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I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.

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My mom’s in MC and constantly asks “ I want to go home “ “When am I going home?” “ Why am I here?” Ugh!
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please find time for the things that make you feel happy to be alive.
🌸🌸🍀🍀🌸🌸🍀🍀
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That's what I'm trying to say, house flower, thanks!!
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I really don’t believe in karma. I do believe in you reap what you sow.
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I think what I was trying to say was I believe in karma as for , we bring are own karma, it is up to us to change ,so we don't bring bad karma into are life
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Out of curiosity, I checked reddit to see more or less, how many people who comment there, believe in karma. I thought it would be 50/50.

It's more like 95% don't believe in karma, 5% do.

Personally, I've never seen karma at work in my life. As in, I've never seen people who did bad things get what they deserve, in my opinion. And I've seen plenty of good people have terrible things happen to them.

But despite that, I believe in karma. It's like a deep belief in order in the universe. Moral order. That one day - don't know when, there will indeed be karma, people will get what they deserve.

Hellokarma! Yes, I'll continue doing me, which as you said, is already a full-time job. I'm even doing over-time.
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Alva I'm not a big believer in karma either, I just believe if people keep doing the things that are wrong the eventually get caught.

I was friends a man who did some really crappy stuff to his aging mom. He never forgave himself. He ended up in jail, for covering up his sons crimes. I think some people that can't forgive themselves, keep doing stupid stuff because they don't feel that they deserve better.

We all have done dom hurtful things to people, it's all about learning not to do it again.
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Did someone call my name?
I confirm I exist. Everything happens at the right time…

You just keep doing you, which is already a full-time job.
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Hereiam, I think karma is total nonsense. But then I am a non-believer.
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So true!
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I think hereiam, that those people are more miserable and unhappy than most , that's why they want to try to make everyone else miserable
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About bad people seemingly getting away with things:
"Just because we see them acting all powerful and fine in public doesn't mean they are peaceful and happy with themselves in private. You have to see the whole picture."
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So I quit a job once, because the boss was sexually harassing me. Didn't feel like going through the bs of no one believing me. Didn't like the job anyways.

Anyways I got a jod as a caregiver, took one of my clients to the library, guess who was homeless sitting in the library. The boss 🤗 He got his karma. I honestly new he would.
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Dear Sp, "In fact I have seen people who hurt people go on to have much success and protection from the universe and reap no consequences of their actions."

I like the reply I just saw of someone on the internet, about karma:

Perhaps right now. But Karma takes time and it's not over yet. :-).  And even if they're doing "better", they may have some things going on that you don't know about. Remember that you cannot know everything about someone's life.

Here I Am
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I totally understand what you're saying. And you might be right. But you might be wrong.

I wrote, in reply to what you said, "many a truly evil person has certainly not gone on to reap the reward for hurting others."

Maybe it only seems like that ----- in this life.
It depends also on one's view of what happens after this life.

Here I Am
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@hereiam I know that for sure. I have living proof, right now that karma does not exist. It is only natural to think that good people will somehow come out on top in this world when people intentionally harm them BUT that is the exception not the rule in this universe. In fact I have seen people who hurt people go on to have much success and protection from the universe and reap no consequences of their actions.
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Dear Sp, I understand your skepticism. And maybe you're right. After all, none of us are omniscient and know the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth about the universe. But, you might also be wrong. There might indeed be karma. I believe it.

"many a truly evil person has certainly not gone on to reap the reward for hurting others."

We don't know that for sure, Sp.
Maybe it only seems like that, in this life.
Maybe, not everything is as it seems.

The universe, life, is quite mysterious.
After all, if karma would so obviously exist, no one would dare to behave badly, and bad people would never reveal their true nature.

Here I Am
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Sorry at @hereiam there is no such thing as karma. It's a nice concept in theory but many a truly evil person has certainly not gone on the reap the reward for hurting others.
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Not revenge.
I believe in karma.

I saw Venting’s quote, “You can’t do ugly things to people and expect to live a beautiful life.”

I totally agree, and I think it happens naturally. Karma happens naturally.

