How to deal with grocery shopping issues?

Grocery shopping is one thing mom still enjoys doing. I give her a list on a post it with 5 or 6 items (spaced throughout the store) and put mom in an electric cart and she is off. Then I have a list which I do with another electric cart (if available) or just pushing the regular one. Not a time saver but mom really enjoys chatting with people, getting others to help her and seeing folks she has not seen in a while.

Mom would really prefer that I make a menu a week a head but I just can't do it...it is not my style but also making the list and then keeping to it is a real problem too. (not a restaurant). I guess she always wants to know what is for dinner because that is a highlight....shopping is the same way...

Trying to change an older person's opinion, preference or decision is often a futile game. When I find myself tempted to argue my point, I realize that doing so will not work. Arguing with them can be seen as a sign of disrespect-even if you are right. Stepping outside one's self is a critical skill and one that most people can master.

glasshalffull, oh good glad I am not the only one out there who doesn't plan a week's menu for meals. It's pretty much me opening up the refrigerator door and staring into the refrigerator... opening up the pantry and doing the same.... same with the freezer. And I am still baffled on what to prepare. Bowl of cereal, anyone?

Too bad we don't have a "Like" option on here for responses! I LOVE these suggestions! !! Thanks everyone!

Gospelgirl, just check the "Helpful Answer" at the bottom of each posting - that's essentially the "Like" button and the easiest way to do it.

You can also check the "like" button when the various posts appear in your "News Feed" category in the "My Account section on the upper right hand side of the page.

Guess what happened today? I went to the store, following many of the suggestions that were given to me earlier. I wondered why Aunty had not called me the whole time. I called her and got no answer, so I figured she was taking a nap. When I got home, she was sitting on the edge of the couch, complaining that I forgot to give her the house phone before I left. (This morning, I had to recharge it because it was dead.) She said that she was trying to get to her cell phone but couldn't reach it.(POA had visited yesterday, and had hid the phone from the 18-month old when he tried to throw it at his brother).

(Posted too fast again) It wasn't funny, but I did laugh to myself a bit).

I agree with jude...sometimes you gotta lie a little. Online grocrry shopping then telling mom youre going out to shop and giving yourself a much needed break i a good idea. My mom would get insistsnt on one brand or another but as funds were limited i would buy in bulk and place the product in her old usual brand shampoo bottle...she nevrr knew the difference but saving her money and my sanity allowed me to be a better caregiver...versus the rsving lunitic caregiving can make you become.

Gospel Girl
Congrats on the successful shopping trip!
Sometimes the stars do align.

Hi, I don't know how old your Aunt is or if she is able to get out of the house, but my Mom is 90 years old and still very active. I take her shopping once a week. We go to a couple of different stores for the variety of it. Plus she and I like to taste test wine at 2 of the stores we go too. We also have lunch together as it is a me time with her. My Mom has a little bit of short term memory but still drives (only in her area) to a Senior Center everyday. She eats lunch there and plays cards. Once a month she goes on day trips that the Senior Center offers. You might want to look into a Senior Center near her so she has some time to interact with people her own age. Take her shopping with you so she has the opportunity to get out of the house. She may just be looking for your attention and needs you to give her a hug once in a while or just wants for you to sit and listen to her. When she does complain get her on another subject. Have her tell you a story about when she was a little girl and her mother would take her shopping. Or any story. It sounds like that is all she wants is your attention. It is so easy to get frustrated with the elderly, but you have to put yourself in their shoes and think about why she is frustrated. Remember you will be in her shoes one day and you may end up in the same situation and it will be your relative taking care of you. Going over the lists is a convenience for you not her. I don't live with my Mom, but I know going to her house once or twice a week and taking her to dinner or just going over there to help with her house work and spending some time with her really helps cut down on my Mom's complaining. My Mom also has a dog. Elderly people need pets just as much as a child/adult needs them. Companionship is the key. Also from an earlier post with Coconut Oil. Have her take some twice a day. You will be amazed at the difference you will see in her health as well as her attitude. Usually a tsp in the morning and one at night will help her a lot.

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