Does living rent free count as my pay?

Like all others in this arrangement, it is unsustainable and unethical. Give written 1-week notice today and then leave (even if you have to couch surf with a friend or family member for a while).

The son won't like it but who cares? When he has to step in and do what you're doing he may decide to place her in a facility. Check the labor laws in CA that pertain to caregivers. If what he's been doing breaks any laws, let him know that, too. You don't have a legal case against him since there's no written contract and no money trail. You literally have nothing to lose...you're not getting paid so just leave. NEVER enter this type of employment arrangement again, as you can see that it has robbed you in more ways than one. ALWAYS get a written employment contract for a private hire. I wish you all the best moving forward!

You are being used and abused, why on earth have you put up with it for 3 years?

https://www.dir.ca.gov/dlse/DomesticWorkerBillOfRights-FAQ.html

https://www.care.com/homepay/resource-center/requirements-by-state/california

https://www.trustontrial.com/2017/02/california-wage-and-hour-lawsuits-spreading-to-moms-living-room/

NO! NO! NO!
It is not legal to have you work for no pay.
I hope that the caregiver that was hired and quit because of no pay is talking to the Labor Board, or a Labor Attorney.
You can also not work 24/7 you need breaks and days off. That is the law.
Since you have access to a computer search the state labor laws on how many hours and days you can work. And there should be information on a live in situation.
4 -5 years ago when I was paying caregivers I paid them $12.00 an hour.
Taxes were taken out and reported.
(I think at this time I would probably pay $15.00 but I would have to do a bit of searching to be sure, this is just off the top of my head.)
I hope your "employer" is properly reporting your wages so it does not later effect your Social Security AND any reporting is done so that the IRS does not come after you later. That is IF you are getting any payment at all.
A quick search I found this.
Live in caregiver wages are between $12.00 and $25.00 per HOUR
Another source Average pay is $687 per WEEK.
And you can not work 24 hours you need time off and if you work more than the legal number of hours (check your state) you MUST be paid overtime.

PLEASE do not let this family abuse you any more PLEASE talk to a Labor Attorney or go to your Labor Board.

Let me get this straight. You are working for free for someone who is NOT your family member? You made an agreement to move in and in exchange for rent you are there 24/7, in charge of all care and of hiring and firing, but you are not employed by the family of this 95 year old?
There is something strange about this picture. My fear is that this person will die, and you not only will have ZERO money, but also no job history, no money and will be homeless. We actually often see this when family members take on this kind of care. The house goes to medicaid clawback and they go to a homeless shelter.
Do follow the advice in some comments below. As you have lived here even albeit rent free and caring for someone you can under California law, at least, be considered a tenant, so it will not be easy to kick you out without tenant relocation stipend of some amount, but otherwise, upon the death of the person you are providing care for voluntarily, you will be on your own. I am wishing you good luck in addressing this, but it is 3 years after the fact; short of serving notice and moving I cannot imagine what you can do.

No. Living rent free does not count as pay. It counts as slavery or indentured servitude and neither all allowed anymore.

The minimum pay for any job in this country is minimum wage. Live-ins do not get paid by the hour though. Live-ins are also supposed to get time off. A day off for a live-in is 24 hours. That means they can go and do whatever they like and someone else stays with the client.

Why would you or the other caregiver ever have agreed to a job that has no wages? Or were the two of you expecting pay and never received it? If such is the case get the son in trouble with the state of California and walk away from this job.
My friend, let me give you a good piece of advice if you're planning on staying in the field of in-home caregiving. I apologize if it's long-winded.
Never allow the wages to ever be paid late or short. There must be the Understanding between the caregiver and the people who pay him/her. The Understanding are rules agreed upon with the caregiver and the employer. The rules do not even have to be in writing if you're getting paid in cash. They give their word and you give yours.
The Understanding I've always had with any client or family I took work with is this.

1) I work a schedule. There is no staying later or visiting or anything else. If I agree to cover for another caregiver on the same job then fine. If there's an emergency and I'm available then I'll agree to go to the client after my hours. I always get paid for it.

2) I do not take calls from clients or their families after hours. I let them all go to voicemail. If someone was making a cancellation or it's an emergency, I'd call them right back. I always made myself very clear that I don't take client calls after hours because they just want to talk. I will not take a call from a family member asking me if I could "just go and check on them". Or asking if I'll just talk to the client on the phone because they're bored or lonely.
It's the job of the family to check on them after hours or to take their calls when they're lonely and bored.

