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Do you today with medicine that says no alcohol give them a little from time to time? Wondering if anyone has received advice that it is ok once a week or so to give in so the parent won't be abusive?

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My dad has dementia and is an alcoholic. His stems from beer. I have come up with a way that he gets his beer but not the alcohol and it has been working perfectly. I have a couple of empty beer cans of his brand of beer that he drinks and I pour Odouls non alcoholic beer into his empty cans and give it to him. He does not know the difference because he is drinking beer out of his can that he is accustomed to. He is non aware that it is non alcoholic. Been doing this for over a week and has been working out perfectly.
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Do they live with you?or are they able to care for themselves?
It is okay to do so..As my Grandmother had Cancer and at their age it helps
with the pains.it's okay.
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Talk to your doctor and/or the pharmacist. But, if they are really an alcoholic giving then any alcohol is probably a mistake. If you are taking care of this person yourself I would advise sending them to a nursing home. Let them dry out there and then, maybe they can move to assisted living from there. Why destroy your life trying to take care of them? It is not worth it. Even if they are your parent. There are excellent dementia specialty care units in our area. Check the ones out in your area. Good luck.
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Yes, where is your parent living? Is he or she somewhere they can be safe (to themselves and others) when drunk? I'm probably not in the majority in my opinion on alcoholism in elderly, terminally ill people. My feeling is, if someone is already dealing with the profound losses of dementia and all the accompanying physical and emotional ailments that it brings, is that really the time to decide they have to dry out?? For what? To become a better parent, a better employee, a better spouse? Those ships have sailed. If it's necessary to limit alcohol in order for palliative medications to work, then do it. But, go cold turkey at the end of one's life when already dealing with dementia, why?
However, I certainly don't think you should have to subject yourself to your parent's alcoholism. Maybe you already suffered the impact of it during your childhood. You shouldn't invite it into your life anymore than you have to now.
If it's financially possible, I'd suggest an assisted living situation. Be VERY upfront with the administrator about your parent's alcoholism - believe me, this is not an uncommon situation. Make sure they understand what they're getting into and have a plan in place for how much consumption they'll tolerate (they can't have a resident going on a total bender every night) and plan for how they and you will handle negative behaviors. You know your parent. If the plan they propose doesn't sound workable, move on to the next community. You don't want your parent's behavior in the AL to become an endless stream of phone calls and meetings for you.
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I have a mother who has a traumatic brain injury and has always has major issues with alcohol. She does not drink around me,but my siblings provide it for her when they visit. It takes days for her to recover from a visit involving alcohol.
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Currently my wife and I live in a beautiful retirement community. My wife has alcoholic dementia and drinks only cranberry juice. Her doctor really inforced ONLY SOFT DRINKS. There are lockers for those approved and they have locks on them. I am an alcoholic and drink only Odouls and soft drinks.
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Ps. If your parent becomes abusive w/o drinking, talk to their doctor, they need medically supervised detox.
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Please be aware that far too many seniors suffer with depression, particularly after tremendous losses (work/job/self worth, death of friends, spouse, loss of good health/mobility/loss of limbs and/or diminished functioning of multiple body parts, loss of independence/car keys/ability to stay in one's life-long home, etc. etc.) The depressant alcohol severely impacts one's ability to cope, one's emotional stability, as well as many other safety issues including activities of daily living. Moreover, alcolhol certainly increases the risk of further emotional, physical, and mental health damage. Consequently, it also significantly increases the risk for suicide, already at horrific levels. Extremely sad. Ask any loved one.
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My mother has 2 24-hour aids in her house and said they were told she could have a glass of wine from time to time. I have seen her after two glasses of wine and no meds and it was not good. She has not had wine every day since May of this year. She just gets mad when she is told she cannot have wine so they are giving it to her so avoid confrontation.
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My Mom is 91 & just moved in with me & i have been impressed with how much she drinks. This seems to be a response to problems with not sleeping & stress. Since she is not on any meds I haven't been concerned about those issues. She tries to monitor herself but does get pretty loaded occasionally. I was happy to see the replies that held a tolerant attitude. I've noticed things like mixing up words, memory problems, crabbiness, etc. that seem more relavent to drinking or some form of dementia. My husband died of a brain tumor so I have insight as to the rocky road ahead & am looking for support for myself.
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