Has anyone moved a parent from nursing home to home with hospice care at end of life? COVID visitation restrictions are unbearable.

Don't know how close she is to end of life BUT I was in the same situation when covid first started. Mom in NH close to end of life (on hospice care) and they were going to prevent any family from seeing her. I made last minute decision to bring home on hospice care on a Sat. morning. Contacted hospice nurse (not knowing if the move could be handled on a Sat) and by 4pm Sat. they had brought all essentials (bed, oxygen, supplies, suction machine, etc.) to my home even handling ambulance deliver her AT NO COST to me.
BEST THING I COULD HAVE DONE! She had been comatose (not eating or communicating) for a week and when ambulance arrived at NH she suddenly became alert. By the time she reached my house she was hungering for food and wanting to talk to anyone that would listen. For the next 3 days she had plenty of family (children, sisters, brothers, grandkids, etc.) who were able to see and talk with her before becoming comatose again. She passed away on Fri. am with me standing by her side swabbing her mouth with cold water.
SO THANKFUL FOR THE LORD HELPING ME WITH MY DECISION TO BRING HER HOME. If she had still been in NH with no family there for that last week it would have been very difficult for me to live with.

AT PEACE

My dad recently passed after a four-year battle with Alzheimer's. The best decision we made was to move him into our Mom's apartment to receive hospice care. I stayed with them 24/7 to administer painkillers, and the hospice care was incredibly kind and helpful. He died peacefully, in my mother's arms, surrounded by children and grandchildren. My mom is so grateful that we had that opportunity. Good luck to you. I found it to be incredibly difficult, emotionally and physically, but I wouldn't change a thing. It was an honor to take care of him.

My father was in rehab after a hospitalization this summer and chose to leave rehab (it wasn’t working) and come home on hospice. You need to know that hospice for us provided every possible supply we needed, excellent nursing care on an as needed basis, and a bath aide twice a week. What they don’t provide is around the clock care. The actual hands on care is on family to provide. For the first few weeks we were able to do this between family and some volunteers from dad’s church. When his needs got more intense he had to hire CNA help to accomplish keeping him home until he died. It was very difficult for the last two weeks, especially the last week. I’m very glad to have done it, feel privileged to have helped him, but it was so very hard. I wish you peace and wisdom in deciding this

If you can have enough help to make this doable, go for it. Without adequate help, it could be very challenging. Not to be rude, but how dire is his condition? It is virtually impossible to know how long someone has left, even when the end seems very near. The body is an amazing thing and can be very surprising.

Can you lobby for extra visitiation? Are they on hospice care at NH? If not, switch their care to that level and then maybe you will be able to visit more? I thought some places allowed visits to hospice patients.

Yes, please do asap are you will regret it.

Wouldn't you want to be home to die amoung family?

Your lived one will be halpier, safer and feel loved being home around their loved ones, not in some cold and uncaring place to die alone.

No one should have to die alone!

You will always know you did what was best in the end and have no regrets.

Bring Loved One Home, the sooner the better.

I brought my 101 1/2 yer old mother home after a 3 day stay for uti treatment in a hospital. She had developed delirium. The doctor was going to put her in a snf for rehab. I said no as no family would be allowed to see her due to Covid restrictions. She is a handful to take care of but having her home with me is so much better for both of us. I just could not see leaving her alone in a nursing home with no family. At such an advanced age her health can change in the blink of an eye. She certainly would have felt deserted and I suspect would be dead already had she gone to snf for rehab. There was such a dramatic downhill change in her appearance after only 3 days alone in a hospital room with no family visiting that when I came to pick her up and take her home I actually cried when I first saw her, I can only imagine she would have gone down hill quickly had rehab taken place in the snf. Not to disparage the care she would have received. But absence of family and the familiar at that adavnced age can cause dramatic changes in health. The VNA came a few times a week and then discharged after the rehab time was up. She improved that much. They were going to put her in pallitive or hospice care at the onset. She wishes to die at home. Hopefullly she will peacefully barring the onset of any critical health issue that would require hopitalization.

My dad and I are currently caring for my 84 year old mother at home. She is receiving hospice services which entails a nurse coming to check vitals twice week and an aide who comes twice a week for about an hour to help with bathing or other things. Most of the care is left to my dad, and I come over as much as possible while still trying to hold down a job. My mom has dementia and we really don't want to put her in a nursing home because of not being able to be with her because of COVID. So I understand your concerns. Its super hard and I'm glad we have two of us. My dad is sometimes up all night with my mom because she won't sleep, so on those days I take a vacation day from work and come and sit with her so dad can sleep. We've only been doing this for about three weeks, so I often wonder if we will be able to survive this way for months or if we will eventually have to out her in a nursing home. I wish you the best with a tough decision!

If your mother is getting good care, think twice about taking her out of her facility. All moves and changes of routine can be difficult for elderly people. Can you handle it if she lingers on for a long time? Is her facility able to handle hospice-type care? My mother's doctor agreed to switch my mother to hospice care and her memory care facility told me they could handle it without moving her to skilled nursing. Does your mother understand the situation that you are not able to visit her more than once every 2 weeks? She may be coping with this better than you think. Ask your facility if you can have extended visiting privileges if her condition worsens. They now allow this in hospitals. It's worth a try.

I actually got my Dad out of the nursing home because I didn't want him dying in that particular nursing home. He came home for awhile but was declining so another nursing home had a bed for him but he had to stay in the hospital for 3 days. It appeared ( & was true) that he really needed to be in Hospice, or in home Hospice. They didn't have a bed for him so they were going to do in home at the hospital. My dad passed b4 that could happen.
I recommend going by your gut instinct as you don't want or need to feel guilty about not being able to see her and when you have a family that they love and care for they want to see you. She may pass without you being there but we still had a lot more time with him than in a nursing home. I can go on feeling I did the right thing for my father.
Go with your gut and do the Hospice care, they are wonderful. Check them out as well, though.

What are you waiting for?