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aunt sleeps most of the day away...will wake to use restroom and eat then goes right back to bed..then will get up around 3 or 4 in the afternoon and start calling us (mom and I) every 2-5 minutes....I wish she would stay up to see the day but then again she is on the phone the whole time she is up, very confused until about 7 or 8.....she takes one lowest dose ativan at bedtime....afraid if she doesn't take it she will be frantic and agitated like before she started taking it...she started to go into others apts. etc..looking for things that were "stolen"...told that her behavior couldn't be tolerated as it is considered wandering and just not acceptable, which we totally understand, so Dr. prescribed ativan....i guess my question is, are we doing the right thing? should we move her to nursing home? when do you know it is time? she will have really bad days and some nights and then will be real good for a day here and there....

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I would say it is time to move your aunt. And I would also have her medications evaluated. My mil was on Ativan and her behavior was worse....so we discontinued it. Something else might be in order. Are you certain she is not taking more medication than she should and that's why her sleep pattern is so odd? When dementia kicks in, our loved one don't always know or remember if and when they have taken their daily medication, so they tend to take it at odd hours or take more than they should. I finally had to take over the meds for my mil as she would get up around 2am and take her morning meds, then tell me I was a liar and never gave the a.m. meds to her......oh my. Sometimes, intervention is needed, and although we don't want to do it, it's unavoidable.
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What does the staff at the ALF say about your aunt's situation? Do they feel that they can continue to meet her needs, or does she need more care than they are prepared to provide?

Sleeping nearly around the clock CAN be a sign of entering the final stage. If that is the case I highly recommend involving Hospice.
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Ativan is not a good drug for an elderly person to be on continously. Please have her meds re-evaluated!
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I agree with the Ativan comments. My Mom used to take Lorazapan (which I think is the same as Ativan). She took it now and then for anxiety feelings. It helped her. But when her dementia set in, I noticed that when I would give her the Loraz, she actually got worse. She acted really strange, even hallucinating one time. I stopped the Loraz after reading about those particular drugs w/ the elderly. It's not a good drug for their anxiety. The Dr. can help with a better one to help your aunt, I'm sure. Good luck.
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My elderly aunt is legally blind and also wears hearing aids. She can't live alone anymore, but refuses to go to an assisted living facility. I'm been her primary caregiver for the last six months. How can I get her to go?
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just an update on my aunt....I transfered her to another assisted living facility but she is in a secured unit. She is slowly getting use to it but is still having a problem with not being able to leave without an escort. She will not be able to live there long as her funds will run out in about 14 months. At that time she will have to enter a nursing home and go on Medicaid. It is a shame that Assisted Living does not accept Medicaid and the only recourse is a nursing facility. I don't understand that. It is much more expensive for the state to pay for a skilled nursing facility than an ALF..her medications are the same except now she takes 50 mg of Seraquel (SP?) at bedtime and the ativan as needed for anxiety
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Gayle189, I don't think it is the state that won't pay for ALF. It is the ALF that won't accept the Medicaid payments. We found a nice one here that does take Medicaid. I know of several others that will take Medicaid after the resident is self-pay for a certain length of time.
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