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My relative's wife was added to my aunt's bank account as joint owner. New checks were ordered and no updates were made to change it from a long ago address or add the new name. My aunt was deemed incompetent some time ago. Family conflict is something I want to avoid, but I am not getting any cooperation or information as to why this was done and I am the poa. The amount that was withdrawn is not worth a fight in court, but what more can I do?

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My advice is to go to an Elder Law Attorney with this entire story. Two power of attorney is ALWAYS a mess, even when both are getting along. Resign as POA. Let go of this and walk away. Your Aunt is using your Cousin's wife (I assume, her son's wife?) for her account. She should use her as her POA as well. All this messing with the Aunt's account is going to be a muddy mess. If your Aunt did this, putting the Cousin's wife on the account, then she apparently has capacity to do so? Or bank considered that she did, and how they did that when you are POA on the account I can't even BEGIN to imagine.
Go to her Lawyer NOW, resign your POA, and walk away. Make what you do for your aunt going forward only lovely VISITS, and let the rest work out however it does.
My advice is not to walk away, but to RUN AWAY from this mess. There is someone there who is eager to have this mess; give it to her. Because it is going to be a horrific mess, otherwise. And it will drive you so nuts that you will need your OWN POA and care moving forward.
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Pasa18 Sep 2019
Yes. I know. I feel strongly about the principle but readily admit I may not have the capacity with aunt.
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"New checks were ordered without a change in the name or address. The address on the checks was a long ago prior address." This is fraud. Cousin's wife is healthcare, not financial, agent. You still have the fiduciary obligation to your aunt. Accordingly, you can go to the bank, speak with the branch manager, and undo this immediately.

Why does your aunt still have an insurance policy? What is the policy for? I found the following from the website of California Advocates for Nursing Home Reform:
"The cash value of life insurance is usually a countable asset under Medi-Cal. There are two exceptions. The first is for small amounts of insurance. An applicant can exempt the cash value of insurance if the cumulative value of the death benefit of all policies is equal to or less than $1,500. Of course, it is unusual for an individual who owns insurance to own such a small amount of coverage. Apparently the exclusion is to allow the funding of burial costs with insurance.
If the cumulative value exceeds $1,500, then the insurance is counted and there is no exemption, not even for the first $1,500 of coverage.
It is important to note that the face value is used to determine if the insurance is exempt. However, the value of the insurance as a countable asset is the net cash surrender value.
The second exemption is for term insurance policies. Term insurance is insurance that accumulates no cash value. Instead, the premiums pay the actual cost of insurance and do not fund an accumulation account to defer the future cost of coverage.
All other policies owned by the applicant or spouse are countable for eligibility purposes."

"There have been several ATM withdrawals but totaling less than $1200" At what banks were these withdrawals made? Was your aunt present for them? I would raise holy H-E-L-L with the bank for allowing these cousins to rip off a woman on Medi-Cal. I would threaten to go to the media if the bank did not fix the mess they created by failing to do proper due diligence.

Your aunt is vulnerable. In my opinion, abandoning her now would make you feel worse in the long run.
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Pasa18 Sep 2019
Ok, thank you. I just needed to hear another person with my sentiments to fight this. The withdrawals were made by ATM which is suspect because my aunt has no way of knowing. The life insurance names the cousin as beneficiary. So yes not only are they stealing from aunt, but ultimately in theory stealing from me as my aunt named me in her will. Absolutely I feel horrible that I cannot "fight" by going to court to seek guardianship to revoke the AHCD which I believe is questionable. The adverse effect is hitting home with my mom who is stressed and her health is declining. I am focusing on my mother. The bank investigated and reported it to adult protective services. I reported it to the ombudsman, but heard nothing back. It will be family drama but yes I will feel horrible if my aunt gets a second rate funeral. These cousins I feel will reimburse themselves first from the life insurance as beneficiary and as AHCD decide on a second rate funeral. UGH.
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I agree with AD. I’m sure you don’t need this mess and stress in your life; the confusion, the indecision and the back and forth with everyone involved. It’s not worth it. Consult with an Elder Law Attorney to put an end to your POA so everything is done legally and correctly so if there IS something funny going on with the finances, there is no way it comes back on you.
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Pasa18 Sep 2019
I did speak with an Elder Law Attorney in my area who felt I had a lot of hard fact documents to make a case. However, they recommended attorneys in my aunt's area. That is the hard decision because it will be another huge undertaking I feel.
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I vote with AlvaDeer too. It is very very hard to not step in and help...you feel so guilty that possibly the person is being taken advantage of....but do you really want to deal with all the family drama?  If your mom will need help, i would focus on her.
I am POA for a half cousin with no family other than another cousin who is 91. When cousin was in ICU, the hospital was pressuring the 91 yr old to be POA.. Our cousin had appointed an attorney as POA who had retired and moved and no secondary.  So I agreed so the hosp. would stop badgering the elderly cousin. MISTAKE. I had to get rid of the decrepit house that I had never seen, deal with banks etc.  Would not do it again....and there was no one else muddying the waters. Wish you the best and post how it turns out please!
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