No one did anything against me, so the post isn’t about me. They did something to a friend of mine. Even the courts will go against what they did. It’s not revenge. Courts are not in the business of revenge. Bad acts have consequences. Through the law. And through karma.
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Cwillie:
Yes, any case of unexpected death at home is a coroner's case. However that will be VERY short and sweet in the case of a 90 year old. Almost always is. A trip to the medical examiner, autopsy, and likely listed as accidental death. I am sorry about this loss. It seems none were present, and likely they will be offered a simple cremation; it will just be determined who is the next of kin, who wishes to be listed administrator of the estate if no will is extant.
A good long life and one lived at home.
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Here I am,
I am sorry to see you harbor feeling of revenge against someone. They old saying goes something about "When you seek revenge dig two graves" and it is so right. This level of anger destroys not the other person, but ourselves and it eats us from the inside out.
I recommend you seek help from a few visits to a cognitive therapist. It's normal to feel anger; it isn't normal to hang on to it over time.
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Good luck Anxietynacy!
My post has nothing to do with my sister, nor with caring for her.

Sometimes here, we share our thoughts that have nothing to do with caregiving. I tried to make it clear in my post, by saying it’s not about my sister.

It’s about some people who do very bad things to other people, and who therefore deserve bad things to happen to them.
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Hereiam, you are understandable burnt out, and desperately need a break and answers how to get more help with your sister. My burnt out moment was the second time I drove home from moms , not caring if I lived.

Now I'm on this incredible journey, of self help. Please get some counseling, you are not the first or the last
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Here I am.

I'm a man, taking care of my elderly sister. Haven't been online for a long time. I need to get something off my chest. It's not about my sister.

Have you ever wished for the destruction of someone? I have. Here I am (yup, that's my name!), right now wishing for it.

Some people really deserve it. I wish for their utter destruction, and I don't mean death. That's too easy. I mean, alive but suffering. Some people seriously deserve it. I have certain people in mind.

I woke up this morning, with this strong thought. Never happened to me before. I don't normally wake up like that. The thought: destroy, destruction, I wish for their destruction, they deserve it.

Please don't misunderstand: I'm not going to do anything. I just wish it.
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Golden, all I really know about her is she was a bad alcoholic, her husband didn't want anything to do with her , dumped her at a family owned farm , so they could claim ownership. Didn't work, sence she died, wasn't much left of the family farm house after she died anyways. I don't think anyone but the doctor new much about her health. And the doctor said on the phone that she was surprised she lived as long as she did

Luckily she died, and then hours later the furnace ran out of oil, she wasn't found for at least 3 days. But it's was cold inside. So that was good
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eva - chilly here too but no snow so far.

cw - I'm so sorry about your sis's mil and the lack of planning. I guess there aren't a ton of choices now.

nacy -seems strange as she was so young but she must have been ill.
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I'm so sorry Willie, 😔, my husband was asked to check on his sister in law, a few years ago, because she wasn't answering the phone.
She was passed , but the police called her doctor, the doctor said no reason to investigate, the doctor wasn't surprised, so there was no investigation, even though she was in her late 60s .

Eva, I'm so sorry, we are having the best day in the North East today. It will come. I was getting really down about the weather last weekend, cold and damp
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Sister just called, her MIL was found dead a short while ago and unfortunately it has to be investigated as an unexpected death in the home. Sis sounded really rattled (thank goodness she wasn't the one who found her) and of course although the woman was in her 90's the family have made zero plans for this eventuality.
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How come nobody is whining anymore?
My whine today, it is snowing again and cold outside.
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@waytomisery

She's dipping into some of her CDs, part of her IRA, and part of her checking accounts to pay for it. She sold some land she's had forever to a long distant relative for $90,000. She has signed the various paperwork with the realtor agency that's selling the house. Her realtor has brought some paperwork to our house and others have been emailed to her for her to e-sign.

She hasn't been to a doctor in over 5 years and the only pills she takes are eye vitamins, a Centrum vitamin, a Vitamin D tablet, and every few days, a magnesium tablet. Before Covid, I did lift her into my car whenever she needed to go somewhere.

Barring anything crazy happening at the last minute, I technically will have my first job with the completion of the house purchase. Mom decided that it will be in my name and it will be a way for me to get revenue via someone staying there and paying rent. Because of that, I can put "landlord" on my resume. Even though the caregiving nightmare is still ongoing, at least I can say I'm employed. At least, to a degree.
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