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Grandmother was discharged from rehab facility on Wednesday. I spoke to many workers there and said she isnt physically ready to come home. The nurse prqctioner (who was her "doctor" there) told me she is doing great and ready to go home. She was there originally because she had her gallbladder removed. Then she contracted C diff. She is a danger to herself. She has cataracts in both eyes; can barely see, is extremely weak, can barely walk. She fell today. Had to have the fire dept come and pick her up. Fell just 4 days after being discharged. I'm her granddaughter who is taking care of her. She needs more help than I can give. She needs help going to the bathroom, taking showers, eating, supervision when walking. If her vision was good then it wouldn't be so hard to care for her. Since she's weak and can't see, she needs monitoring that I can't possibily give her. I was wondering if there is some place she can stay and get care until she gets the cataracts removed. Thank you.

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Please contact your social services and ask them to do a welfare check. They would have some clout and should be able to help you help her.
Take care and thanks for being so thoughtful.
Carol
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I agree, grandmom needs to go to a nursing home. It is simply too dangerous for her to remain home. Try not to get too down on yourself...I have had many clients who do very well in nursing homes. Without deceiving her let her know that the situation is temporary and that she needs to work hard in PT so she can leave. Always give her hope.

Once she gains strength she may be able to successfully transition to an assisted living facility. It is doubtful she will be going back home permanently...it will simply too expensive to provide the level of care she will need.

If money is an issue you should look into public benefits immediately. Medicaid will cover the nursing home cost. If you apply by the end of any given month benefits for facility care will be retroactive to the first of the month assuming she is otherwise eligible.

Many states, Florida among and New York among them, have a "transition" program, also covered by Medicaid, to assist those who would like to move from a nursing home to assisted living if they are able. In this instance Medicaid pays a monthly stipend to the beneficiary to help cover room and board.

Was grandmom or her husband a veteran? She may be eligible to receive over $1,000 per month to help defray the cost of nursing home, assisted living, or home care.
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Hi, Angie,
You are so good to your grandmother! Please take care of yourself too. You must be quite a bit younger than I am because you are the granddaughter of this elderly lady. If at your age, you are having trouble keeping up with the demands of her care, that tells me that she may indeed be ready for a nursing home. Once you get to your own limits, you can really feel it. And it sounds like you are there, or close to it. There is nothing to feel guilty about if it is simply time for your grandmother to enter a place where she can get skilled nursing round-the-clock care. All the best to you as you manage your grandma's care.
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I like what Anne said above, "once you get to your own limits, you can feel it." Well said!

My Mother is still in her own apt. She is okay for now, but everyday I wonder when I will have to make that decision to continue trying to care for her in her home (what she wants) or consider other alternatives. I am capable of handling everyday things for her (which is a LOT), but when it comes to medical/safety issues, I will always do what is in her best interests.

I can tell that you a wonderful, caring grand-daughter. Sometimes these things have a way of working out for the best. But do not be afraid to be assertive with these agencies, etc. They are often overburdened and sometimes you have to be a "squeaky wheel."

I wish you the best.
Lilli
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MindingOurElders-
Thank you so much for your response. It means a lot. She has Home Health Care since she's been discharged. A nurse comes every three days to check her vitals and her coumadin status. Then a physical therapist twice a week, who came yesterday to meet her and establish my grandmother's level of ability to move around. The physical therapist asked my grandmother to take to steps forward and two steps back while using her walker. My grandmother couldn't even do that. So the physical therapist said, "If she falls one more time, then it's back to rehab." I just can't believe it. Why wait until she falls again? In fact, the reason why I'm up this early (grandmother usually sleeps for two more hours) is because she tried to use our bathroom at home by herself, which the PT told her not to do. I woke up to her screaming, "help me help Angie, I'm going to fall." I flew off of my bed, laptop goes crashing on the floor and I just about twist my ankle going to help her. She tried going to the bathroom with my help yesterday and we just about made it back to her bedroom when her legs almost gave out. That was so scary. My hands were literally trembling after I put her in bed. So I'm waiting on the social service lady to call me back today to see if the rehab place will let her back in. After being with my grandmother at home since Wednesday, I'm afraid I'm going to have no other option but to place her in a nursing home(at least for a while, until she gets the strength to come home) if the rehab facility doesn't let her back in. The thought of putting her there makes me very ill because I swore I would never do it. I'm afraid if she goes to the nursing home she will just give up. I don't want to do it. But I can't have her sneeking around and possibile injuring herself while I'm asleep/cooking/in the bathroom.