3) The Pay. Every care job I've ever worked the people responsible for paying knew they need to always make sure I'm paid on time, in the full amount with no exceptions. Every Friday there'd be a receipt for whoever was paying me with my dates of the week, my hours, and the wages I'm owed. Clients able to pay me themselves did so at the end of my week in person. If a family member was doing the paying, often they'd leave my check and we worked on an honor system that way. Or I'd leave my receipt and a check would be left in its place when I came Monday morning to work. Naturally in the course of many years doing in-home care, sometimes on private jobs something would come up and my pay wouldn't be there. Usually the people paying me would call to explain and apologize. I allowed a one time, two-day grace period for them to pay me in full. It was understood if anyone tried to get cute or stiff me on my money, that I'd get in my car and drive away, leaving their "loved one" to fend for themselves. I never had to make good on that threat. The threat alone was enough and I always got paid. In private care jobs when people know you mean business, they treat you as such. Don't ever let any client or family take advantage of you even one time because it will never just be one time. It will be every time.

Yes, you should be getting paid. I'm shocked that you aren't be paid. When I looked into round-the-clock care for my mother, it was $11K per month, believe it or not, about the same as a nursing home. Four different people would stay with her in 6 hour shifts at $16/hour. And that was three years ago.

I would think that at least something, say, $3000 a month would be fair. When this woman passes, you will have nothing to show for your time in caring for her -- unless you are independently wealthy. If she passes tomorrow, where will you stay and how will you find the funds to move on?

If I was you I would be making alternate arrangements as this is slave labour if she was to die tomorrow where does that leave you?

You live there so yes free rent is pay. You are getting room and board for services rendered. I'm caregiver for my mother but yes legally you are being paid. I would think a salary should come with it as well. Doesn't always happen but u cannot be cash poor when caring for someone. Is there a weekly cash house allowance or perdium to cover expenses that come up? Anyone not living there would need to be paid another way since free rent is not option for them and few ppl want place to stay for only a month. Totally understand burn out!
I get state funded respite for 2 weeks a year where my mother goes into facility to be cared for and I get the house to myself for a couple weeks. May I suggest looking into this type of service. I also pay small copay for 30hrs of caregiver help per week. Due to pandemic my first respite in 2years is coming up. Can barely wait. Good luck to you.🙂

My dad has live-in caregiver. Paid $3500 a month. Yes you should get paid. Get a notebook and write down everything you do for this poor woman. Date time activity etc. Do you do grocery shopping? Bring to doctors? Record all!! Laundry? Cleaning house? Attach a monetary value to each episode. This does not equal free rent. Get out as soon as you can!!

How could you hire someone when you aren't the one who is paying?

24/7 labor in exchange for room and board is slavery, which is frowned upon in most societies.

Some napkin math says you've provided over $300,000 worth of free labor. Start charging ASAP or get a job. You'll be on the streets if this lady drops dead tomorrow unless you're wealthy.

Leave.

Along these same lines, I am wondering if there is a difference between this situation presented here, and if the caregiver/personal attendant is actually a family member providing these services as a 24/7 live in?

Also, if you are a caregiver/personal attendant, is it reasonable to expect that you should also clean the house, water the garden, pull weeds, trim bushes, take the garbage out, cook, shop for food, pay for food and household supplies?

You are a domestic slave. You should be getting paid as well as free room and board. Your duties should be spelled out in a contract. You should have "time off." Please notify the authorities. When you do, the woman you cared for will be placed in a facility and you should receive help from social services to find another living and working option.

My mil had a live in caregiver for 12 out of every 14 days. The kids would take care of her the other two days. He got paid $150 a day and this was in 2012. He drove her places, made sure she took her meds, cooked and cleaned and provided someone to talk to. We would prepay for the 12 days; when she died he tried to repay the overage but we told him to keep it as a form of severance.

