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My mom incontinent and immobile, was very happy at the NH #1 she was in. She was active, knew everyone, on committees and busy! We were promised by the manager that if she paid down all her assets there, she would be able to stay in the same private room for as long as she lived/wanted. Great! We liked the place, and so did mom. She paid down all of her money there and went on medicaid. A few months afterward, we were told she had to leave because the NH was switching over to a different type of care.


She has dementia that becomes worse every time she is moved and this move proved to be very disturbing for her. Her dementia got very bad from the move. She hates where she is, is afraid, is treated poorly, and we, her family do not have anything good to say about them either. Because the new NH did nothing to get her Social Security transferred to their address, and help with a medicaid review, we were held up with transferring her out.


We are in the process of getting her out of this horrible place now. I also called an Ombudsman to look into her situation there because they lost all her belongings when she arrived, and never told us. When questioned, they said they have a witness stating that my brother carried out boxes of her belongings. This is NOT true. She also developed Sepsis from a wound after falling. They decided not to take her to a wound care center because it was out of network under her supplemental insurance. I was told this when I called the wound care center to ask why she didn’t get there. The NH said the center cancelled the appointment on them because they were out of network. Mom needed surgery and was in the hospital for almost two weeks. In the hospital, we found out from the doctor that she was on many different types of sedatives, which explains why she sounded drunk, and in a stupor all the time.


We will move her soon. I am afraid though, because these moves are detrimental to her.


I don’t understand how a NH#1 can take every cent you have and then tell you to leave because they are switching to a different type of care. Is this common? I am sick with the thought that she will be happy at the next place we move her to next week and possibly be asked to move yet again. To see her decline because of moving, is heart breaking.

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To answer your question simply, no this is not common. You did the right thing by calling your state's ombudsman. I'd sue NH #1 for what they failed to do for your Mom which was to keep her there.
At the very least they could've grandfathered her in on the type of care she needed due to her dementia.
I'd also sue NH #2 for neglect, loss of personal property and elder abuse. These people need to learn why they're in business so go talk with an attorney and see what can be done for your Mom. Good luck.
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Nursing Homes can pretty much do anything to move patients. Its all in the fine print of the contracts. Nursing homes also have to keep people moving so they can re-sell their most attractive rooms.

It’s inexcusable that her possessions were lost.

Luckily— she has you as an advocate. I hope you can get her out of there quickly.
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Ran into this situation, but in this case the facility was unable to hire enough workers to meet state regulations.  I suspect we will see more of this because we need immigrants who are willing to do the work, considering these desirable jobs.
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Bumping you up
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My "scam alarm" just went off after reading this. Besides the lousy treatment your mother is receiving and the lies they're telling, I'm also wondering about the assets that were transferred. Are these all "lost" such that you would have to start out again figuring out how to pay for your mother's care? How much time would these assets have covered if they had been paid out on a monthly basis?

I'm just wondering if the attitude is along the lines of "okay, we have your money, so we have nothing to gain by taking good care of you. In fact, if you die soon, then we can keep all the money and rent the room to someone else."
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worriedinCali May 2019
The assets refers to the Medicaid spend down. There was no transfer of assets, I think you are reading the OP wrong. She was self-pay and told she stay there once she went on Medicaid. So she spent down all her assets until she Medicaid-eligible.
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Sepsis?
Items gone missing?
Accusations?
Time to get an elder estate lawyer - NOW. DO NOT WAIT!
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Yes common They're supposed to give you advanced notice so you can make other arrangements.
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This is so disgusting and cruel. I'd be holding the former home accountable but would not attempt to do anything on my own if I could find an elder law attorney willing to take the case on. Of course sadly, it proves one should never take anyone at their word and get it in writing. I'm guessing that management changed and the person who promised she could stay was either clueless or also focused on $$$. I'm glad you are in touch with the ombudsman's office. I wonder if a potential law suit might result in your mom being allowed to move back to the original place and since it is assisted living the settlement might result in having to provide 24/7 care for her. But I am a dreamer...
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Check into the Facility and Make sure it is Reputable...Yes, Changes made all of the Time, Even Some, Hun, Closing Down.  Really.
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Unless you had a contract with NH#1 that guaranteed your Mother a place for life, you will have no choice but to leave. Usually the existing NH should have made arrangements to transfer existing residents to another NH who would be no longer “eligible” to stay at the same place.

From the situations you described about lost belongings and medical mistreatment, maybe you should review the situations with a lawyer. My only comment to you and others, is no NH is a holiday inn, and you should have been more on top of your Mother’s care.
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