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Has his doctor talked to him and with you about this? Who all is part of teh "We have decided"? If you could get a third party like the doctor to be the heavy in this it would help. Depending on the level of his dementia, assisted living might not take him.

Do you have medical and durable POA for your husband.
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I agree with Crewmagnon. It all starts with your husband's doctor supporting the family in making the assessment and comunicating what needs to be said to the patient, in partnership with the primaruy caregiver being truthful about the fact that in-home care is no longer an option and the reasons why. Good luck!
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Sorry I misspelled your username, Crowemagnum!
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Getting the doctor to help convince the parent to move is a great idea and that is the best possible scenario to have. In our family's case, my parents' doctor was not cooperative and "cared for" my parents in a detached way (My mother refused to give him up because she liked having him because he allowed and "enabled" her to hang onto to bad health habits .) , so it fell to my husband and me to do the hard work of convincing. In the end, it was bad falls that both of my parents experienced that convinced them it was time to move. They said it was a "sign." Dragonchick, I found that God answered my prayer in this matter when I prayed to Him.

If you are anticipating resistance, your intuition is probably correct. I would say to tread carefully, gently, and respectfully. Yet, don't let the subject drop. Let some time go by, and then bring it up again......and again.....Eventually they will realize that you have their best interests at heart and perhaps see something they don't. If a friend of your parent can offer support, that is a big help. When my parents found out about some good friends already in the facility, that made it much more appealing.
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