Follow
Share

Due to family riff 6 months ago I left my position taking care of my elderly mom and stepfather 80 and 86 they had every phone number to home health etc . I left making sure they had all the contacts they needed. My stepfather made it impossible for me to help my mom he guarded her like a hawk and I had limited access to help her in home, although I worked around it it was hard getting past him. I was turned into a care slave, actually they are both narcissistic and selfish, entitled lazy, well I got a call last week, my mom said stepfather in hospital with dementia delirium and she has a sprained wrist from trying to run down the driveway to yell at someone, without her walker, my brother took her out of the hospital with sprained wrist and convinced her to call me for help I reluctantly did to my error, because my brother wouldn't stay with her after 5 days of me being there it was back to toxicity with them, all brother cared about was taking their car, borrowing some money because he is in trouble, and entertaining my stepfathers kids at the nursing home, he told me he is moving in to the house his behavior was so off and quite scary I told my mom she said she doesn't care she will never turn her back on him I understand that, I could never live near them or with them, and I had a panic attack and left, now she is back in the hospital her husband is lost to dementia, I just can't however I'm power of atty what do I do?

As POA, it's your obligation to either set up care for your mom and SF or to resign your POA.

Good luck to you.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to lealonnie1
Report

“I’m POA, what can I do”.

You do a certified letter to both mom and stepdad at whatever address they each are located, that states you are resigning as POA. Also send it to the law firm that did their POA and will.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to igloo572
Report

Resign your PoA and keep reporting them to APS. Even if you are their active PoA you cannot get a resistant adult to physically do things against there will. And, your weirdo brother is also in the mix. Walk away before you have regrets yet again. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice..." Right?
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to Geaton777
Report

No more POA for you, it can be reassigned to someone else after you decline to continue. No one can be forced into a toxic stew, jump out and leave them to it. It doesn’t mean you don’t care, it means you realize you’re unable to fix it and need to protect yourself
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Daughterof1930
Report

Yes, you can resign your POA. And for your safety, you should. You did your best in the toxicity but at this point all it your attempts will do is to make them more defiant.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to MG8522
Report

Adult protective services needs to be called. Your mom should be able to receive in home services or placed in assisted living. Your stepfather will most likely end up in memory care.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to Freyasmom24
Report

Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter