I lived in the second floor my landloard lives downstairs..last nite at 1145pm my landlord called asking if I can come dowstairs and of course I did.. Omg as soon as I opened my door the smell was terrible.. her husband (dementia) pooped all over. He had pooped in his face, hair, pooped all over the kitchen floor omg was a nightmare. They don't have kids. They are very nice people but I don't have the stomach for that..I told her I'm sorry I can't help you with that.. she started crying. I ended up bathing the guy, guy was fighting me tried to clean him as much as I could.. saw his private parts omggg such an awkward moment I never ever had to deal with a situation of that nature..and again this is my landloard not my father or family. I was trying to cover him with a towel but I just couldn't he kept on fighting me...Cleaned her floors... I'm traumatized!! Please help.
Is there a 24/7 aid # that we can call? She will pay to take care of stuff like that. I am afraid that if this happens again she will call me. I feel bad!! Can she call the ambulance for that? I just don't have a heart to let her cry but I just can't do that..again.. don't have the stomach for it. And she wanted my kids to help.. told her please never call my kids for this. I felt bad when I said that but idk. I don't wnt to put my kids in that situation. What you guys think? Again this is my landlord not a family member (even if it was a family member or parent I don't think I will be able to do this. My respect for people that do it for their parents. I will def hire an aide if the moment comes).. I tried to do my best to help but don't want to this ever happen again. Please need some advise.
It was very good of you to help her through this crisis but do not let her carry on regardless and cross her fingers. If she plans to continue to care for her husband at home she needs proper support, and if you're TOO nice about what's happened you'll give her an excuse not to go out and find it. Be sympathetic and understanding, but do not just shrug it off.
I think you need to have a sit down with the landlord and tell her honestly that she can not rely on you or your family to fill the gaps in her care plan. I do feel for her as she is in a difficult place, there are no agencies who can provide this kind of unscheduled assistance and a disaster such as this doesn't really warrant calling EMS. She needs enlist her friends and family to be her back-up, and if that isn't an option she may need to bite the bullet and look into a facility - either way it's not your circus and you need to make that very clear to her.
I can't currently give you any direct advice except for encouraging you to speak to your local town Senior Center, which should be able to gear you up with links and support (and recommendations).
It sounds like they need a homecare giver for her husband. Poor guy as well as wife. Best of luck.