I live about 300 miles away from my mother. She's 82 and has Parkinson's. My brother, who has never worked much, lives with her and has done a much better job than expected with cooking, running errands, and lawn care. He makes sure she takes her medicine and encourages her to eat more.
Unfortunately, he also helps himself to her money via her ATM card. He often helps her pay for things so he knows the PIN number. And then he frequently pockets the card and uses it as he pleases. She either doesn't want to get it back or forgets to get it back. He also treats her car as if it's his and spends more time out of the house than I'd like.
I became aware of the ATM withdrawals only recently, when I began monitoring her account online. (I have POA.)
Talking with my brother has little effect--I've always suspected he's a sociopath (no conscience) but that's not a conversation I've ever had with him. He continues to treat the ATM as if it's his personal account.
If I were to simply have him arrested, then my mom will immediately need to be placed in nursing home--which she's completely opposed to. It's possible she would come live with me and my husband. We have the room and would be happy to have her...but we do both work full time. (She'd spend about as much time alone as she spends alone now except that we'd feel bad about it. My brother is often out and about.)
While she's healthy enough to remain in her home, I'd love for her to be able to stay there.
Are there any options here that I don't know about? Friends have suggested opening a new account, but he'd easily take the card for the new account and continue using her money.