We discovered mum had dementia after moving her and dad in with us. Prior to the move, she told us results form NueroPsych testing showed Mild TBI and no Alzheimers! Come to find out she never read the report or a doctor didn't explain it to her properly. She was diagnosed with Major Cognitive Impairment in February 2017, and recommended psychological treatment, medication, and an NP re-evaluation in Feb 2018. She did none of these things. The report indicated that she was not able to take care of her ADLs and needed 8 hours of in-home care 7 days a week. Needless to say, my wife and I were shocked and confused about what to do. We share a new PCP and she ordered a follow-up NP assessment to take place next month.
Dad is either experiencing cognitive decline himself or using denial as a tool for self-preservation. He just thinks mum is sensitive and gets upset with us when she complains that we are "bullying" her. Mum's behavior is unpredictable going from sweet to nasty, energetic to "sick" from some new ailment, and spending hundreds of dollars of limited resources on the internet to self-medicate. We are afraid to talk to dad about what we know because we don't want to upset him either!
My wife has brothers that live out of the country that are not currently involved in their care but two of them hold power of attorney. As far as we know, they are as much in the dark about mum's condition as we were. Where do we stand legally? Are we allowed to tell them what we know?
Where can we go for support? The stress and tension we are suffering is not healthy!