My heart always sinks when I read these stories—- her son has been exploiting you I’m sorry to tell you, this is a travesty. When a client requires a caregiver to live in— as you describe he NEEDS the caregiver to live there —- when a client requires a live in, they can NOT count where you sleep in any amount toward your salary - he cannot count it as even part of your salary- you are living as basically an indentured servant, you haven’t earned anything monetarily towards your personal needs or towards your savings. What if she dies tomorrow you would be out of a job with zero savings to fall back on. The son sounds like a real piece of work, what a jerk people like him enjoy treating others in a demeaning manner. Please protect yourself, ( personally I wouldn’t consider working for him anymore even if he decides to pay you he has showed you his true nature to exploit others) but if you want to try and stay the only way you should consider it is to sit down with him asap and I would consider having a friend or support person w you, and let him know you have learned that you can’t work for free any longer- I would phrase it that way, and mention you’ve learned by the way that when a client needs the caregiver ( also applies to nannies) to live in the room you sleep in can’t be counted towards pay, and that you will only be able to go forward if he pays you for this month NOW and will expect to be paid on the first of next month. If he declines inform him you’ll be having to leave in 24 hours and follow through is my advice. If 24 hours feels harsh then think about how harsh it is for you to work for free- you have been paid nothing for 24/7 caregiving by this man— he didn’t have any concern for you this entire time. He has a choice so don’t get suckered into a sob story by him that he needs time to find someone else—- he already has you- he simply like any employer needs to cough up payment and he won’t have to worry about hiring someone else. Phew what a huge jerk— I’m not in the least surprised the other caregiver quit after two months. Pls think of how unfair this is to you and practically speaking, a bed to sleep in doesn’t cover your personal costs and doesn’t reflect the value and importance of caring for a high need senior 7 days a week! If you walk out today he will have a hard time finding anyone to do that - anyone who initially does will likely quit in short amount of time. Live in caregivers earn 20 plus an HOUR. The bed you sleep in doesn’t count. Sorry for the long reply but I’m always incensed at entitled people like him who exploit others

A Live in usually gets paid a small amount while getting Room And Board.
They also get one 24 hr day off so a replacement should be hired for that 24 hr period.
You really need to renegotiate with your Employer the Terms of your Live In.
If Employer does not come to a satisfied agreement with you, give your Notice to quit.

Also, Employer and you should each sign a paper listing what is expected from each other and the amount if time off and pay, ect.

I found an Agency that would furnish 24 7 Live In care for $500 a week but I don't know what they would be paying their Employee who would actually be living in.
I do know the Live In is expected to have an 8 hr sleep per night, a Bedroom, bathroom and meals plus 1 day (24 hrs) off a week.

Call a meeting with the womans son and explain to him that you can no longer live there 24/7 for free.  Tell him you need to come to some sort of agreement that includes a salary and specific days off, during which time he will have to have a second caregiver for his mom on your days off.  NO ONE WORKS 24/7 for room and board.  Do the math.  I don't live in California so I don't know what an apartment would cost in your area, but for easy math, lets say a 1 bdrm apartment cost $1,000 per month.  There are 672 hours in a month, so divide $1,000 by 672 = $1.48.  You are working for a $1.48 per hour.  That is insane and he is taking advantage of you...probably to save his inheritance.  Tell him your requirements of a salary in addition to room and board and your required days off and if he refuses, have a letter of resignation ready.  Give him appropriate time to find a replacement and for you to find other accommodations.  No more than a month.  Once he starts checking around to see what it is going to cost him, he will see the error of his ways!

California has very strict laws about this. I believe that they would say that the "room/board" was at your employers convenience and that as an "on call" employee, you are entitled for overtime etc. You are also eligible for workers compensation, unemployment insurance and you (and your employer will have to pay into social security)....etc etc.

As SAHM for many years, I remember my Dh once reading about how much he'd have to pay me if I were a salaried employee. It was about $60K per year, at that time, ( mid 80's) almost as much as DH was making in the workforce. It shocked him to the core--but this article spread out all the stuff a SAHM DOES!! Meals, dishes, laundry, child care, cleaning (and cleaning and cleaning) chauffeuring kids & him, being a FT nurse on many occasions, bookkeeper, shopping for gifts, keeping up a yard and then snow removal, car maintenance...I could go on, but you get it. IF he had to pay separately for all those things, he couldn't afford to live!

My daughter lives in CA. Her rent is $3000 a month. She MAKES about $10K a month.

While I realize she's highly trained and educated...she's still paying $3K for her rent. So your 'rent' is about that, or less. You should be making $20 an hour beyond what the free rent is. And it should be run through an accountant, taxes and SS paid.

Daughter works a typical 40 hr week. You work much more. And you have no time off? Wow, these people saw you coming!

