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Not sure what is the correct topic.. Here I go:


Aunt was re-evaluated for Palliative Care. The nurses and doctors visit her in her facility, so she doesn't have to stress out about getting to her appointments. Very nice lady... Very sweet... And then the questions came:


Is she ambulatory? can she walk with cane, walker? No, she is not capable.
Does she have long or short term memory? Can she express herself? Is she happy? How long does she sleep during the day? How is her apetite? Does she eat alot? Bowel movements good? Toiletry.. Can she go on her own? No? Diapers. Can she feed herself? Kinda... she can hold a cookie.
Can she swallow? after her stroke she can swollow but worried about choking somewhat.. blended foods. does she complain, is she happy? etc.
She/we passed. She gets palliative care.. How often does she need someone? Once every 2 weeks... That should be okay for now...


If your LO is ambulatory, do take them out, let them see the outside. Take them with you if you can to grocery store, library, picking up the kids.. Just a little once in a while goes a long way... I used to put moms hands on the grocery cart next to my hands, and then I would tell her we are driving, and she has to steer this clunker away from the displays.. and I would talk with her, and count with her...It is so important... And do you know what else? People will see this, and it gives hope, be kind, patient, and love them...As dad would say: This will not last forever... He was right... Patience goes a long way... Breathe,,, count to 10 with your loved ones. If they start complaining.. just tell them to count with you... 1...1... 2...2...3...3...4...4.. up to 10.. Then remind them, Now we count backwards... 10... 10.., 9..9... 8...8.. and you may notice things will calm down a bit... refocused on numbers helps sometimes...
Mary stopped yelling and counted with me as the nurse was evaluating my aunt. The room was quiet long enough for nurse to do her job...

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This is where definitions vary by location. Palliative Care in Canada is very similar to Hospice Care in the USA.

Loosely, Palliative care is provided by Hospice and is end of life care.

Hospice has a greater role in helping the patient and their family prepare for death, they provide counseling, therapeutic massage, friendly visitors, group after death grief support and in my community are building a Hospice House where people can die with professional care, but outside of a hospital or their home.
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cwillie Dec 2019
Yes, as far as I know the separation of hospice and palliative care is a uniquely American thing.
There have been a lot of Hospice facilities being built around my area too Tothill, they are adding such a wonderful option for those who are able to remain in the community until their final weeks.
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Palliative care is not the same as hospice care. Hospice recognizes that a patient is dying, that is, has 6 months or fewer to live. Palliative care can be given when a patient has no limit on how long they are expected to live. The quality of life is measured, and with the agreement of patient and family that there is very little quality of life, the decision can be made to withhold life sustaining measures such as tube feedings and etc. Treatments are given for symptoms, not with hope of cure.
So while they are similar, Hospice does give more care, whereas palliative is more a "philosophical approach" to care ongoing.
I do so agree, that whatever type care a patient and family choose at the end of life, things that are enjoyable should continue when and where they may, problems such as pain should be addressed, and life should go by quality, not quantity.
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Is there a question in all that MAYDAY or are you just chatting?
In my part of the world palliative care is synonymous with hospice care, mom was eligible when her doctor decided she was and got the ball rolling, the only qualifying question on the intake papers that stands out was "would you be surprised if she died in the next six months".
I think most caregivers do start out with the goal to give them a good life among people who love them and truly care. While your dad might have been right that "This will not last forever" unfortunately it can last far longer and become a much heavier burden than you ever dreamed or can bear.
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MAYDAY Dec 2019
I was more chatting than asking.... My dad would get me up to go running... Little things.. as in life will not last forever. Appreciate what I was doing... and he was correct.

As far as my aunt.. Palliative care, was not for the next 6 months.. here 6 months is more for Hospice care..

Palliative care, from what I notice, is to help the patient and caretaker in the area of getting them to the doctor... Palliative care, the doctor /or nurse goes to the patient..

Believe me... as Mrs. Reagan, Nancy, said.. ALZ if the longest goodbye...

As we get older.. we experience issues more, or more often with our LO's, friends, relatives, etc...
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