How to explain to police that woman with dementia is violent (biting, wielding knives, etc.) and tells lies about being abused. The abuse is actually from her. False arrests.
We went through that too and my heart goes out to you. My mother came to live with my family - unexpectedly because she had a series of mini-strokes and couldn't take care of herself. At the time we didn't know what was wrong with her until she was finally diagnosed by a neurologist and placed on Namenda to help with the Alzheimer's diagnoses. She kept saying she wanted to go home and her behavior became violent against my family members. She'd call the police and tell them we were keeping her here without her consent. As you are aware they will talk to her alone and someone will talk to the family member(s). Calmly explain to the police that your loved one has Dementia. They will understand. They have formalities they have to follow but they will be less alarmed when they call.
Also, talk to their family doctor. My mother's doctor prescribed her behavioral medicine that calmed her down. They can't help it. They are frightened. They know something is wrong, they know they are losing control of their minds and they don't want to be a burden on your family. It's a nightmare for them. She'd cry and apologize at night. It was so sad.
A light at the end of the tunnel.... One of the home health nurses told my mother she needed to move into assisted living where she could be among other seniors, have activities, a nice apartment of her own, etc. Once, my mother knew she wasn't going home she decided that's what she wanted to do and got excited about it. We found a great place eight minutes from our home and she settled in right away. It was amazing! And, she seems happy with her situation. Surrounded by her belongings and furniture. It gave her back control.
The manager explained that they find people who have early Alzheimer's or Dementia move into an independent assisted living facility they tend to become more independent again and get healthier. She immediately got used to their schedule, has her close group of friends and they were correct. We''ve even been able to have the doctor reduce the behavioral medicine - - slowly.
Good luck to you and your family. You have to make the right decisions for your parent and your family. I'm sure you will.
My mother, with dementia and other serious health issues, is always telling people I exaggerate her health and diagnosis. She tells people that she was not very sick during the last hospitalization. She can't take in that she was unconscious and unresponsive for the best part of the day in the ER and in the room after admission. My friend and I both sat that whole long day wondering if she would regain consciousness..her dementia has been worse since this episode too. Her primary is not helpful at all. Mom is able to appear "with it" when she needs. I always get looked at sideways as overreacting. So hard to be the bad guy all the time. I am grateful for these posts about recording behavior! I hope you choose to do the same....this is excellent advise. Sending hugs for your journey down this road!
I would have surveillance cameras installed in every room. Solves a LOT. If you're in the NY, NJ, CT area, I know a wonderful camera guy who's reasonably priced. Let me know.
It is very important that you get your loved one to a doctor and have them evaluated. Also have your POA papers and her diagnosis on had to show authorities. I she is violent are you able to place her in a dementia unit. If you can not afford it call your local Agency on Aging and ask for help.
Destroyed, are you the one who's been falsely arrested?
Whether it's you or another family member, though, I can imagine that you're not feeling too trusting where the police are concerned. And yet it's vital that you get the police involved so that they can help, instead of getting hold of the wrong end of the stick.
I don't know how your local police force is structured, of course, but I would guess that there is someone on the team who deals with domestic issues and family liaison. Why not call the police and ask who you should talk to? A constructive discussion that you've initiated could be really helpful.
Get her to a geriatric psychiatrist ASAP. Sometimes an inpatient psych evaluation can be a godsend in stabilizing a dementia patient with violent and abusive tendencies.
Protect yourself by documenting behaviors with recordings and/or cameras. Also, you don't say if this is your relative, but if she is, contact her doctor about the mood swings. Medications can be useful in these situations.
One observation is that Sunrise Syndrome is different from Sundowning because the person may wake up in a confabulation mind set. During a Sunrise Syndrome conversation with the content may filled with confabulations; verbal statements and/or actions that inaccurately describe history, background and present situations. Sundowning in contrast displays as confusion, disorientation, wandering, searching, escape behaviors, tapping or banging, vocalization, combativeness; the demons of anxiety, anger, fear, hallucinations and paranoia come out.
Confabulating and Confabulations Honest lies In Alzimer's psychology, confabulation (verb: confabulate) defined as: the production of fabricated, distorted or misinterpreted memories about oneself or the world, without the conscious intention to deceive.
Confabulations are major concern because confabulations are likely to be believed and acted upon.
It is difficult for everyone to accept a mind is damaged by Alzheimer's Disease. Not only is memory damaged their ability to process thoughts and conversations is impaired.