Find another place to go & another job then confront them with your demands. If they say 'no' then tell them goodbye and start anew.

Seems harsh, but you are being taken advantage of, big time.

Imho, whatever your arrangement was with the son of this elderly lady something has gone afoul.

I'm inclined to think this was a good arrangement for you 3 years ago. Perhaps you needed a place to live and the lady needed help. Maybe the agreement was for your food, misc needs, or paying some bills for you? There had to be an agreement for the arrangement, and seemed to be a good deal for you at the time, considering you've done it for 3 years. No one, even those who have food/housing paid for can go three years without a dime in their pocket - so assuming there's a little cash here and there. I just think there is more detail.

At any rate, no one says you have to stay there. You refer to 'the ladies son', so assuming you aren't related to the lady or the son. Give the son notice - say a month - and tell him you can't do it alone and no longer want the deal you made in the beginning. Even long term employees at a company ask for raises from time to time. See what he offers. If not acceptable, move on your notice of departure date. End of story.

When you have a 'normal' job your pay is greater than the cost of your apartment or house. Plus you have money to pay other bills, go out to dinner, go on a vacation.
So----NO you are not being paid enough.
I would decide what you neeed (time off, respite care, etcc)then have a professional talk with the son. Get something in writing.
Is it time to tell the son that his mother really needs the supervision of cared nursing facility?
Good luck to you. Be STRONG, be BOLD!

No one should work 24 hours a day and 7 days a week.
Especially if you are not being paid. I doubt your situation is legal.
Please, please do not continue to do this, you are being treated like a slave.
You need money for your own life, and future
This is so upsetting to read, please look after yourself

I believe you should be paid as well. If she were in a facility she would have to pay $3500 to $6000+ a month. So find out what her cost would be and what you would pay for rent. Does she buy all the food? Does she pay when you take her to the dr? To go get groceries, anything for her? List is all what you do. You shouldn't look at it as your living there rent free, look as you are a live in care giver. People pay for that and they pay well bc its hard to find good care for the elderly. YOU NEED TO BE PAID!

I knew a caregiver who got free room and board in the home of the wealthy elderly person she cared for 24/7. She was paid $60,000 plus social security. She tidied, but there was a housekeeper and handyman to manage the house. If you’re in the right location and good at your job, expect to be paid accordingly.

I pay an agency $96 for four hours ($24 an hour) of care twice a week for my husband who has dementia. She does cognitive therapy with him including puzzles, play cards, etc., no household chores.

The agency I use charges $340 for 24 hours. The caregiver must have eight hours of free time during the 24 (so she can rest or do whatever she wants).

Twenty years ago, my mom and dad paid their live-in caregiver $120 a day plus room and board.

As others have said, you need to be paid!!!!

I have interviewed for a similar situation in Ca. 5 days a week. Free room and board plus $25/hr

Until someone actually has to contract a Home Health & Caregiver, the cheapest relatives would count living in a spare bedroom with a roof over your head as a compensation for care giving. What they really don't understand are the other intangibles to an uncompensated 24/7 Caregiver. The errands, whatever life management for an estate. A pet that needs care as well. I find out real fast at the end that how cheap & selfish others can be. See you'll ruin your career, society won't work with you to jump start your career when it's over. I had 2 brothers that pulled that with me. And 3 years later, well, you see what the pandemic was all about. Reboots into low ball income with no benefits & mismanaged poverty. That's if that is even the goal. Cheap on the pandemic relief is exactly what you'll get as Caregiver.

Do the math, 24 x20/hr is $ 480 a day. $ 20/hr is what a home health would charge. And Home Health isn't cooking meals, isn't maintaining a household. They're just collecting vitals & monitoring. $ 480/day for 365 days and that's $ 175,200 gross. Show me any bedroom on the planet that costs that much for you to rent for that for a year of your life. For that matter, show me a caregiver that is compensated that much, ever ? Quite often a house or other assets would need to be bought & paid for, liquidated to pay a Home Health group to pay for that level of care. In effect, you're saving the estate for an inheritance to beneficiaries that won't divy up the workload. This is what I found out about the human race & what life all about. Don't get me wrong, what I did for last remaining parent & dog was a burden I would do again. I'd do it differently though this time.

You are being robbed. Contact INSS in your county. If that does not exist- call elder abuse. If she does not have the money the state should pay. You are owed 3 years of back pay! Get it and buy yourself a home!