My "whine moment today." What's yours?

My whine of the day is this...I hate living here with my father. I do. There is a reason adult children especially with families of their own, no longer live with their parents. I hate this whole setup. My father's caregiver brings her child to work constantly. Before it was once in a while, now its at least a couple of times per week. Hes an adorable little boy, dont get me wrong. But all of the jumping around is very distracting. Im in the basement and its like a ton of bricks being dropped on my head. She doesnt even ask if its okay to bring him. Nor does she tell him to stop jumping around. Anytime we eat anything she acts if she intended to use or cook it. Last night she cut up pineapple and left it in a dish. We ate the rest of it so of course she starts trouble first thing in the morning. No one needs that crap. This is our home and I feel like an outsider ! Not that my father cares. If anyone showed disrespect to my sister, they would be shown the door. With me Im nothing more than a maid living in the basement so he allows his caregiver to run the show and says nothing.

57twin, sorry, I didn't mean to laugh about the wet around the toilet. yuck....

My spider sense kicked me awake last night. I fumbled for the lamp and dad was in our bedroom again at the edge of the bed. Told him wrong room and he made his way back to his bedroom. I then got up to go to the bathroom and the floor was wet around the toilet.

My "whine" of the day is having one of those bad summer colds where your throat is sore and you are congested and feel like you are about to fall out and there is no one to help with all the caregiving but me , myself, and I. I am so afraid Mama will catch this, she may already have it, but caregiving is hard enough and then when you get sick on top of that...it is almost more than I can take...I am so exhausted...even more than normal...this is the worst feeling in the world. I am so used to being one of those tough people who can do it all, handle it all, take it all and keep going...how did I become this weak....?????

My grandmas too dependent on me, wastes her money, wastes my time......in all honesty it would be easier of she lived closer to me or was in a home.. I can't work on all her things AND mine. I work at a bank.. my hours are virtually the same as a doctor's office. Not only that, HER doctor is a couple of towns away. Timing makes everything difficult. How am I ever suppose to get anything done in a reasonable amount of time??

JeanetteB, that's funny.. you made me smile big! 57twin... My DH told me that he had shut all the sliders (6) on our porch last night. He had forgotten to turn out the lights, which I discovered before bedtime, but did not discover that one of the sliders (four foot wide) was left open during our half inch wind/rain storm until this morning! The wind must have been from the other side of the porch, since our carpeting was dry this AM. It could have been a mess.. But He gets an 'A+' for the effort. Those sliders are 25 years old and heavy..

'Going to pour my 'wine' now (or maybe something stronger!) and get ready for my nightly read after tucking my lovey into bed. Lucky me! ' Love you people!

My "whine" moment is, I've been abstaining from "wine". Not helping!

57twin - I guess I'm an eternal optimist (at least at times) - could be worse - he could have OPENED the windows in the dead of winter or when it was raining, instead of closing them! :-)

We actually had a warm humid day yesterday and dad was in the house while hubby and I did yard work. I came in the house and thought it was really warm which it was as dad had shut all the windows. It was overcast outside so he thought it was going to rain and then rain in the house. *sigh*

Awww that is so sad JeanetteB when you mention your chest tightening up almost brought me too tears because I feel that way also at times. Sending you lots of hugs!

Here is my current "whine" moment. I am sure there will be more before the day is over. It is now 30 days since my mother had her bunionectomy(she is already on 160 mg morphine a day for osteoarthritis) so pain control is not her problem. She has already had it okayed by her MD and she went to get her hair done, also went to Costco and shopped for an hour but this AM she just looks like her dog died because she still can't go downstairs to her little art studio because it would require getting around dirt and grass,she is still on antibiotics..I feel bad for her to a point but lets face it there are so many others on this site that have greater problems than they can't go to their art studio.Her mind is her ownworse enemy. She doesn't have dementia,just a narcissis that is feeling sorry for herself today ,so I am staying in my room and trying not to get to bummed out having to see that hang dog look and there is nothing I can do to make her happy, I am burned to a crisp.

Seroquil can be a blessing or a disaster as can many meds for the elderly. the only way to find out if it is the right drug is to try it and report and bad side effects immediately

I need to stay off FB this weekend. All my friends and loved ones back in South Florida are either at the beach, out on a boat or having big back yard cook outs ... my chest is tightening up too much looking and ...worst of all, missing everyone so much

I was out yesterday and saw a huge RV drive by and was so jealous! All I could think about was how my bro what probably at his vacation home up north and I'm stuck here!

My SIL called to see what we were doing this weekend..
I just told her today was Mom's bday and we were going out, if I try to get together with her she'll have to come here. Then I'll have to do the bbqing and I just don't have it in me!

ugh, the Holiday weekend for sure has put me in the "whine" mode. Everyone I know is going somewhere, doing something, with someone...Either going on or planning vacations, having cookouts, family is all traveling...everywhere..except here....as usual it will be Mama and me. period. heard the nephew was somewhere but no mention they are coming...if they do it will be a pop in long enough to alleviate your guilt and move on visit...sadly, I'd just as soon they forget it now...it's too late...for me the damage is done

I think the long Holiday weekend coming up has me in whine mode. I see campers/trailers/RVs all packing up and heading out... I want to go somewhere fun :( but I don't want to go alone :(((

My oldest brother just sent me a text saying he'd watch mom tomorrow...I can't refuse that offer now can I ? I just wish I had something fun to go do and someone fun to do it with.

What most likely will end up happening is me doing a thorough clean in her room and the house while she's out... it's so hard to do when she's following me around redoing what I just did.

