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I think “wanting her to die is a message that you’re exhausted and want to get on with your own life. You don’t want to go down with the ship, Who would? And that’s completely understandable. My father died from Alzheimer’s and people wondered why we weren’t crying more over him. The reality was we’d been crying for years. Rivers were overflowing with our tears. We were so relieved that our lives were no longer being bossed around by AD. And we were so horribly saddened when he died. So yes, it’s okay to express your feelings and grief. You’re being authentic. Take good care and be well.
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Cheeky79 Apr 28, 2024
I feel the same way. My husband has been battling Alzheimer's for the past
5 years. I have been his sole caregiver
and within a year he has gotten much worse. He has been losing weight rapidly even though he eats 3 meals a day and now is just totally confused about everything. I am so exhausted and I feel the same way. There is no
quality of life for him or me. Its just
watching your loved one waste away.
So I know how people feel when they
wish for them not to be on this earth
anymore. I just don't get it. That is when
I question everything in life. Wishing all
the moms a happy mothers day.
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My mother has been a wonderful mother, and yet I pray daily that she will die peacefully in her sleep before she reaches the later stages of dementia. I do feel guilty about it, yet I would pray the same thing for myself and would want others to pray for me if I were in her situation.
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Anxietynacy May 2, 2024
Beautifully said
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My husband and I prepaid our cremation expenses 25 years ago, but I may look into the parting stones thing. I agree--much easier to toss a stone into the ocean or nearby waterway. Totally eliminates "blowback".

OMG, indeed, about obesity and the too-small crematorium doors. Prompts me to think of a variation to the old schoolyard rhyme: "Person, person 2 x 4--can't fit through that final door!" Gallows humor!?
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sp196902 May 2, 2024
They have to cut up the body if it is too big for cremation.
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