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I questioned my fiancé about the paid aid hours. His answer was the he did not approve the hours she put down. When the aid was present and the same question was asked, his response was totally unexpected. He said he had approved her putting the hours she puts months ago. I was so hurt and upset. I packed as much as I could and I left. Now he wont let me get the rest of my belongings nor will he answer the phone or door so I can get the rest of my things. I know their are certain laws that protect him. I am at such a loss. I am so hurt at his actions. I have been with this man 11 years before his wreck and been sole care provider the past 4 years. Another women not a paid aid has stepped in and tells me the police say I have to go through her to set up time to get the rest of my things and turn over to her everything and all documents I may have pertaining to him. I don't want to go to jail but I be damned if I will concur with her demands. What can I do?

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I agree about the lawyer. You also need a police escort when you go to pick up your belongings. All paperwork should go from the lawyer to the ex. No go betweens. I would no longer consider him a fiance. 11 years is a long time for an engagement. You have been a good person just sorry u spent 11yrs of ur life with him. Time to move on and good luck.
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Since they want every document pertaining to him, I would make all copies of what you have and keep it in a very safe place. Just in case, someone decides to accuse you of negligence. One doesn't know that when you give ALL documents to them, they can accuse you - and you have NO back up documents to prove that you did this or that.

Due to the HIPAA law, you can tell them that you just can't give these documents to just anyone. Insist that they present to you their POA document or any other document notarized that they are acting in behalf of him. I think the police and the medical community would understand why you don't want to release such sensitive documents to just to anyone.

IF the police will be there so that you can retrieve your belongings - remember this - they will ASK the homeowner if you can enter and retrieve your stuff. The homeowner can say No. If he does, then your only recourse is through the small claims court. By then, if I was a spiteful caregiver, I'd make sure your stuff gets 'lost.' At the small claims court, you will need to have proof that you own those things.
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The request to work with her to get your things back and to turn over documents seems very sensible. You probably won't need the documents in the future, since they are about him. If you want your property, it seems a good thing to do.

I'm surprised that it blew up like this. There must have been problems before this happened.
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Lostwill, please correct me if I am wrong, but this one situation does not sound like a reason to leave. Could it be that this was the straw that broke the camels back? Are you simply exhausted and worn out from taking care of him?
I am not asking these questions to upset you, I am asking because it seems your leaving has much more behind it than his not being honest about the hours the aide worked or charged for....
Please take some time to really get in touch with what is going on... if you want to stay gone, then do so , by all means.... I don't know the law on getting your things... I do know you can call for an assist with the police, for them to standby while you get the rest of your things.... don't know who this woman is that you spoke of, but don't allow yourself to be bullied.... call the police and find out what you can do....
I am sorry you took care of this man all this time and it has ended this way.. prayers for you to take care of yourself....
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Is your fiance competent? Is this other woman you have to deal with his guardian? Did you receive legal notice of charges, claims or eviction? There are laws in each state regarding these matters. I would consult with an attorney to explore my rights and obligations.

Asking your finance the question about the hours in front of the care aid may have put him on the spot. People who are dependent on others have a difficult time when confronting the very people who they depend upon. I can see how he might have felt he had to say what he did, even if it wasn't the truth. Or perhaps there was a miscommunication. But, whatever it was, it looks like things are much different now. I would get legal advice to see what has transpired and how you could be legally evicted from a place you were staying without notice and proper service.

Is there a restraining order?

Is sounds like a very odd situation.
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sorry, missed a portion of it. My eyes. You left. HOORAY!!!
However, the rest I stand by: after 11 years, he is not a fiance. You are something else which I will not say here. You are trying to get back on track.
You are going to have to cut your losses in my opinion: being unmarried you will not have the same rights as if you had the marriage contract.
but kudos for leaving. You may very well try asking police for help but I am afraid you are on the losing end.
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After 11 years you don't have a key to his house? Have you mingled your funds? Bought things together? That alone tells you something about your relationship. If that was your primary residence, he cannot just lock you out at will. Check with the police on your rights or even a lawyer or legal aid might be better to ask. I hate to say it but sounds as if your fiance may be the victim of some sort of coercion or brainwashing by these two women. Do you not know this other woman? After 11 years I cannot believe you wouldn't know everyone in his life. If she has just come into the picture this sounds very suspicious and I would maybe request the police also do a wellness check on your fiance as well. This aid may be running some sort of scam and your fiance doesn't have the strength to fight it..
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Here we go again... answering a post, with little information, and no comments from the OP...... if this is legitimate, good, if not... please come back and say you were just bored and needed entertaining..... It's really a simple request.. we are busy, tired, exhausted, unhealthy, and yes, bored.... but we care for each other here and you got many great suggestions.... from people who CARE..... the least you can do is come back and let us know we were fooled again.... you'd think we would be used to it by now... but no, it just p*sses me off.
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And she Never even came back to thank all of the people who gave a few moments of their precious time to let us know how she is doing. That's just great!
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