Gospelgirl223 Asked July 2015
How to deal with grocery shopping issues?
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Of course, you could also say to her that if she knows of a better personal shopper she is welcome to use that person for her grocery services; but something tells me you are too kind for that. Do at some point get round to reminding her, though, that being constantly distracted by phone calls and put under pressure to hurry is not conducive to efficient marketing. I.e., if she would only back off a bit you might be able to do a better job. But I wouldn't put any money on her actually paying attention to this fairly obvious point.
Shoulder rubs to you. This caregiving business does try the patience.
I was always taught that beggars can't afford to be choosers, and that applies to the needy elders as well. I don't think you would be out of line to tell your Aunt: "If you're not satisfied with my grocery shopping, I won't mind if you get someone else to do it."
There's also the possibility of Meals on Wheels. There are a variety of dishes; obviously not everyone is going to like some of the meals, but at $3 per meal in our area, it's cheaper than taxi fare and a comparable amount of groceries. In addition, there's the obvious value of companionship as the volunteers are friendly people, like seniors, and seem to provide a treat for homebound elders.
This would significantly lessen your grocery shopping obligations.
Instead of an expensive taxi, check to see if there are any senior transport services in the area. Some transit companies offer door to door service for much less than a taxi.
Like many elders, your aunt probably doesn't remember everything she needs or wants or make lists. It happens. Just tell her sweetly that it's an opportunity to come back again and help her out. Perhaps she just wants attention - that's not unusual for an older person.
The longer term concept is twofold:
(1) Keep your shopping lists, create a database in Excel of what she buys and the frequency. Add it to a checklist and ask her when you create your lists for that week if she needs any of those items.
(2) Check her frig, cupboards and wherever else she stores food to see if anything's low, then be proactive and confirm with her that she needs it, then add it to the list.
Sounds like you got great advice and the online grocer thing is a good idea. I also think that Kroger based grocers also offer this service.
You need to order $60 worth of groceries each time.... if that's too much, then you can order once every two weeks. The home delivery will bring in the groceries into the house.
Of course my Mom will grumble if I order something that has new packaging... "that's not the item I wanted".... "yes it is, same stuff, new packaging".... "the product code is different" [Mom knows her scanner product codes].... "yes, new packaging, new product code". Then later in the week I will hear "it tasted funny".... [rolling eyes].
The other day my Dad mentioned that Mom [97] and I [69]should go back to how we use to shop, me driving Mom to the store and we shop together. EKKKKKKK. That's not happening. That ship sailed a year ago.
Plus I am grounded do to my own age decline where I fell and got injured. Can't drive or shop with a broken shoulder :P But I can use a computer !!