How can I get through to my Mom that you wear depends under your clothes?

Have you discussed with her why she likes to wear them on the outside? If you can get some insight into why she does it, that may help you convince her. My husband (LBD) did odd things that made sense within the context of his delusions. Arguing and explaining and reasoning are not going to change anything. Your only chance is to get into her world and figure out a way to make it happen to suit her needs.

Would she be willing to wear the depends you help her put on, then her pants, and then some larger depends? (At least in the house.) That could possibly serve her need to wear them on the outside, and your need to have them fulfill their function!

Does Mom have a uti? Dementia symptoms and behaviors generally get much worse and wackier with a uti, and will go back to baseline when the infection is cleared up. That could be very good news for you!

Stop fixating on stupid stuff. Just let her wear the Depends with a mumu and change them often since she is getting UTIs. Ask the doctor for the resistant new antibiotic ZERBAXA if she is getting several UTIs. Add some yogurt without sugar to her diet too. Let go of you trying to control her. You will be happier.

One pair inside and one pair outside

I want to laugh but it really isn't funny. My Dad takes his Depends off so the bed is flooded during the night. The laundry is endless. Plus his bedroom floor is like a landmine, you never know when your going to step on a puddle. I keep thinking I should be grateful it's just pee. Wait till the s--t starts to happen. I just keep telling myself that he deserves the best and I want to make his life joyful. Hang in there.

PeaceandLove, I had to wear such a product after having surgery in case there were oops side effects. I found the product a bit scratchy around the waist when I first started to wear them. Reminded me of those back of the collar shirt tags that were annoying, that type of feel. Putting a thin layer of body lotion around the waist helped soften the feel.

Peaceandlove, I found an adult onsie garment on Preventawear that works great for keeping incontinent briefs out of reach. They have several anti-strip undergarments available.

No, it is not funny, but sometimes you have to laugh to keep from going nuts. With that in mind, here's my story. My father in law did not have dementia, but he needed to wear depends. Thing was he wanted to sit around in them and and a t-shirt in front of everyone. He didn't care who came in. His wife let him get away with it, but my husband had a fit and made him quit doing it. Maybe he DID have dementia because I can't imagine anyone in their right mind acting like that.

Agree depends can be uncomfortable so would she keep them on it she had a pair of cotton panties underneath? I know it is extra laundry but would cut down on what you have to do now. How about thin pyjama pants underneath at least at home and slip on a wrap around skirt when you go out. If you use a skirt/dress when you are not watching her my guess is she will just tuck it into the Depends.
To the person with the puddles on the floor would your loved one use a comode if placed at the bedside. Otherwise keep a mop and bucket close by and mop your way in. if you have carpet or hard wood but a piece of linolium as big as the room and just mop that. You can staple it down round the edges if necessary. protect the matress with a waterproof cover and buy a vinyl covered chair if he sits in the room. You can throw a washable blanket over it.

I agree with the suggestion for the onsies. Finding them for female is MUCH easier then men. Anyone with a resource for male onsies?

katnmouse, buckandbuck has a lot of one-piece adaptive clothing for men. They have onesies too.