We don't want to get involved with Medicaid. Any financial assistance?

Medicaid is an Issue if family is counting on an inheritance.

I got va benefits for my mom in 3 months. She now gets 1149 a month to help pay for care. If you check my about me page you will find my blog site where I showed the steps I took to get claim done so quickly.

Medicaid is the 'grant'. Why is Medicaid an issue? In Indiana if she brings in $2199 or less she can own a car and a house and still qualify for Medicaid Waiver benefits, like in home care or Structured Family Caregiving, where a relative or friend can be paid to deliver service while living with her.

Kannie, if the Federal and State government had financial benefits to give to those who are caring for parents/inlaws/aunts/uncles/spouse/siblings/children then all States would be bankrupted within months.

Please use Medicaid, that is why it is there, to help take care of those who cannot afford to take care of themselves, for whatever reason.

Betty - Structured Family Caregiving is a MEDICAID waiver program. The original poster does not want to utilize Medicaid. Not much in the way of government assistance that will not either require recovery from the elder's assets (before or after death) or explanation of financial activities over the last 5 years. Since Medicaid is available to offset costs, most nursing homes don't offer cost reductions due to family not wanting to use it.

Another alternative is to have her live with one of you, and use her money to hire a caregiver at about $18 to $20 /hr. $2000 per month would give you about 3 to 4 hours per day of a caregiver.

freqflyer some state governments like MA, CT, RI, LA, KS, and IN, to name a few, do provide financial benefits to give to those who are caring for parents/inlaws/aunts/uncles/siblings/children. In Indiana it is called Structured Family Caregiving and the states are not going broke because it is about 1/2 the cost of putting someone in a nursing home, so it is SAVING the states money and helping people to stay in the community longer.

VA Aid and Attendance if she or your Dad was a veteran during a war. We were able to help our Mom to get it and it's very close to $1200. You can find out about it on va.gov.

I think there are exceptions for children who live in the house and care for the parents for several years before they apply. I would get expert legal advice on it, before I took someone's word on it. I would find an Elder Law attorney in your state that knows the rules and can give you a concrete answer on whether you meet any exceptions.

Kannie - you wrote that your mom's name is on the deed as well as yours. So if that is the case, it is not your home. Her ownership would be 1/3 unless there was an agreement differently at the time of purchase and recorded at courthouse. And then mom deeded her share to you 2 years ago. If this is the situation, if mom applies for Medicaid there will be a transfer penalty for her share of the ownership that she gifted to you 2 years ago. All real property sales & transfers are recorded and there is no way around Medicaid finding out about the transfer. I assume that this is why you are wanting to find a program to pay for her care that does not involve Medicaid, isn't that the situation?

It sounds like you have been paying 100% of the mortgage as well? Unless you have a legal agreement as to how the mortgage was to be credited to you against her or her estate, it doesn't matter that she paid zero on the mortgage. The mortgage holder doesn't care who pays it as long as it is paid. Ditto for tax assessor, insurance companies, etc. If you are paying for things, you need an agreement as to the terms on payments made or costs incurred.

Really in my experience, your options are limited:
- continue to take for her for whatever period of time takes you all beyond the 5 year mark so no transfer penalty, then apply for Medicaid to pay for her care either at home on some waiver in-home service or at a NH
- apply for Medicaid now and work with an attorney to get the caregiver exemption done so that the transfer of the property is viewed as within the exclusion to estate recovery by Medicaid.
- apply for Medicaid now and deal with the transfer penalty. If the house is low value, 1/3 may not be all that much and hopefully the NH will work out a payment option. If you are running out of caregiving ability, it could come to this. If you have significant costs spent that could lower her share, the transfer penalty could be reduced as well - speak with an attorney as to this possibility.
- you quit claim the property back to her, apply for Medicaid get her into a NH and deal with MERP - estate recovery of her 1/3 of the house when she finally dies.

Whatever the choice, you need good legal advise on how to do any of this so that the costs on the house you are paying for are in some way credited to you whether now or later. It's hard and not pretty choices to be made for all. Good luck