So, finally got mom diagnosed with severe sleep apnea with need for lots of pressure to keep her oxygen level up and airway open.
But due to her confusion, she can't remember how to put the mask on after 6 days! Has to get up multiple times a night to pee so has to take the mask off. Then, party's over. I won't stay up all night dealing with this! I have to sleep at night. I hired (with mom's $) someone to try to help her for the past 2 nights and things are no better than before.
Advice? Are there solutions for confused people? I was hoping her confusion would reduce with the use of the CPAP but if she can't/won't use it, she'll never get good sleep and that will keep her confused. UGHHHHHH
No advice, but I totally hear you! Best of luck!
So sorry that your mom gave up! I am so hopeful that this does not happen to me. She lives with me and the tiredness and confusion obviously have a huge impact on her behavior and our relationship.
I can't imagine a confused elder would ever really adjust to such a thing and wonder why it was prescribed in the first place. You can't expect her to manage it, nor can you stay up all night yourself managing it FOR her. Send it back and let the chips fall where they might with your mother, that's my suggestion. Not everything is fixable with dementia; in fact, very little IS.
I wonder, after mom puts the mask on and off enough times, will she be able to remember??? I know - it's becoming more clear that this just might not work. That makes me soooo sad. This was my last hope for resolving anything with her capabilities. We've done blood work and med changes, which did not help at all. CRAP.
I've see ads for adjustable beds that simulate how someone can automatically raise up their bed partner's side and stop their snoring. Maybe try raising up her head and shoulders a little? Hoping the noise isn't keeping YOU up at night!
My husband and I have that bed! It was either that, or one of us (HIM!) was moving upstairs. Horrible snoring and I can use a remote to raise his head more if he's having a noisy night. Works GREAT!
Thanks for responding!
Mom's snoring isn't bothering anyone. And luckily our rooms are at opposite ends of the house so I never hear it, unless we're traveling. The issue is her extreme tiredness and increased confusion.
I would ask the doctor for alternative ways to correct the problem.
Yes surgery has its risks and even more so for someone with dementia.
Older people find it harder to sleep,especially if they do a lot of napping during the day.
Forder the cpap, it's just confusing.
Try not napping during the day.
No liquids after 6 PM to lessen getting up to pee.
Try giving 3 mg Melatonin at night to help her sleep.
She doesn't sleep that well, no doubt. She does nap a bit during they day. Which of course throws off night time sleeping but she's so tired. It's a vicious cycle!
She doesn't drink enough fluids in general and not much after dinner. Just mostly enough to take her evening pills. She does get melatonin already.
Second. Commode next to bed (it's covered by Medicare)
Third. Urinal type device, in SNF they had me do that during the night as I was in a wheelchair and they hated answering the call button.
Commode? No thanks. I'm not emptying that thing out every morning. That's one of my lines in the sand. Can't stomach it. And she wouldn't be able to handle it herself. Well not without spilling pee all over my house. She has a really weird gait when she walks and it's just not happening.
Did you mean they can or can not learn new things?
Good point about the over night person. I guess I was not as assertive as I should have been. I set up a baby monitor (audio only but how I wish it was a video style!) and told mom to ask for help when she needed it and then the aide would come in from the living room (next room over) to assist her. She didn't ask, of course. Helper was shy about going into the room unasked - didn't want to scare her or wake her or whatever. I've talked to both of them about NEXT time, it's going to be different. Going to do it on a night that she doesn't have to work the next day so she can go home and sleep vs. wanting to sleep more while here.
We have an appointment with the respiratory therapist from the CPAP company in a couple of days and I'm hoping she can suggest some things to simplify the process to make it easier for mom. Mostly I want to know if there's a different mask that is easier for confused people to make sense out of. And I wonder if the high pressure can be turned down while she's learning how to use it.
Usually the machine itself will tell you how many hours of therapy, mask fit, number of apnea events etc. Philips and Resmed both have apps that you can assess information as well.
She doesn’t need to remove the entire mask.. just pull off tube and turn machine off or let it run until she puts tube back in.
They can also be connected to an app so you can see usage etc. As you know Medicare requires 4 hours to cover the cost. My husband started therapy about five years ago prior to dementia symptoms so it was easier. He sometimes is confused now but since I’m there, I can re-direct him
The CPAP was a God-send for us. He got significantly improved sleep, I enjoyed a snore free night and his health appeared to benefit.
As others have mentioned , there are a variety of different mask options to explore, daytime usage when you or caregiver can assist to increase her comfort and practice. Also, the sleep study group, manufacturer or medical company may be of help. I found a very competent woman at the supply company who recommended a different mask as my husband was always wiping his eyes I’m sure they have ideas that may work with dementia patients. There may even be leeway with dementia patients and Medicare coverage with a doctor intervention. She may need additional time to become at ease with it… six days might not be enough. Hopefully, you will quickly find a solution that works.
I used to have a small camera installed in her room. You can order it online. Is a cheap tiny one but works fine with an app. See and hear her. I’m in the process of installing it again.
i fully understand your struggle as I’m going myself through it right now. If there is memory loss/dementia involved could be really hard for them to learn new routines. Well, it is what it is and we have to deal with it. May we have the strength to keep doing it! Don’t give up girl!