So if you've read all this so far. Thank you. I guess I'm going to have to play the waiting game and see if she can be readmitted to rehab. Even though the place already discharged her when she couldn't even walk. What a great rehabilitation facility!
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Thank you anne123, Lilliput, and RalphRobbinsCFP for the kind words, support and helpful advice!
I'm new to this website so I'm not sure if you all will see this comment.
The wonderful social service woman was able to get my grandmother into a nursing home/rehab facility. At the place she's going to, they have permanent beds for people living there and they also have rehab beds for seniors that are staying short term for rehab. The rehab place faxed the paper work to my grandmother's primary care doctor. So now I'm waiting on him to tell us to go ahead and admit her to rehab or if he wants to see her first at his office. Only problem is that her appointment isn't until Friday and the rehab facility only has one bed available. So I'm praying that the bed will still be available if we have to wait until Friday to see the doctor.

Lilliput you are right. I'm on the same page with you as to being able to help out with everyday issues. But now her safety is being comprimised and I just can't have that. It makes me feel awful that I can't care for her like I want to. But the new rehab place is the best for both of us at this time. I'm praying that she recovers quickly and can come back home to live with me. Because before she had her gallbladder removed on Feb 2nd, she was doing just fine at home. No safety risks. She could walk just fine. Heck, she could even speed walk if she wanted to. :) I'm pretty sure once she gets her vision and strength back, she will be coming back home. That's the plan for now anyway. If she's not capable of coming back home then we'll discuss other options.
She successfully healed and recovered from a 5 bypass heart operation back in 06. I know she was younger then, but her strength before that operation was the same as her strength before she had her gallbladder taken out in Feb of this year. That is what gives me hope that she will recover. :)

And yes Anne123, unfortunately I'm at the breaking point. If I was 100% healthy I think I might be able to do more. I'm 23 years old, I have a extremely painful strain on my left side, my thyroid is enlarged which causes me all kinds of trouble and I'm the only one family member that can care (or maybe I should say, wants to care) for her. Sometimes I wish I was married and had a husband to confide in and help out with things. But that's not the case.

RalphRobbinsCFP, thank you again for all the helpful advice. When my grandfather passed away, my grandmother was able to get some type of monthly pay from the VA. He made sure she would be taken care of finicially. It isn't much but it's enough for her to live comfortably.

I just can't thank you all enough for your kindness and great advice. I know it sounds silly but this website (and all the kind people) keeps me from feeling so alone.
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Angie, so glad we could help. You don't say how old your grandmother is, but I assume she's getting up there if you are 23. From what I've seen with the elder parents of my friends and with my own parents, one thing for sure......Their level of strength and health is generally going to keep on declining. Yes, your grandmother may recover from this bout of ill health, but there will still be health concerns and demands for you to take care of. I would just advise you to get counsel from your social worker, Grandmom's doctor, etc. prior to any decision to have her move back into your home. You sure sound like a sweetie!
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Anyone who has had a loved one in a nursing home, knows that may not necessarily be any safer or any better. They can have their own issues with safety and care. Technically, I believe I am much more attentive to my Mother's needs. She is the only one I'm caring for and I have a more vested interest. It really comes down to a personal decision on what each of us can handle. I too am looking for some additional financial assistance. Local DSS here in NY wants to cut her food stamp budget and other services because I live with her. I do not have a job, but have a rental property so they automatically assume I have plenty of money. I certainly wish that were true.
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Anyone who has had a loved one in a nursing home, knows that may not necessarily be any safer or any better. They can have their own issues with safety and care. Technically, I believe I am much more attentive to my Mother's needs. She is the only one I'm caring for and I have a more vested interest. It really comes down to a personal decision on what each of us can handle. I too am looking for some additional financial assistance. Local DSS here in NY wants to cut her food stamp budget and other services because I live with her. I do not have a job, but have a rental property so they automatically assume I have plenty of money. I certainly wish that were true.
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Actually, it just sounds like she was sent home too early form the previous rehab. I would think she could indeed be readmitted for another subacute rehab - I'm assuming that's where she was, as usually an NP cannot manage a case independently in an acute rehab, which might be the better option if you can get her qualified. They have to be able to do 3 hours a day of therapies for that. The Health South facility in my area accepted my mom and her stay was covered under the appropriate diagnoses, which in her case included Parkinsonism. A really good rehab whether subacute or acute would have done a home eval and had recs for equipment such as grab bars, bath chair, commode rails. etc. for someone at risk for falls, AND shown some expertise in low vision. Many "nursing home" (aka skilled nusring facilities) do the subacture rehab, not all of them have the word "rehabiliation" in their official facility name but most do. And many people go back home from those programs, at least the better ones that don't run a cookie-cutter kind of deal that accomplishes little for the person servied while making money for the program. You might have to push for a family meeting and make sure they are really aware of the right goals and needs for her. I have been stunned by how little help the SW and d/c planner will actualy provide until and unless you make it VERY clear that you need more help. Sending her home with nursing visits every 3 days was clearly bad discharge planning. And absolutely, bless you for taking good care of Grandma!
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