Does durable POA allow me to move Mom from assisted living?

Unless she is declared legally incompetent she is free to make her own decisions and your POA only allows you to carry out her wishes.
OK now what if the state takes this to court? Let's say the judge finds her incompetent and in need of 24/7 care. The judge can go so far as to remove all POA's and appoint an independent guardian for her.
I say let her stay where she is. She may have told you she was unhappy there only to get you to pay more attention to her. Very common. I hate to tell you how many people have taken their parents home only to find the complaining gets worse.

Oddly I see nowhere here where mom has asked to move or said she was unhappy. It reads more like Carla feels she would be happier in carla's home.She says mom was agreeable, not that it was Mom's idea. Maybe mom is afraid to hurt your feelings carla, and she really is happy where she is?

Your mom has dementia? And you want to take her home? Were you her caregiver before she went to ALF?

Carla, have you taken care of other Alzheimer's relatives in the past? Or will this be your first rodeo? With the Assisted Living, the Staff has been on many many rodeos and know exactly what to do whenever an Alzheimer's related situation pops up.

There must be more to this situation since the Assisted Living facility called in the State. The ALF normally wouldn't care if a tenant had moved, as there is always someone on the waiting list who wants to move in.

As time goes on and the dementia gets worse Mom will not be getting better care in you home if you are the sole caregiver. It just is not possible to do 24/7 on your own for an extended period.
Why did she go to ALF in the first place? If she wants to stay she has clearly settled in which is a great situation to be in. Moving her again will cause great upset for no good purpose unless this is financially driven and you are hoping to protect an inheritance.

Step back and take a long, hard, objective look at your mother's needs. Chances are that you will regret moving her. Leave her be. And no, you do not have the right to move her against her wishes just to give it a try. She is not an experiment.

Her Alzheimers could have made her agree to the move as well.

Have you lived with your mother recently, Carla?

If mother is totally incompetent to make her own decisions I fear she is past the point where she could be cared for by one person in a private home.

If she is not legally incompetent, then she gets to decide where to live. If she likes where she is, leave her be!!

Bringing her home as an experiment is, in my mind, thoughtless at best, cruel at worst.

As we said in my youth, help your mother bloom where she is planted now.

Carlashaw, looking over our answers it may seen that we are a little harsh. I want to clarify that I don't suspect your motives and that it is wonderful of you to be willing to take on the care of your mother in your home. I'm sure this seems like the right thing to do from your perspective. I don't mean to be criticizing you personally.

Many of us have first hand experience with this kind of thing. Good intentions and wonderful motives do not overcome the challenges of demenita.

If you have stated your plans to remove your mother and your mother has complained about this to the staff, they may feel an obligation to see that she is not "kidnapped" -- which is what taking a competent adult against her will would be.

And, no, POA does not give you authority over the person. See this good article about the role of the POA: https://www.agingcare.com/articles/things-you-can-and-cant-do-with-poa-152673.htm

I know that your heart is in the right place. I don't mean this as a criticism of you, but please, leave your mother where she is happy.

Carla,
Moving Day can be delayed?

Have you moved her out of ALF yet? If the facility is against the idea of her moving out and she doesn't want to move out.....I would not go against it. In fact, if she is still competent. It's not your decision to make.

Most people do not comprehend the level of care that is needed in the home for a dementia patient. And the fact that the time, energy, expense, etc. increasing over time.

I suppose after you get her home the reality will sink in and then you can make other arrangements if needed.

With most Assisted Living facilities, I bet Carla had to give 30 days notice of moving, and I wouldn't be surprised if a new tenant will be moving in shortly. Thus this does create quite a problem.

Carla, if you can, please come back on-line and give us some answers to our question so we will have a better understanding what is going on. We really do need more information.

On second thought Carla may have a point about her mom. She may have concerns of the place her mom is in, and how they are caring for her.

zytrhr, then Carla could move her Mom to another Memory Care facility. Bringing her Mom home isn't a good idea unless Carla has hired numerous caregivers to help her out. And that would cost more than Memory Care.

