Handling cousin's passive aggressive posts. Any ideas to stop it or should I just move forward and ignore it?

I was thinking that same thing,, she could always respond to those post with a stock answer of "Mom would love to see you for a few weeks, and wants to know when she can come visit you at your lovely home? She would so enjoy it and from your posts we know you would be thrilled to host her for a vacation!"

I could have written this post myself actually, except for the PA posts on Facebook, my cousin does the exact same thing & it infuriates me!!!! If it were me and my cousin were adding the FB posts into the sh*t show that's already going on, I'd BLOCK her. She won't know it b/c FB doesn't tell her you've blocked her, but you won't see her toxic posts at all anymore and she won't see yours. If she contacts you as to why she's not 'hearing' from you on social media, tell her that you've realized 'social media' is actually ANTI-SOCIAL media & you're no longer participating in the toxic wasteland these days. Done & done.

That said, my cousin lives 3500 miles away from me in Staten Island in a 3 story home. I am an only child to a very difficult mother living in Memory Care Assisted Living with advanced dementia, incontinence and about 10 other issues too numerous to mention, at 94.5 years old. I've been handling/managing her entire life for the past 10 years, this time around, since I had to move my folks close to me in 2011 after dad had to quit driving. So now, my sainted cousin has been telling mom she would LOVE to have her come live with HER, that she will make up an in law apartment for her in her house! Her house with stairs. Mom is wheelchair bound, I forgot to mention. An inlaw apartment with a kitchen, which means mom would try to cook & burn the entire house down, with advanced dementia. Hello? What planet are we living on??? I have told my cousin 100x that mom has advanced dementia, has she not noticed when mom talks about 'riding the subway to come visit mama & papa' who have been dead for 36 years and 65 years respectively???? This cousin makes herself out to be The Good Guy and me out to be The Bad Guy b/c why oh why am I not taking in my Poor Sweet Wonderful Mother? Well, first off, b/c she's not sweet & wonderful and also b/c it requires an entire TEAM of care givers to care for the woman 24/7!!!!!!!!!!!! So every time mom says "Oh B would LOVE for me to come live with HER" I say, "Great, when is she coming to PICK YOU UP?" That's when the conversation comes to an abrupt halt & the subject is changed.

I truly hate people who love to instigate and make themselves out to be saints when it's all talk. And talk is cheap. Real life with these narcissistic mothers is something else that nobody understands or can empathize with unless they're stuck in the trenches themselves.

As you can see, your post hit a raw nerve with me. :)

Go ahead & BLOCK your daft cousin on FB and get some peace that way! Good luck!

My sister does this with my mother.......

I called mom and she sounded depressed. Are you sure that she's being taken care off.
I called mom and she said you wouldn't take her _______to get_____
I called mom and she said that you tested positive for Ebola.
I called mom and she said that you refuse to give her parakeet a birthday party.

Best advice for this. Ignore it or fight Passive Aggressive with Passive Aggressive.

My standard reply to stuff like you are getting on FB is "What a Weird thing to say"

Unfollow her on FB then you won’t see her crap. I have done that with every person who makes my blood pressure rise.

The older I get, the more I realize I don’t give a rats a** what people think. I’ve gotten a lot more vocal about it, too. I used to be so stressed and hurt. I think as I’ve gotten older, I just realized I didn’t have time for other people’s crap. Life was just too short.

I agree with the peeps on here - block her. If she persists, give it to her for reals. Tell her what your mom is really like. Nobody is perfect, and I don’t see anything wrong in this day in age with us letting family know how even your “sweet” mom is not perfect. Why the charade? To what end? Who are you really sparing?

Adults can have adult conversations.

Stop being passive-aggressive yourself. Tell your cousin that you plan to block her because you can't handle her posts. - Then block her.

Remember, what people say in online posts says far more about them than anyone else.

First off call or speak to your cousin in person face-to-face with your siblings about it. Don't wage a passive-aggressive war of your own with her on social media.

Tell your cousin EXACTLY what I'm telling you right now.

That you are happy and appreciate that she has a loving and healthy relationship with your mother. Tell her that you and your siblings did not have this kind of experience with your mother. Let her know, without actually quoting your mother because you're not out to ruin their relationship, that she says terrible things about people (your cousin included) behind their backs and has for years.
If this doesn't quiet her social media storm, then tell her that she's more than welcome to have your mother come live with her and she can become her unpaid 24-hour caregiver.
Watch how fast this shuts her sanctimonious a$$ up.

Blocking would be my first choice, but there's always the option of "unfollowing" the person on FB. That way you're still technically Friends on there - but, your timeline will not display her posts.
I've unfollowed many people on FB and they have no idea ...

I say, ignore her and unfriend her so you don't have to look at them. If she contacts you tell her why you unfriended her - not necessarily the personal details you don't want to share with her.

However, if she loves her aunt so much, maybe she'll volunteer to be her caregiver (sarcasm).

You have enough on your hands without having to deal with your cousin who is clueless about the situation.