Hi Everyone. I have been part of this group ever since I moved in with my Dad six years ago. It has been probably been the longest, toughest, six years of my life. I wanted to update you all and ask some questions. My father has Dementia. At this point he gets confused easily especially with what day it is also the time of day. If he wakes up from a nap, he insists that it is the next day or that no one came to assist him that day. Now we have received some new information...we have learned that he has a mass in his stomach that is malignant. We have a meeting with the hospital next Tuesday to discuss next steps since they feel he will not survive any treatment related to the tumor.
My children and I live with my father and it has already been decided that we will continue to live there. My concern is that my siblings may feel that since I am living there, they will just send Dad home to live out the rest of his time which could be many years. He is not eating much of anything and I'm not sure how long he will last without eating more than broth and applesauce each day. We have a home health aide that I have discussed here many times. I do not want her to have free reign of our home especially if Dad is not in a position to move around much. My sister mentioned hospice to the doctor when he mentioned the tumor but the doctor scoffed at it, saying he could live 6 months or more. What can we expect from this meeting and should I suggest a nursing home or assisted living ?
Most people will tell you that the wish they had called in hospice sooner, it is not just for the last days and weeks, I have read of some people who actually improved somewhat with the extra care and attention. Please do consider employing a hospice service, they can be helpful no matter where your father lives.