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On your profile you wrote: "I am caring for my father dick, who is 90 years old, living at home with age-related decline, alzheimer's / dementia, cancer, incontinence, and mobility problems."

He's 90, has cancer, and Alzheimer's. Not eating is normal at the end of life. Force-feeding him is not appropriate whereas pleasure feeding is fine. It may be time to get him a palliative care consult and talk about hospice. Focus on his quality of life for whatever time he has left.
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jeannegibbs Aug 2021
I agree. No force feeding! Pleasure feeding is fine. This is definitely true during hospice care, but I think it applies earlier on, too. Before that I'd emphasize the "pleasure" aspect. Even when my husband didn't feel hungry he enjoyed a milkshake with ice cream, chocolate syrup or a fruit, and an envelope of Carnation Breakfast. And when he ate most savory food he slathered it with siracha or other hot sauce, so he could at least taste it. Make it pleasant to eat!

On hospice my husband enjoyed popsicles. This also helped keep him hydrated.
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Older people do seem to lose weight and it's mainly because they don't eat as much as they use too.

1st have Dr check Dad out to make sure he gets a clean bill of health.

After Dr visit, start feeding Dad high calorie foods.

Add a can or 2 of a Meal Replacement Drink like Ensure, ect to his daily food intake but the ones with the most calories.

My Dad's Dr said they started feeding his Grandfather Brownies every day.

Old people can't taste like they use to and seems they Iike anything sweet.
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Not eating or reduced eating, is not a good sign. Please have him checked by his primary care physician. Buy some Boost or Ensure nutritional drinks for weight gain. Try ice cream and other treats. Make sure you eat with him. It helps a lot.
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Dementia does not cause weight loss. Please get your father evaluated by a doctor. He may have developed diabetes or another gastrointestinal tract issue.
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jeannegibbs Aug 2021
I think that dementia does indeed indirectly cause weight loss. But so do many other things, and it is always a good idea to have any changes evaluated by a medical professional.
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There are high calorie meal replacement shakes or puddings that you can give him that will help keep his calories up
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If he is eating healthy amounts of food, no it is not normal.

Bring it up with his doctor, for sure.

https://www.agingcare.com/topics/170/weight-loss
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No it’s not normal. Sudden and extreme weight loss without intention of it is a sigh of cancer, please check with your doctor immediately.
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Sle247365 Aug 2021
Not eating and weight loss go hand in hand. No calories = weight loss. To imply it's cancer may be jumping the gun. If ANYONE is inactive from illness, depression, loneliness or a host of other issues could be the culprit.
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he could have diabetes..he needs a full medical examination. there are many causes for weight loss.
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I’m caring for my 95 year old father with dementia. His taste buds seem to only tolerate sweets and everything else is yucky. As per his dietitian, I give him 4/8oz boxes daily of Resource 2 made by Nestle. It is the same formula given for tube feeding so it accounts for 💯 of his dietary needs and anything else he eats is just pleasure. He doesn’t have a G tube so he drinks with a straw. To be clear, this NOT a supplement, it is full nutrition. I would check with a dietitian for the correct amount your loved one would need. This has been such a godsend for me since I no longer have to worry about him getting enough nutrition and just takes one worry off my plate. He has lost no weight since we started a year ago not to mention not having to plead with him to eat! Just recently, we have been getting an equivalent from VA called TwoCal HN 2.0 which is wonderful so no more out of pocket for it.
Prayers for you both.
Lori
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Yes it is normal.i have sever dementia.i eat and I'm losing weight as will. Going into the end stage.right now I'm in the late stage.of it . going into the thick of it .not easy .and I'm losing my ability to walk.and also talking.and etc.so yes it is normal.
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karenchaya Aug 2021
My dear friend whom I have not met, I cried when I read your answer. Please know that you are loved by SO MANY people you have not ever even met. I believe I speak for ALL of us when I say WE CARE about you and will have good thoughts for you. Please let us know how you are doing from time to time. You can reach me on Facebook, also. Karen Kleinman. I am SO PROUD of you for being a FIGHTER and SURVIVOR. This is not easy what you are going through. THANK YOU so much for taking the time to share your story. Much love. Kar.
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