Dad is going downhill, so his Dr. referred at home hospice care. Is she trying to tell us something?

Why not speak to your dad's doctor directly about what s/he feels is going on with your dad?

But if he's obviously going downhill and losing weight rapidly, sleeping most of the day, then he's likely approaching the end of his life. When there's nothing medically more that can be done for an elder, that's when hospice services are called in to help.

My mother had a friend who lived for 3 years on hospice. But normally, hospice services are called in when the elder is thought to have 6 months or less to live. The person must QUALIFY for hospice also, otherwise Medicare won't pay for it.

People here are making ridiculous/unfounded statements about your dad's doctor 'trying to subtly drop him from her care. Happens all the time.' When a doctor drops a patient, they lose that income generated by the patient as well, which makes NO sense. If this doctor has treated your dad for quite some time, why would you not trust her to have his best interest in mind and simply 'drop him' b/c she wants to get rid of him? That's the ridiculous statement here, imo. The medical people who have cared for both of my parents over the years have truly CARED for them and when it was time to recommend hospice care, they did so with compassion and with good reason. It was because my parents were sick and dying.

In my experience, when an elder is approaching end of life, the last thing that's good for them is to keep going back & forth to the hospital to be poked and prodded and tested with loud MRI machines and needles etc. They should be left in peace & comfort to enjoy their remaining time on Earth. That's the beauty of hospice. My mother was accepted into hospice care yesterday and already they brought her a better wheelchair to try to prevent her many falls. Already they've taken her off of the many vitamins & supplements she's been given daily b/c the nurse feels they're contributing to her chronic nausea. And, at 95, what good is vitamins and supplements ANYWAY?

Wishing you the best of luck getting the answers you seek and understanding what's happening with dad. Peace and prayers sent your way.

Drs don't bandy about the term 'hospice' for the fun of it.

They 'see' things we don't and have far more experience with EOL behavior.

Yes, sit down with Dr and ask whatever ?? you may have. Hospice can be a beautiful, peaceful and HUMANE thing to do.

Hospice care is the kind of care that is delivered at home, with a priority on the patient's comfort. It can mean discontinuing lots of specialist visits, regular lab tests, and other interventions meant to monitor chronic illnesses, slow their progression, and delay complications. (Heart failure, BP and lipid and blood sugar problems, chronic kidney disease, and all the other accumulated chronic conditions. most of us will have in our final decade or so.
Diseases that do occur such as urinary tract infection or chest infection can be treated in hospice, and will be if that is the pt/family choice - but an infection that keeps coming back after oral antibiotics is allowed to progress. If patient can no longer swallow oral medications, the meds are discontinued - not replaced by injections or IV doses.
Hospices do not hasten death...and they know a lot about meds and other interventions to relieve distress/promote comfort. Conversations about medications start at admission, to try to dispel the idea that "hospice gives patients morphine to make them die."
Talk more with the doctor...and talk to a couple of local hospice agencies. The ones that are willing to come see you and your folks and listen to concerns and provide information are much better than the ones that come out with the enrollment forms all filled in for you to sign!
Ask about staff continuity and after hours coverage...a different nurse every two weeks is not good care. An answering service that calls back in a few hours is not good care. (hospice nurse suggestions)

Call the doctor and ask these questions, it’s okay to want a clearer idea of what to expect. Hospice was a great help to my dad and our family, I hope you’ll find the same

Hospice is wonderful. 6 months left to live is what they say qualifies, but many people live longer than that and can stay on if they do. Basically, Hospice just means he is not go get care to make any of his issues better, just keep him comfortable. If he needs surgery or something, he ha to go off it, but can go back on. Don't hesitate to get the doctor's recommendation for your dad to have them come. However, since your mom is not able to do as much now, you may also need to hire another caregiver for him. Hospice will bathe him and get him in his chair and send a nurse once a week, yes, but aren't there many more chores that he needs done for him?

Trust me, I understand your confusion. We are all pretty confused by all of the uncertainties of what may be happening when someone is going through their last months or years. Part of the difficulty is that, really, nobody can say what is going on, exactly. Do get as clear an answer as you can from the doctors, but they are often vague because each case is so different.

My Mom was dying for 3 weeks or 6 months or 10 years, depending on the symptoms, the definitions, and the optimism of the person considering. She lasted longer than anyone predicted and actually enjoyed her failing years more than one might expect. If your Dad qualifies for hospice, go for it. We found the hospice people to be very helpful. The other helpful thing might be to not even try to guess how much time your Dad has.

He could die tomorrow, he could live another couple of years. It depends on what it going on in his body and how strong he is. That strength is not just physical. Mom was unable to lift more than a couple of pounds in her last years (she died at 96), but her ability to withstand disease and disability was astounding. As we all said in her final years, she was "a tough old bird." On the other hand, my Dad, who was strong as an ox died in an instant when he was 62. He was walking across the lawn and simply fell over dead. Try to take some pleasure in remembering good times, looking at photo albums with your Dad, and taking it a day at a time. Do whatever you can to make the journey easier for you both. Hospice sounds like a really good thing for now.

My Husband was on Hospice for almost 3 years.
What Hospice can mean is that given the “normal” course an illness takes, with no intervention a person’s life expectancy is 6 months or fewer.
It also means that a person has reached a point where further treatment will not cure or improve their life. If a person wishes to pursue treatment then Hospice would not be recommended but Palliative care could be.
I think your dad’s doctor has done you and the family a great disservice in not fully explaining the prognosis and the reason or reasons she has recommended Hospice.
With Hospice though your dad will get supplies he needs to be safely cared for at home. Your mom will get support as well. A Nurse will come at least 1 time a week to check him, a CNA will come at least 2 times a week to shower/ bathe him and order supplies. They can also take advantage of other services.
I can honestly say I would not have been able to care for my Husband the way I did if it had not been for Hospice and that Angels that work there.

There is no need to be afraid of Hospice Care. W used it for 15 months during my wife's decline (dementia). She had excellent nursing care with frequent visits, twice weekly baths, a Hoyer lift for bed to chair to bed transfers, respite caregivers for times when I couldn't be there, physician supervision of her care and condition. These are things that are not usually within the reach of a family, but improve the quality of life of the patient and relieve the anxiety of the family.

Why don’t you ask her? She may just have signed you up for palliative care. That doesn’t mean end of life necessarily but just support to make the patient comfortable. I wouldn’t turn it down since it sounds like your mom needs the help to cope. I would be asking his doctor if she thinks he hasn’t got much time left anyway just for your own peace of mind. Hopefully your dad has signed a release so you can speak to her. If not I’d get that in place before much more time passes for both your mom and dad.

IN February this year I went thru same thing with my mom. Hospice is there for the dying but they're also help with palletive care which is comfort. So don't be upset. Everything is alright just means your dad isn't getting any better but he's not dying yet either. Good luck and god bless.