I hate bullies. Document every incident and don't keep silent, having a bigot in a position of power will encourage others with prejudices to be bolder. Do you have allies in the AL, is there a resident's council?
To me, You have to absolutely be prepared to go nuclear if need be... - do a list of time & date and what was said - record the interactions, if that means that you need to have family visit and it’s them that need to record stuff on their phones then do that - doing the above allows you to be proactive & in control of your emotion in all this. She is baiting you & wants/needs you to act out so she can be all “see he’s a crazy Muslim /Mexican /Negro whatever....” - contact the ombudsman with the info, hold off for not mentioning any recording exists
Recording will be central in all this, otherwise it’s all he said/she said and unless your states ombudsman system has power, will go nowhere except to cast you as an agitator. Gotta have it on tape. If your is a 2 party state, how you can likely get around it is that your recording it as well as other discussions so that you can refer back to to better understand what was discussed. Can’t use in court per se, but can use & share......
the suggestion of contacting the ombudsman is excellent. That would be the first step imho. BUT if that doesn’t resolve the situation, then it’s onto Plan B which means scorched earth nuclear with removal of the director and diversity training of all staff. Remember: This AL does not exist in a vacuum; This AL is required to have certain permits or certifications in order to operate. And all those have regulated oversight boards within city, county or state government. ALs have different sources of funding which means accountability; This director of the AL does not own this facility, they are subject to accountability from the owners or board of directors, who in turn are accountable to whomever regulates them and pays them.
For funding, Whether it’s coming from MediCARE (which is federally funded so all federal discrimination laws apply), or from LTC insurance (like Genworth who has investors, shareholders, etc and so do not want to have their payments associated or going to any facility that discriminates as it’s bad PR), none of these want to be associated with a facility that discriminates. And if Letters need to go to CMS (Medicare), the big 4 LTC insurers, state regulatory boards, etc. that’s stuff imho that you will need help with. There will be some sort of organization that takes these issues on for Muslims, I’d ask at wherever would be your mosque. Like for me, if I had had to deal with this for my late mom, I would have contacted MALDEF for a starting point as they deal with Hispanic accessibility & discrimination issues. Good luck!
Like Igloos suggestions but I would go up the line. How did you get in if the director was prejudice?
In my area the ALs are own by Companies, one by a set of local doctors. Go over Directors head to his boss. In your packet info there should be this info. Call in your complaint and follow up with a letter sending it Certified mail. You may want to send it to the bosses boss too. Tell them if this is not followed thru on within a certain period of time, you will call the State Ombudsmen. If this facility gets Medicaid funding, they definately cannot discriminate. You don't need to tell the director what you are doing. Now if the director is the owner go directly to the Ombudsmen.
- do a list of time & date and what was said
- record the interactions, if that means that you need to have family visit and it’s them that need to record stuff on their phones then do that
- doing the above allows you to be proactive & in control of your emotion in all this. She is baiting you & wants/needs you to act out so she can be all “see he’s a crazy Muslim /Mexican /Negro whatever....”
- contact the ombudsman with the info, hold off for not mentioning any recording exists
Recording will be central in all this, otherwise it’s all he said/she said and unless your states ombudsman system has power, will go nowhere except to cast you as an agitator. Gotta have it on tape. If your is a 2 party state, how you can likely get around it is that your recording it as well as other discussions so that you can refer back to to better understand what was discussed. Can’t use in court per se, but can use & share......
the suggestion of contacting the ombudsman is excellent. That would be the first step imho. BUT if that doesn’t resolve the situation, then it’s onto Plan B which means scorched earth nuclear with removal of the director and diversity training of all staff.
Remember:
This AL does not exist in a vacuum;
This AL is required to have certain permits or certifications in order to operate. And all those have regulated oversight boards within city, county or state government.
ALs have different sources of funding which means accountability;
This director of the AL does not own this facility, they are subject to accountability from the owners or board of directors, who in turn are accountable to whomever regulates them and pays them.
For funding, Whether it’s coming from MediCARE (which is federally funded so all federal discrimination laws apply), or from LTC insurance (like Genworth who has investors, shareholders, etc and so do not want to have their payments associated or going to any facility that discriminates as it’s bad PR), none of these want to be associated with a facility that discriminates. And if Letters need to go to CMS (Medicare), the big 4 LTC insurers, state regulatory boards, etc. that’s stuff imho that you will need help with. There will be some sort of organization that takes these issues on for Muslims, I’d ask at wherever would be your mosque. Like for me, if I had had to deal with this for my late mom, I would have contacted MALDEF for a starting point as they deal with Hispanic accessibility & discrimination issues. Good luck!
In my area the ALs are own by Companies, one by a set of local doctors. Go over Directors head to his boss. In your packet info there should be this info. Call in your complaint and follow up with a letter sending it Certified mail. You may want to send it to the bosses boss too. Tell them if this is not followed thru on within a certain period of time, you will call the State Ombudsmen. If this facility gets Medicaid funding, they definately cannot discriminate. You don't need to tell the director what you are doing. Now if the director is the owner go directly to the Ombudsmen.