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I have a photo album with lots of photos of everyone in the family, old pictures and more recent pics. My question is, should I give it to my mom who has moderate dementia to look at? Would it make her upset to see the old photos or would it be comforting? I'm just looking for some opinions. This is all very new to me.

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She might enjoy it. She may not remember the people or situations, though. Try it and take your cues from her.
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My husband's aunt enjoys her photo album but I always add the names on the photos before I print them. She does enjoy seeing these especially the children in the family.

I have also made refrigerator magnet photos for her to see when she scoots around.
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When shown photos, my grandmother with dementia only remembered her parents on her own, but she lit up and wanted to talk about them. That was precious. So I vote yes, give her the photos, and maybe be prepared to gently help her skip over the people and events she doesn't remember.

I was so naive about dementia when I did photo-sharing. I showed my Gma a church photo with her late husband, and when she asked where he was, I told her he had passed. She said, "Oh. I wondered where he went." She took "the news" well and seemed fine. Still, it's something I'd do differently now. If I could go back, I would only talk about the photos in a way that would make her happy. But it's a treasured memory for me to have that experience with her of going over pictures, and I learned things about her childhood that I would never have known. It was very sweet.

I think you and your mom could have a lot of fun doing this.
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I would definitely give her the albums. I have found that it is most enjoyable for my mom when the pictures are labeled with the names of people and pets. This way I wasn't always telling her over and over who they are. More importantly she can enjoy them on her own. An added benefit if she's able is for her to fill in the missing names. I was surprised at how many names mom could put to faces one time, just to forget the next. Have a pen handy and write them in. In my case, mom is the last one of her generation which means nobody else will know who all those people are.
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LisaNormand22, oh how I wished I could have sat down with my parents with the photo albums. Now there are empty spaces in the family tree that they could have answered. And there are photos of people I have no idea who they are.

Elders love to talk about their past, so have ready a notebook to take notes, you will be glad you did.
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Ask Mom, because she is the one most likely to have an answer. Tell her you are thinking of making a scrapbook of old family pictures. Ask her if she would like to look at some of the albums you have "found", or if she would like to make a scrapbook for herself out of some old pictures.
You will know by her attitude what is best to do. Often old memories are the easiest triggered and often the more often triggering stories and discussion. To ME it sounds like a great idea, but you know Mom and her memories of her own family better than I.
Hope you will let us know what she decides and how it goes.
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Look at it with her and see how she reacts. Don’t expect too much. Don’t leave it with her if you are afraid she will damage it.

When my DH aunt was 90, I made her a new album with all the people in her family who were still living. I asked each person to send me a current photo of themself. Just a selfie. I included one of each person in younger years beside the current one. This way aunt had a better chance of knowing who they were was my idea. She spent a lot of time looking at the album. Unless they were someone she saw often, she really couldn’t identify them. Slowly she lost interest at looking at it on her own but enjoyed when someone came by who wanted to see the album. She enjoyed looking at it with them and hearing them say the names. The names were familiar, if not the photos. The album gave them both something to focus on. Later I added photos of both her 80th and 90th parties to the album which she also enjoyed. Amazing how many of the people who were at those parties are gone now. People much younger than her.
I would encourage you to take a calm moment and take a visit with her down memory lane. If you have someone who has a phone, ask them to video you and your mom looking at the album together. You could video her looking at it if she is able to do it alone. When you look at the video you might find it to be a treasure for your own memories.

And about being new at this, we all are as “this” is constantly changing. The main thing you need to know is that if you don’t take very good care of yourself, you won’t be able to care for her. Your life is speeding by as you usher her out of her own. Make it a good life for both of you for as long as you choose.
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LisaSF Jul 2022
Your life is speeding by as you usher her out of her own. Make it a good life for both of you for as long as you choose.

What a beautiful, important sentiment. Thank you.
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I hung many pictures of my mom's family in her room in the ALF. I framed them and used a P-touch to label them with the name of the person and how they were related to her. I visit every day and there is not a day that she does not reference the photos and talk about her memories. I think it jogs her memory about places and people. I was afraid it would make her sad but I think it has really helped her connect to her past and remember.
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Please do share the album with her. Stay present, and you will hear some good stories. Maybe help her to label photos. Promise you there will be good conversation. Have Kleenex, ( for you- some of the stories will be sad and some hilarious.)
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Absolutely give it to her to look at!

Many people lose their short term memory, but their long-term memory is pretty good. My mother thought it was 1944 for much of the last year of her life, and she not only thought she was still in high school, she FELT like she was 16 again. She was oblivious to all her ailments, and I was happy for her, even though it also meant she didn't have a daughter (me).
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