What do I do about my mother refusing to bathe?

Call a caregiving agency and ask if the Agency has a "bath aide". These caregivers come in just to bath a client, and have years of experience on knowing the best way to have an elder interested in bathing.

We also need to remember as we age, showers and bathtubs are a major place to fall. So an elder becomes scared to bathe or shower. Some are very shy about having a family member help where a "bath aide" is more accepted.

Make sure Mom has solid grab bars in and around the bath tub for her to grab onto. A rubber mat that is comfortable to sit on in the tub for a bath.... a sturdy bath chair if she takes a shower. Some times an elder becomes claustrophobic in a shower stall, so keep the slider doors a bit open or the shower curtain.

My mom will only agree to a shower once a week, at night. I gather her pj's, and underwear and have he sit on the toilet (with the lid down) so she can get her day clothes off and then I let her test the shower water to make sure that it's not too hot or cold for her. There are grab bars in the shower, but I still leave the shower curtain open a bit, so I can help her wash her back and shampoo her hair. She has no problem with shyness. I will say that I had to convince her that she needed to shower & it took a long time for me to do that. I basically told her that someone might come to visit & that she would want to be clean. Oh, the fights we had! Then one day, out of the blue, she told me that she'd take a shower if I blew dry her hair, so she wouldn't have to go to bed with wet hair.