one for months. All I had to do was have him stand or sit by the toilet untie the leg band and open the cap on the tubing which empty’s into the toilet. Re cap the end re tie the leg band And that was it. Of course she needs to stay clean in that vicinity as usual. UTI could occur but my husband only got one. The bag is changed out about once a month by a nurse.

If she is in hospital, perhaps dr can send her to rehab to get her stronger before she goes home. Or could order in home nursing to handle this task.

Be honest w/hospital staff so they very clearly understand that you can or cannot do this. Once you get her home, you could be on your own for several or many days. Just because they tell you they will arrange help for you does NOT mean it will happen...or when it will happen. Trust me on that.

If you cannot do it - then tell her it would be dangerous to her health to send her home. Make that clear to them too. And go see the hospital social worker or case management person.

NYCARETAKER, how did it go when you went in on Friday?

She should qualify for a visiting nurse to come change it at home, depending on how ambulatory she is. The nurse came when my grandfather, who could use a walker, needed his cath changed. He had an aide several times a week for personal care. I had no problem monitoring color, volume and changing the bag.

JUST SAY NO. NO. NO.
You can't. It's an unfair burden to caregivers to risk their (mental/emotional or physical) health with care they are not able to provide. You're human. You don't need to give them any excuse. It's not possible. They try to burden us with this stuff. Not okay. Sending hugs and hope.

Ask that home health nursing or aides be scheduled. A nurse can come weekly and change out the catheter when its time. Do not allow her to be discharged until this is set up. Tell hospital social worker you cannot accommodate her needs.

Does she only need it for a short while? If so why can't she have a Home Health visiting nurse do this function?

I so often read how the hospitals send a very needy elder home, expecting others to do their jobs for them. In this instance, if it was needing to care for oneself and oneself was capable, fine. When it is for another, THEY think it is a piece of cake, but THEY do this all the time. Many of us have NEVER done anything like that!

When I was in the hospital (almost 4 weeks!), I was BEGGING them to let me go home. Sure, I was on TPN and industrial strength IV antibiotics, all through a PICC line (not allowed anything by mouth), but still, was it *really* necessary to keep me there THAT long? I was not that old, I was able to get around, care for myself once they gave me towels, etc to facilitate that (for days, there was nothing and NO ONE bathed me!) I had no need for pain medication (finally demanded they take it away - when told I can't have it back if I need pain meds, I told the nurse the only pain I have is from the stupid plastic case it is in, to prevent theft, when it hits me in the head trying to move the IV pole around!!!) There really was no reason other than $$$$$ to keep me there. I absolutely HATED IT.

They finally relented and ordered home nursing and supplies to be sent. I had a pump to do the antibiotics 4x/day, a feed bag the nurse would prep each day with the vitamin additives, and various supplies. Nurse would also do a blood draw, and clean/change the dressing on the PICC line periodically, so they could monitor and adjust the meds as needed. It was SO much better for me to be HOME! But again, I was capable of doing what was needed to care for myself and do the antibiotics. Other than prepping the feed bag, blood draw and dressing, I didn't need help! Yet people with dementia and/or major medical issues who need a LOT of support and help are sent home tout de suite!! No regard for how much work is needed, no concern about whether the family can do what needs to be done, no concerns about behavioral issues or whether family needs help because they have to work!!! Go figure.

We all have limits on what we are prepared to do.

There is no shame in stating, I am sorry, but I cannot do this. It does not make you a bad person.

You need to talk to the hospital discharge planners about other options. I know nothing at all about catheters, but ask about having home care come in to manage it.

I hope things went ok for you. I am constantly amazed at the things that the medical profession expect of family members without any conversation or information up front. Any time aftercare is required the family member expected to provide the care SHOULD (but rarely is) get a description of the care ahead of time and be allowed to have a chance to think it through before being asked to commit to accepting the medical care of another. I have NEVER heard of this being done. The family members do not have to do anything that they feel they cannot do. There are a lot of things I have undertaken in order to get my sons, husband or myself home, but it needs to be a choice, not an order given by the doctor or nurses.

My wife's Foley is stays put. it is changed at least every 30 days and 2 weeks if there are any problems.

All I have to do is empty the bag, keep her clean, and find ways to keep feces out. Since she is bed or wheel chair bound and doesn't know when she has a BM this can be difficult. I also change the bag and exterior tubing as necessary. This is an easy 2 minute task.

Home health comes when the catheter needs to be replaced usually timing it with their regular weekly visit. If I was expected to change the catheter, I would not be willing to do it.

My husband has a catheter and all I do is drain the bag in the morning and before he goes to bed. Since he is on Hospice, the nurse changes it once a month. If your mom has Medicare, she could have Home Health Aides come in to bathe her atleast 3 times a week, but she will need Dr's. Orders requesting Home Health or you can pay privately and contact an Agency on you own. Don't be afraid, there is nothing to it.

You get used to what you have to do.. its that simple and easy. The more you do it, the easier it will be. I have friends who adopted a daughter with spina bifida from another county,,and she needs to be "straight cathed" every day, several times, so her urine does not build up. Could I do this,, maybe if I had to,, but she and her hubs and teenage daughter have learned to do, and do it without a qualm. They were taught how to do it at the orphanage in that county,, and even got it done in the plane on the way home, Then they taught their daughter. To empty the foley you will not have to be all up in stuff so much, at least that is good!
I work with trach patients, and we have to teach the families how to suction the trach, and change the entire thing out every month if home care doesn't do it. Scarey yes, but they learn and it becomes second nature after the first few times. I promise you can do this.. you are stronger than you think!