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Your profile states:

"Want to care for someone in my home what do I need to be legall she.s only a friend"

and that you are in upstate NY.

Before you worry about legality, you need to understand how intense and complicated in-home hands-on caregiving can be, especially if you're not a relative or PoA.

How old is your friend?
How old are you?
What medical or cognitive/memory issues does this friend currently have?
Do you have any physical issues that would prevent you from assisting, transferring or lifting your friend?
Does your friend have an assigned PoA? (Or family that you should first contact to alert them to this friend's need)
Is your spare bedroom on the main floor?
Does your friend have mobility issues or has ever fallen in their current residence?
Do you have at least 1 bathroom on a main floor that can fit a walker and/or transfer wheelchair through the door and to the toilet & shower?
Do you have a walk-in shower with little or no clearance (so, no tub to step over for access)?
Is your garage/car accessible without going up or down any stairs?
What happens if your friend runs out of money to pay for their care (which is a very common problem)?

There are more questions to consider but even if your friend is in "good shape" now, and depending on their age, this person may be only one medical event, one accident or one dementia diagnosis away from this arrangement becoming a completely different experience than what you or the friend bargained for.

You will need insurance to cover any incident that happens in your home, your fault or not. You should definitely have a written/signed employment agreement with your friend which would protect the both of you.

If your friend develops dementia and can no longer manage their financial affairs and you are not their PoA and no one is, how will you get paid? If someone lives in your house the only way to get them out if they resist is through an eviction process via the legal system -- even with a signed lease.

You can certainly move ahead with this plan but should go into it with your eyes wide open for your own protection. Please read other posts on this forum regarding the rigors of caregiving, burnout and what happens when people run out of money, etc.
Helpful Answer (5)
BrendaJayi Sep 2021
Absolutely - what she said.
Don't do it. Your friend is asking for too much.
Helpful Answer (1)

Geaton has some good questions. Caring for anyone is hard. You give up your life for them. If this friend has Dementia, I would not even think of caring for them. Dementia is too unpredictable. Has no rhyme or reason to it. Its like caring for a toddler. They have to be watched all the time. And physically are you capable? Just giving my Mom a shower I had to sit down for a half hour. I hated toileting. I prayed each day that she wouldn't do a #2.

Are you going to be paid? Think very hard before you bring someone into your home because it is hard to get them out. And if ur being promised help...that will not last long if you get it at all.
Helpful Answer (5)

Anyone can offer assistance to a friend and not be breaking a law. Where the legality enters in is if money or property change hands or a third party decides the friend is vulnerable to abuse in your care or estranged family appear and decide no good deed goes unpunished. There are so many unexpected things that can go wrong with the friend and also with yourself or your family. It may all go well for awhile and then become overwhelming.
When your friend passes or is incapacitated, it might be difficult to extricate yourself or have legal standing without proper documentation and you may not be able to manage on your own. So it is good you are asking these questions.

You might want to research services available for you and your friend through the local area agency on aging.
Here is a link to help you find them. Ask to speak with a social worker or case manager. They can help you figure out if this is the right move for the two of you.
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Please consult a local lawyer that specializes in elder law. She/He can best advise you about what you need for this situation.
Helpful Answer (2)

It is legal for you to let anyone you want live in your home.

Caregiving can be arduous and expensive.. Are you prepared, if illness causes deterioration, to change someone's diapers, bath them, brush their teeth, feed them, handle their medications, manage their finances and keep them entertained?

if so, suggest you get a legal and medical revokable Power of Attorney (POA) from your friend. You will need this to be able to talk to doctors, home health agencies, gov agencies, insurance, pension, banks, etc. Very, very hard to help someone if you can not talk to these folks on their behalf.

Revokable means your friend can take back control.

If your friend has any family, a POA will help prevent clashes. It is maddening to try and take care of someone if another person has financial and medical POA. The one who does the caregiving work and is around person 24/7 should be able to make decisions in accordance with patient wishes.
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