Thanks Overwhelm!

lost my temper with my dad today. First he was up and dressed by 6:15. Didnt have a chance to enjoy my coffee. Asked him why up so early as it used to be 8-8:30. Perhaps since windows open a bit and he hears the birds? Anyhow had to finish plant shopping for my customers. Carried the flats put of trunk except for one that I soryed out for a customer I was going to plant this am. Carried unwanted ones to my potting shed and sorted out some others I had there to take to customer and when I went to put in trunk they were gone. I had told my dad to go in house and wait 15-20 min so I could get my planted sorted and car loaded then he could come with me but no he is messing with a tarp I put by car and did not know where plants went. I looked in open garage, the house over 20 min before I found the flat on the patio. He of course doesn't remember putting them there. I still haven't found the small bag of grass seed I bought monday either. ack!!!!
Good news is he is going to respite care next friday for the weekend and I just hired a girl to dad sit on occasional weekends so that will help.
The wine also helps!:)

Hi SusaA43 you were having a really rough day that happens to me to soon I sit down I hear her getting up! Sending you lots of love, music is the best it helps me mellow 70's. station is my favorite.

I love this forum.I hate to "whine" because so many others on here have it so much worse than me and handle things with grace.However,here is my whining today. I have now had to remove all meds from my mothers room due to her depressing behavior and emotional outbursts,basically temper tantrums. Not afraid of her committing suicide, she loves herself to much, just felt better removing them from her room. Well , this now adds one more thing I have to do for her.Also apparently I never do anything right. I guess I am just having compassion burnout. I have seen so many other people in much worse circumstances than her. I guess that is one of the problem's. She has never really seen how bad things can get for a senior when they have no one that can take care of them or even care about them. I am an only child and at firstthought that was a bad thing but after reading so many of the stories on this site I am beginning to see that being an only child might not be so bad.She doesn't have dementia, she is just a controlling narcissistic person and now because of old age and health problems can no longer control,just yell about it. I do get tired of her whining, just this week I took her to 3 MD appointments. She sees the MD more than I do. If I ever get as old as her I just hope I remember to thank anyone who does anything for me and if I am in my right mind to be realistic about old age. We are all aging and dying, no one is getting any younger. Everyone wants to go to heaven but no one wants to die.Caregivers take care of yourselves.

I'm whining about the weather this morning. It's dank and dark and dreary and putting me in a crappy frame of mind. Meh.

Jeannette - what dose has the neurologist put your mom on? MIL has been taking Seroquel for a little over a year now and it's been very helpful. Her neurologist started her out on a VERY low dose - just 12.5 mg at bedtime to see how she'd tolerate it, and she did great. If the dose is fairly low to start with give it a try, keep a close watch for any aberrant behaviors, and see how it goes. I've read some negative stuff about it too, but everyone is different. Just wanted to share a positive one.

book - if there was ever a legitimate excuse to whine you've found it!! YUCK!!!!!!!

My first whine here...it's been bugging me for weeks.
For someone who works full time and does the "dirty" work of changing pampers by herself, I am soooo tired of cleaning the darn toilet bowl! I can clean it today, and then when I come home for lunch the next day, someone (not dad) did #2 and did not flush twice so that all of it goes away. Now poop is stuck on the bowl that's above the water level. A few days of trying to not to clean the bowl (hoping sis would do it since I didn't make that mess), I cave in. I come home the next day at the end of work, and...the toilet bowl is back with the poop stuck on the sides. Tonight, I'm cleaning the toilet again.

Why?!?! Why do grown ups (including my nieces and their spouses) do not flush twice to get the poop off the wall? If that doesn't work, there's like 2 plastic sponge bath tubs and 2 tupperware bowls that can be used to "help" rinse the poop down when you flush it the 3rd time. Am I the only one in this family who gets grossed out over seeing poop on the side walls of the toilet bowl????

2 Days ago I took Mom to her Neurologist Appt. The Neuro prescribed Seroquel. It is now Thursday and their so called "Escript to our pharmacy has not come through. Two phone calls later... they just called. The script was routed 400 miles away.

That alone gives me the heebiejeebies about Seriquel ... I read up about in on AC. :( i can pick it up tomorrow.. we shall see.

I am not happy about this. It's just the "Sundowners" and the occasional outburst. Really... Im not sure about drugging her up. Crud!

Iwill search online about the lenovo

Glad- if I type a word not familiar to the kindle it will give me the option to double tap it to put in my dictionary. But if I type in a hurry without proofreading words get changed. I would like a tablet though. I think it would be easier.

SM this lenovo tablet is so cool. Absolutely no auto correct, rather it tries to figure out what I am typing and will make suggestions that I can tap to enter a word.

Sorry my kindle and autocorrect.

Yaya-have you the ads for art security? You could have a security system put in where you can check the house online or on your cell. The ad shows patents checking on their tern age daughter making sure she has no boys over LOL! You pay an installation fee and a monthly payment. There was another poster who lived with her mother with dementia. She installed cameras so she could get a little time to herself but still see what her mom was doing.

Oh, yaya you have to see that movie. LOL There are 2 of them actually - Grumpy Old Men and Grumpier Old Men. Both have Walter Matthau, Jack Lemmon and Burgess Meredith in them, and Ann-Margaret is in the first one, Sophia Loren is in the second. Both hilarious and heartwarming movies.

Oh the tricks they played on each other...holy cow.

Jeannette and Susan - I'm dying here! LOL! Haven't seen the movie but I can picture the scene.

Unfortunately (in more ways than one..heheh) the distance would probably be too far for it to work. We're about 1/4 mile from her with woods in between houses. Plus she has no internet/wifi service, nor can she afford it. A great idea though!

I've thought more than once about how helpful it would be to have some kind of video suveillance system setup - like a nanny cam. But aside from grappling with the moral/ethical reservations I have over "spying" on her, the cost of setting something like that up would probably be prohibitive. *sigh*

The "evil" side of me, however, does find the entertainment potential intriguing......