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He has had 2 blood transfusions. Dr says he can't do procedures on him he has had a previous stroke and has had a catheter for 5 years plus his dementia is getting worse. He was very confused today. He has been in the hospital 2 times in the past 10 days. Dr says bleeding will reoccur.

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The Dr is absolutely right. The preparation for any tests would be far too much for your Dad. Now is the time to just ensure he remains comfortable. You are doing the best possible thing for him so do not doubt yourself just love and support him.
Blessings for you and your Dad
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Fefeann, I'm sorry that you are facing this.
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Oh, my. Those doubts are with most all of us. We love and care for our family and even though our BRAINS know we're doing right by them, our hearts whisper in our ears. We just don't want them to leave.

What WOULD be wrong would be to subject your tired old dad to all sorts of pokes and prods, uncomfortable procedures, etc etc while you tried to drown out that whisper. Hugs.
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Yes, it sounds right. He's 88 years old...his journey is close to over. Listen to his doctor. Doctors don't make that recommendation lightly. I'm so sorry for your family.
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Is your father currently in the Hospital? What is his mental state? What are his other medical problems, besides the history of stroke?

I'm thinking that the doctor is thinking that the anesthesia she will need to administer to find the bleed will wreak havoc with dad's dementia and is not worth the risk of another stroke. Is it time to keep Dad comfortable and not treat any longer?
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Yes, the advice to put him on hospice care sounds right to me.
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Dear Fefeann - I went through something very similar with my mother. It got to the point where undergoing the diagnostic procedures to achieve a diagnosis were academic and possibly dangerous for her to undergo.

By that, I mean - once a diagnosis is rendered, the necessary cure (ie) drugs or surgery were not feasible as her heart would probably not have been able to withstand it - and would only hasten her death and make her final days more uncomfortable for her. Bless your heart.
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This brochure has some helpful information that might be useful. Page 23 starts addressing you issue.

avoidablecare/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Sharpe-Handbook-A-Caregivers-Guide-to-Advance-Dementia.pdf
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Keep checking back with us, we are here to support you through this difficult time.
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It sounds like your dad has a lot of medical issues that are beyond his body's ability to heal, even if he were a younger man. The recommendation for hospice sounds right on to me. And you sound like a wonderful, caring daughter who has treated both of your parents with all of the love and care they could hope for. Keep your dad comfortable and enjoy your remaining time with him. He's lucky to have you in his corner.
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