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My father died almost 4 months ago and my mom still has the picture boards we created for his viewing/funeral all over the house. It depresses me so much I hate to go over there. I guess it makes her feel better but I'm not sure. Should I say how I feel or just hope she puts them away sty some point?

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If it bothers you, I think you could invite her to visit you at your house, or take her out for coffee.

I'm sorry that her method of mourning is not compatible with hers, and you are entitled to honor your own feelings about this. But please don't tell Mom how she should handle her feelings. Try to find a way to be together than suits you both.
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I wondering if you can say, perhaps over the phone, in a neutral tone, "mom, you let me know when you want some help getting those pictures of dad back into the albums" and leave it at that.
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Give your mother the space she needs to grieve, in her own way. The photos are apparently bothering you, not her, and it is her house. Remember, she knew and lived with him longer than you and it will take her awhile to grieve in the manner she chooses. Just don't look at the photos.

I think the photos are upsetting you more than the fact that your mother has them on display. Perhaps you should also allow yourself more grieving time, in your own way. Give both of you space for this mourning process.
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It's mom's house. Leave her alone and get over it. If they're still up in a year, help her lovingly pack them away.

The loss of a spouse is devastating. Unless you've walked that path, you can't begin to understand the sense of loss one feels. You have lost a father. SHE has lost her whole life.

I've heard it said that the greatest gift parents can give their children is to love each other all of their lives. Sounds like you've been given that gift. Now give mom a precious gift back -- don't put your feelings over hers for the few hours you spend with her in her home. Let her grieve in her own way.
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Wornout, you came here for opinions on how to handle this delicate situation. Maggie's advice seems no harsher than many others, including my own. You say that your mother is overly sensitive? Perhaps you should give some thought to your own tendencies.
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Thank you. She is so sensitive and will take what I say as a criticism so I have to be so careful. I just keep hoping she will say hey, can you help me get these photos back in the albums? It breaks my heart to see all those pictures every day. The pain is still too fresh for me.
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WornOut, do you know the reason behind wearing black arm bands and other outward symbols of mourning? It was really a warning to others -- "I've recently had a major loss in my life, and my emotions may not be stable." Been there, felt that!

You say that your mother is overly sensitive, and it appears you may be, too. That is OK -- give yourselves time and things will gradually arrive at a new normal. This is a tough period for you both.
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So sorry for your loss, WornOutDaughter.
Here is another perspective with regards to the funeral photos: There is a difference between pictures of Dad vs. pictures of the funeral. INMOP.
You can help Mom out by having a few good pictures of Dad placed in frames, telling Mom, we won't forget him. Put away the funeral pictures, a sad event to be sure. It is normal to grieve one's own way, but I've seen some unhealthy focus on death of a loved one, pictures of the deceased shared with everyone, for a very long time. Share pictures of when he was alive. I understand.
If we here in this community did not have MaggieMarshall posting, we would have no one posting the truth to shock us back to reality. Take what you want, and leave the rest. I am positive she did not mean just get over your Dad's death.
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You say your Mom has Alzheimers. Invite some ladies over to help frame the photos, have a luncheon. Buy a beautiful box to place the funeral photos in. Be sure to frame some photos of you, Mom, and other family, placing them out so she can remember. Certain rituals or planned events can help all of us in the grieving process and create new memories. Take new pictures at the new gathering. You can do this, after getting some rest.
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Wornout, Maggie did not mean get over the loss of your father - she meant get over your mom having pictures up. They probably comfort her; even though you wish they were not there, I think you probably should not try to take that away from her.
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