Do others want their aging parent to die?

If you believe in God and Heaven, and you believe their friends and loved ones wait for them there, why hold them back? We grieve for our own loss, but we wish them release from the bondage of old age. We hope Jesus comes for them tonight. There is no "guilt" attached to wishing for that. There is hope for something better, for them, not for us. Our misgivings come from being left behind, our loss of companionship on a long trek along a hidden path. Good or bad, we are accustomed to our co-pilots. We have them to lose, but they have everything to gain by going.

Yes, wanting an elderly parent to die is normal. We want them to be released from a miserable existence with no quality of life, we need a break from caring for them around the clock. We want their physical pain to stop. There are many reasons. Please don't beat yourself up for feeling the way you do.

Well said Pam!

I hate to say this, but yes, I wish my 84-year-old mother-in-law would pass away. As of today she has wasted away down to 71 pounds. It is painful and excruciating to see her like this. I can't imagine what it feels like to be in her skin right now. I'm praying for her misery to end soon. I also pray that my husband and I will never experience what she is going through. Appreciate every day, folks.

On the bad days I wonder why life has gotten to be so long and painful. I watched my father wither away to nothing, sitting in a chair all day long waiting for God. Now I see my mother doing the same thing. Her eyes are so tired. There is not a spark of life left in them, only misery. But still her body keeps going. For myself, I see my life ticking away and wonder how I keep holding my head up, living with this type of misery. All I can think is that this isn't right, but the only thing there is to do is wait. What I really wish is that my mother could feel better until it was time for her to leave the earth. As it is now, I just wonder why life continues when there is nothing but feeling bad.

"My chains are gone. I've been set free" Dad is so depressed that he cannot walk. So horrified at his age in body. So bored with life now. All alone his children grown. His sister died 5 years previously and they were close. Yes. I want Dad to be free

i lived with my mother as dementia took her life and im watching dementia and decline take my 90 yr old aunt -- but , until my mom felt herself dying she still enjoyed playing inside of her quite genius mind , a bowl of cooked apples will bring a pretty smile from my aunt and today i took her two gold dollars that i picked up at the bank for her . the elders might seem quite miserable by our observations but there may well be things that bring them a lot of happiness . ive always thought that id never want to play out a terminal illness but stick a morphine drip in my wrist and it might be a different story altogether ..
my mother enjoyed delicious homemade food in her final months , my aunt just enjoys loving visitors . your elders are not going to go until theyve resolved some things in their minds not the least of which -- are their kids gonna be allright ..

Well said Captain. Often the dying are worried about those left behind, as if their work was unfinished. Maybe it is ours to finish, ours to carry on.

im certainly carrying on moms work of " we aint gonna pay it and let em keep it " .. shes right you know ? i was too chintzy to buy a water misting bottle for the cherry trees im trying to propagate . bush hogging a clover field yesterday , looked down in the dirt and by dam theres a misting bottle spray nozzle , minus the bottle ..

Cancer deaths are about 25% of the population starting at age 65. 10 years after that around 75 years of age comes heart failures and lung related deaths. That is 20%. 15% of people in United States die from accidents. That leaves the remainer of people 85 past 100 and over (not unheard of today of living past 100) of 45% of the population to become old and suffer until they die without any hope of ever enjoying another day for the rest of their life. This is the going to be the norm especially with the aging of the baby boomers and medical procedures keeping people who should of died alive way past their prime. So I do not believe that it is wrong to end suffering of an elder who really will never feel well again.