Hello! I work at an ALF for seniors with alzheimer's and dementia. I have learned a lot in the past 6 months of working here, but there are a couple behaviors I still struggle with, namely repetitive questions from one of my residents.
He is obsessed with knowing when he will see his daughter. She comes to see him every Saturday morning, but we just tell him he will see her 'in the morning' when he asks, which is about every 60-80 seconds. He can still read, so we have also made him a little sign that says when he will see his daughter.
His questions have started to come every minute or so instead of every 5 or 10 and he gets very aggravated if you don't answer him immediately or if he thinks you aren't telling the truth. Then he will proceed to ask everyone else over and over again to verify what you told him.
Lately his behavior has also been much more aggressive, and he's getting in pointless fights with other innocent residents because of imagined slights.
I'm doing my best to be patient, and I just want him to feel comfortable. We have talked to his daughter about it but she doesn't seem very concerned, and we don't like giving meds unless absolutely necessary to calm severe anxiety...
Any advice is welcome!! Thanks x
Don't lie, tell him Saturday morning.
Have checked for UTI, just recently saw a doctor. We have a behavior log on him as his aggression has been escalating over the months, not just recently.
It's hard to be patient, but answering repeated questions is on going and worsens. Tell him what day it is that day, and Saturday is when his daughter comes which is X number of days from that day.
*Just saw your response that he gets mad, and says that's too long to wait. If telling the truth nor telling his daughter helps, go with your gut feelings to keep him happy and not be upset. The main thing is he's safe, happy as possible, and not upset.
After you answer repeated questions honestly, it sometimes helps to change the subject so their focus is on something different. Maybe direct him to something he likes (maybe ask his daughter) that's going on where he lives that he can get involved with and with other people.
It seems to also help if they sleep a bit more, so whenever he's eaten, he should nap.
It may help if his daughter can visit more often, get more visitors for him if there are any, and get him involved/interested in more activities.