My mom will not wake up in the morning, is it okay if I let her sleep in late every day?

Has her doctor mentioned Pallative Care or Hospice? Those services can be a comfort to you and to your mom, if she is in the end-of-life stage. The staff that comes to help can help you understand what is going on in your mom, and the options for dealing with it.

Good Evening All. I am so happy to be able to read the suggestions in this post. I am lucky enough to care for my Mom 24/7 in order to repay her a very small amount for what she has done for me in my 51 years of life. This will most likely not help or be relative to the question at hand, but a friend of my Mother's sent me info on a study that was being done linking sleep apnea with dementia. It just happened to come at the time that I was hearing all sorts of strange noises coming from her room in the middle of the night. I was not sleeping much at all in the beginning of all this. Turns out she does have sleep apnea and stops breathing about 30-50 times an hour! She uses a c-pap machine now and she is not cured, but her memory has definetely improved and she is MUCH sharper! She almost NEVER takes naps any more and wants to go all the time. She's actually wearing me out! The study also showed that there have been mis-diagnoses of dementia when it was only sleep apnea. Just wanted to put that out there. God Bless You All for caring for your loved ones!!!!!!

Follow the advice of JeanneGibbs and look into Hospice or palliative care. Hospice is wonderful and they are making my Mothers life and mine easier. And they provide a good education on what to expect with end of life issues (your Dr. doesn't sound too helpful in this regard).

If there is not a reversible medical problem going on - and remember people with dementia many time can't or won't communicate symptoms accurately or at all, such as pain, infection, constipation, stomach or abdominal pain that would make them either tired or agitated and uncomfortable eating, then it might just be nearing the end. But don't necessarily let a doc just automatically assume that's it. And always consider side effects of medication. Sedative side effects may be worse at the same dose as someone ages, and other side effects may worsen or change as well. Some side effects even crop up gradually witlh longer duration of use of the drug, particularly antipsychotics.

I want to thank everyone for their responses to this post. It has been so very helpful to me. We just had Hospice come in and give us a consultation. They did agree that my Mom is ready for Hospice and in most likely hood only has a short time left, possibly weeks. I appreciate so much everyone's input. Making the decision to have Hospice come was hard, but I am so glad that I did. I feel a great deal of relief to know what is happening and what we need to plan for. For those of you who seem to be in a similar situation as I am, please get some assistance and contact Hospice. If your loved one isn't ready, they will let you know. At least you will have some sort of advice that can help you with making decisions. Thanks again to all of you.

Please call your Hospice people. They are sent from Heaven. I could not have made it with my mom if not for them. They will look after your mom with you and explain each thing that is happening to her. They are comfort itself, next to God.
God bless you

When my aunt first moved in with me, she slept all the time, seemed very lethargic, very hopeless. Her doctor wanted to put her on a mood stabilizer. I asked that he let me see if I could motivate her a bit. 2 months later, he looked at me in surprise, saying he'd never seen someone that age (93) blossom like that. I put her in adult day care which has a lot of activities, bingo, daily lunch, lots of people - she thinks she works there. She also does exercise there twice each visit. I got a mood light which she sits in front of 30 minutes daily. She is now 94 and lively, enjoying tv and plays and musical events. She has vascular dementia, and one of its hallmarks is lots of sleeping. I let her sleep as long as she likes on Tues, thurs, and Sat because she's wiped out from day care on monday, wed., and friday. This is just our experience - you're doing the right thing by asking for a wide variety of responses. Also, I would recommend the website "Alzheimer's Reading Room." It is a lifesaver! Hang in - and be sure you get plenty of sleep and take care of yourself.

I think that hospice/ palliative care consult is a good idea. It is difficult to tell if "this is it" or your mom needs motivation and routine activity to lively her up. I am a nurse, but i am hospital trained, and was not attuned to the changes in my mom in the 3 years i cared for her. My patients either got better and left the hospital or were acutely ill and died. My mom died in March @ 96 y.o.God love you for what you and all of you do. Jean

My mom is doing the same, hardly any fluids or food. Her average intake a day is 6-8 oz of fluid and (2-3) 3.5oz of baby food (calorie intake between 180-250/day)that I feed to her thru medicine syringe. My mom has been on Hospice since May. I feared that she was starving. But Hospice nurse reassured me that her body is adjusting to her decline in health and she no longer needs alot to survive. My mother is in last stage Dementia.
If your mom is sleeping reasonable thru the night, then let her sleep during the day. Example yesterday mom sleep a total of 18 hours, today she has been awake since 6am so its a sleep rollercoaster here. But trust me from experience, the more you try to fight them to "wake up" or "stay awake" they more they fight it. Mom will become so restless and anxious when I force her to stay up. Thats where Hospice has helped me understand its okay for that extra sleep. I now know that when she is sleeping she is at peace.
Talk to her doctor and see if Hospice is right for her at this time. I am so pleased with the support system mom has 24/7 from Hospice.
**One more thing*** Since your mother is no longer moving alot or eating alot be attentive to her Bowel movements. Even though your mom doesn't have a good intake she still should be moving her bowels somewhat every 3 days(Hospice advised). My mother gets impacted alot now. It might gross you out but you need to check for impaction and disimpact if nessecary. If you don't feel comfortable thats where Hospice nurse will come in handy for you. Twice this week I had to "clean out" mom. I don't need to worry about the urine end cause mom has a foley. This is something that I might have overlooked if it wasn't for the nurse.
Don't stress too much she will awaken and eat when she is ready. I spent weeks freaking out when mom started like your mom. Now when her eyes open I am standing there with food and fluid ready to shove in. At this point thats the best I can do is TRY!!!!

Oh yellowfever, I went thru the impaction in the ER with my mom over a year ago. She started on 2 Tablespoons of miralax in her tea every morning, and we are down to just 1 teaspoon daily and she is ALWAYS fine now. (I get her to drink 4 ozs with it by holding a straw up to her)The Dr says its fine to do it daily and its been our savior.(of course check with your dr) Its hard gettng adjusted as the large dosage I started off with made her have diareahea at first but now we are fine here. If your Mom is impacted, its impacted all the way up her colon , which is bad. There is a vagus nerve near their anus which can give them a stroke or heart attack I was told in the hospital so I dont do it myself now, I did once and the 2nd time we went to the ER. (what a horrible experience, never again)
Poor thing, and poor you. I also have a great recipe for giving her to eat like 1/4 cup of daily, or with her morning pills: The dr told me they eat it up at the nursing homes and it keeps them under control. I used to do it twice a day but now only mornings so she gets "rid of it" during the day.........................
Cook on the stove in a small pan..
I can of prune juice (5.5 ozs)
2/3 cup applesauce
2/3 cup bran flakes (or raisin bran)
Heat it on low until it all dissolves. I add sugar also to make it sweeter and she loves it .