Please note not every Assisted Living and Nursing Homes is terrible, as I have seen you posted. So please don't keep using such a wide brush to paint them all as the same.

I have the opposite problem. Mom has MCI w/short-term memory loss (as diagnosed by her PCP and neurologist as recently as last April). Mom now has CNAs 24/7 in the home. She can't walk without a walker, and with her high fall risk, someone has to walk right behind her to catch her if she stumbles or needs to sit down (we have chairs ready for trip between the sitting room and bathroom). Brother is insisting Mom should be moved to a NH or ALF near where he lives (3 hours from Mom), and makes it clear he thinks the POA gives him the right to do it. I live 400 miles from Mom in the other direction, but visit her for a week or more once a month. I have the CNAs only 3 hours in the morning during my visits, to get her out of bed, bathed dressed, breakfast, etc. so I can get a few hours to jog or go for a walk. My visits exhaust me, since I'm cooking most of the day to fill her freezer, doing all the CNA duties, including getting up with her 4 or more times during the night. I would not recommend removing your mother with Alzheimers from the facility. Her condition will only get worse. At this stage (my Mom is 96), I think a move to a facility would make her more confused and unhappy. Am going to fight brother to keep her at home.

Carla- if you're still out there and you've got a minute, can you give a quick up-date? I hope things are going well for you and your mother.

Dementia patients often need physical therapy to help their bodies remember how to walk, get out of bed without falling, go to the bathroom. (I hope you don't have a second floor - falls down a flight of stairs, even if they were going upstairs for no reason). If they feel they need to "escape", they can disappear in an instant, leaving you with having to put an all points bulletin out for her. Hopefully they won't take the car and end up in another state, in an accident, as my relative did. They can become agitated and violent one minute, sweet as a little baby the next. You would basically have to give up your life - 24 hour/day round the clock care can be exhausting - and nothing less is responsible. These are adults with childish minds and little sense of danger or common sense. My grand dad used to turn all the stove pilots on - he had a stove that needed matches to light it. His daughter caretaker was in the bathroom off the kitchen, taking a bath, when she smelled the gas, got out of the tub, wrapped a towel around herself and rushed out - right into the gas cloud, which made her pass out. Almost killed both of them, except my grand-dad knew she needed help right away and he ran to the close by neighbors help. The outcome could have been much worse. ALF's are not home, for sure, but they know how to deal with dementia, have 24 hour care, and the way to ensure your mom has company and is being taken care of is to go there and visit, and give her some one on one care that the staff cannot do because they have many clients to care for.

Carla
Why do you believe she will get better care in your home, are you unhappy with the ALF? There is a lot to consider. How far advanced is she in the disease - Alzheimer's is a progressive disease and she will get worse. Will you have any help; what if something happens to you?

I cared for my mother for 2 years and recently placed her in an Memory Care unit. To this day, I still second guess myself - should I have waited, should I have cared for her longer. A five day stay in the hospital followed with back surgery was a real eye opener for me and I am relatively pretty fit and healthy for my age. You never know what can happen to you in life.

Being a caregiver is 24/7; your life as you know it will end. If she wants to stay, I would let her stay. That is probably why the ALF contacted the state. My mom attended adult day care while I went to work, but sometimes she would refuse to go, she started to wander, and would refuse any type of home health care. You really don't know how this will impact your personal life until you have done it. Changing her routines and moving her may also cause agitation.

Also, if you ever want to place her again, most ALF's have waiting lists. I would think this through and get more advice before making any decisions.

Elvis has left the building. I'm betting Carla was a little taken back with the replys and probably none too happy with them as well. Anyhoo - whatever she decided, I hope its working out for her and her mother. As many of us know, sometimes there is no good solution- just a lesser of evils.

I agree with Carla because my Mom was in an undesirable ALF. I moved her back to her house about 3 months ago. I was lucky she had a house to return to. A year ago she stayed in my home for 10 weeks and it was a nightmare. Like me, I imagine Carla wants this stage of her Mom's life to be as happy as possible with loving care. No easy answers but the ALFs in my area do not provide 1:1 care, not even close.