My Dad has 100% VA disability due to severe asbestosis, my Mom though not disabled, won't do much. Both of them sit around in pajamas all day long and are depressed, and yes, they are both on depression and/or anxiety meds - not helping much. I helped (did all of the paperwork, phone calls and related emails) and my Dad get his VA disability, a ramp and a walk in shower. (He hates the ramp and now hates the shower but at first wanted both. I am at my wits end.) I pick up their commodity boxes and take them to his medical appointments. I manage his meds, ordering and checking on refills for him. I, as well as my daughter, fill water jugs from my well for them. My daughter cooks, cleans and runs shopping errands for them. Neither one of them will keep an appointment with a lawyer to do their wills or POA. Every time an appointment is made , they cancel it. I just went through a run of 24/7 caregiving with my MIL who had severe dementia and passed last March. We had POA for her and it was hard enough to negotiate all of her caregiving needs with that; I cannot even imagine what I have in store for me if my parents are unwilling to do the necessary paperwork to help them when they are unable to help themselves. My sister lives here but is very self involved, she won't even fill water jugs for them and my brother lives in the southern states and cannot help. It seems to be falling on me and my daughter, at least the caregiving parts. The sad thing is that my Mom won't even make a meal, so if my daughter doesn't, it doesn't get done. Myself and my daughter are afraid that if no one gets meals for them they will both get malnutrition. My Mom gravitates to cupcakes, bread & molasses and other sweet things but not food with nutrition and my Dad does the same with cookies, candy & ice cream. It's like having toddlers again only grown up versions that are your parents and get mad at you for pointing out that they need to prepare and eat meals, not sweets bought at the store.... My Dad is obsessed with money - how much he has, what it is spent on, etc., and gets very ugly tempered about it. He also has panic attacks about attending any appointment or just leaving the house. My mother sits around all day and watches tv and reads. Did I mention that they both live in their pajamas 24/7? Their behavior both frustrates and angers me at times. He will be 80 and she will be 77 in July. They supposedly do not have dementia. What can I do?