Confabulations are a major annoyance and can be dangerous- when we the take everything in a discussion at face value. Confabulating is very frequently observed in people with Alzheimer's information that is blatantly false yet are coherent, internally consistent, and appear relatively normal.
IMCO, if a person has dementia, Alzheimer's, assume they are confabulating and do not take what they say as face value. Validate You can not assume what they say because it is coherent, internally consistent, and appears relatively normal.
I have a printed copy of this in the File-of-Life envelope on my fridge to EMT;s along with MOLST, health care proxy and med information.
If the local police are worth their salt, they will figure out what's going on. Our mother drove over to the local police dept and filed a report that my older brother had shoved her and broke her back. They "got" what was going on, took the report and that was all. I did feel bad that there is a report with my brother's name stating "Elder Abuse". At this point, my sister and I were in the process of obtaining guardianship. Once we got legal assistance, we took her car away, got mother into assisted living, on correct meds, and she is now on an even keel. BTW we also used a recording device from time to time, just in case we had to prove ourselves to the judge. Also, check with your local Elder Abuse group, elder abuse goes both way and if you are hit or injured by this person, you may need to document these instances.
I am sure you will hear better answers, but there are very small recording devices available. Some look like key fobs & some like pens. Record her behaviour. I would think her doctor would be helpful. I cannot speak from this exact type of experience, but I like to believe that she has been seen & evaluated by a doctor who might be able to provide guidance. Perhaps the doctor has seen her exhibit this behaviour? Does she have a difficult time being 'good' in public or those she might want to hide this behaviour from? You will get better suggestions from people with more experience than I. The recording device is something we wished we had purchased and used. Hindsight being 20/20.
Also, talk to their family doctor. My mother's doctor prescribed her behavioral medicine that calmed her down. They can't help it. They are frightened. They know something is wrong, they know they are losing control of their minds and they don't want to be a burden on your family. It's a nightmare for them. She'd cry and apologize at night. It was so sad.
A light at the end of the tunnel.... One of the home health nurses told my mother she needed to move into assisted living where she could be among other seniors, have activities, a nice apartment of her own, etc. Once, my mother knew she wasn't going home she decided that's what she wanted to do and got excited about it. We found a great place eight minutes from our home and she settled in right away. It was amazing! And, she seems happy with her situation. Surrounded by her belongings and furniture. It gave her back control.
The manager explained that they find people who have early Alzheimer's or Dementia move into an independent assisted living facility they tend to become more independent again and get healthier. She immediately got used to their schedule, has her close group of friends and they were correct. We''ve even been able to have the doctor reduce the behavioral medicine - - slowly.
Good luck to you and your family. You have to make the right decisions for your parent and your family. I'm sure you will.
Whether it's you or another family member, though, I can imagine that you're not feeling too trusting where the police are concerned. And yet it's vital that you get the police involved so that they can help, instead of getting hold of the wrong end of the stick.
I don't know how your local police force is structured, of course, but I would guess that there is someone on the team who deals with domestic issues and family liaison. Why not call the police and ask who you should talk to? A constructive discussion that you've initiated could be really helpful.
One observation is that Sunrise Syndrome is different from Sundowning because the person may wake up in a confabulation mind set. During a Sunrise Syndrome conversation with the content may filled with confabulations; verbal statements and/or actions that inaccurately describe history, background and present situations.
Sundowning in contrast displays as confusion, disorientation, wandering, searching, escape behaviors, tapping or banging, vocalization, combativeness; the demons of anxiety, anger, fear, hallucinations and paranoia come out.
In Alzimer's psychology, confabulation (verb: confabulate) defined as: the production of fabricated, distorted or misinterpreted memories about oneself or the world, without the conscious intention to deceive.
Confabulations are major concern because confabulations are likely to be believed and acted upon.
It is difficult for everyone to accept a mind is damaged by Alzheimer's Disease. Not only is memory damaged their ability to process thoughts and conversations is impaired.
Confabulations are a major annoyance and can be dangerous- when we the take everything in a discussion at face value. Confabulating is very frequently observed in people with Alzheimer's information that is blatantly false yet are coherent, internally consistent, and appear relatively normal.
IMCO, if a person has dementia, Alzheimer's, assume they are confabulating and do not take what they say as face value. Validate You can not assume what they say because it is coherent, internally consistent, and appears relatively normal.
I have a printed copy of this in the File-of-Life envelope on my fridge to EMT;s along with MOLST, health care proxy and med information.
Also, check with your local Elder Abuse group, elder abuse goes both way and if you are hit or injured by this person, you may need to document these instances.