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Mom, 86 yrs old, wont have test suggested by doctor for mental health. Read about "show-timers" on this site. Need more info.

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Granny22978
see this article... My daddy does this all the time!!!!!
https://coping.today/what-does-showtime-mean/
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"ShowTiming", as I understand it, is when a senior actively tries their hardest to "put on a good show" for doctors, family/friends, caregivers etc, to cover up their growing disability and need for care. This behavior is shown by people both with and without dementia. They are angry and afraid of losing control over their lives, and will try to do or say anything to keep concerned people who KNOW they need help off their backs. In the case of dementia, you'll see the showtiming early on, while they're often actively in denial and think they can "fool" people into thinking everything's fine. After a while, with dementia, they'll often forget altogether that there is anything wrong with them at all, which is then anosognosia (no knowledge of illness).

Luckily, in most cases, it is obvious when a showtimer is "performing", but it's really frustrating that they think they're fooling anyone, and they keep it up, no matter how unconvincing. You'll think, "Really? Do we have to play this game?" It's really aggravating though, when the showtimer is able to fool certain factions, who then think that "group A", the people who know better, is not doing right by the showtimer.

In the early days of dementia, it's really fun when the person with ALZ really DOES kind of "fool" family and friends that are somewhat close, but don't live with them. With my Dad, who has ALZ, it was astounding to me that well-meaning people that do not live with, or even see or speak to my dad on a daily basis "knew" better than myself and my cousin, his live-in caregivers, where he was cognitively, and would try to tell US, "Oh, he's not that bad, I think you're exaggerating..." (?!?!?) Then, inevitably, once they start having more experiences with the person themselves, will they start to believe and accept. It took my aunt, my dad's sister, a good year or so before she believed he was having anything but "senior moments", and flat-out said the above, that we were exaggerating about his cognitive issues. It finally took two big mix-ups of his causing to illustrate the point to her that he has no idea what's happening around him, and if you want to know something, or he calls you for the 37th time to ask you to take him to do something, you have to ask US, do NOT take what he says at face value!!!!! I started calling her to give her updates on what was happening with him, and warn her of things that might pop up, things he'd been obsessing over to make sure she wouldn't believe what he was telling her. Then, she finally came to understand what was happening.

But believe you me, before the days of anosognosia with him, when I brought dad kicking and screaming to the neurologist for the very first time because of suspected dementia, boy, was it ever SHOW TIME! "There's nothing wrong with me! What's this all about?" And the neurologist, with just 2 questions from a mini-test, was able to see right through.
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DILKimba Apr 2019
Oh Lord yes! It is quite a show when the person(s) with the deficit try to convince everyone around them that they are just fine. That's when the deflecting and character assassination often begin of their care givers, to try and discredit the critics and gain support from those who have no interaction with them on a daily basis. It is very frustrating.
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My mother was a pro at this. It took my sister a good 3 years to see my mother wasn’t well, my brother still doesn’t completely believe it(5 years in). You can’t really change it unfortunately but it does catch up to them. My mother denies it all, accuses us of stealing her furniture ( same furniture that currently is sitting in her AL apartment) , her money etc. recently took her to the dr for evaluation . They asked about delusional behaviors, I tried to gently mention her belief that pigeons , robins and bugs live inside her apartment. She screamed she never said that , called me a liar. Within 5 mins of questioning she was telling the doc how seeds turned into bugs that then turned into birds , flew out of the litter box and bit the cat in the face lol. Medical personnel that actually deal with this stuff know the tricks. Just don’t go to her PCP if he/ she has been ignoring her behavior, go to a geriatric neurologist
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