I am so unfamiliar with this end of life stage.

When someone is nearing the end of life, there are no rules. Whatever he likes and whatever makes him more comfortable is the best thing. There isn't much quality of life left, so something he enjoys is a big plus. I wouldn't worry about any rules for health, since they are made to help make health in the future better.

We rarely think about how hard it is for the spirit and the body to separate. It has to happen on its own time. It is very hard to watch, but the spirit will leave when it is ready to separate. Until then, all you can do is love him and provide whatever it is that brings a bit of enjoyment or comfort. ((((Hugs))))

Yes. A little of anything he fancies, under careful supervision to make sure he's able to swallow without choking or aspirating, will do your father's morale good. I'm sorry, this must be so hard on you and your sister. Wishing you all the best with making your father comfortable.

I would suggest that you confer with your Hospice Nurse, but if it were me, and this was my Dad, things like Popsicles, yogurts, puddings, and things that he likes but mostly thickened, I would offer, in moderation and as tolerated. You didn't mention what he is diagnosed with, but whatever makes him happy, I say go for it! Another thing he might like is light body massage, his arms and legs, his back, especially after a gentle wash would probably make him feel good. Pick a nice body cream or butter, my Mom loved that! My Dad was unable to shave himself due to two torn rotator cuffs, he was unable to lift his arms up, and he loved a good shave several times a week, with shaving cream, he enjoyed being pampered by his daughters, so things like that, that you can bond over are great, again, if he is up for it. I'm so sorry this is happening for you and your family! If he is lucid and awake for portions of his day, you might also think of notifying friends and family, and ask them to send him notes and cards, to read to him to cheer him up, my Mom couldn't believe how many people wrote to her, and told her how much they thought of her, and how much she influenced her life in a positive way. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during these difficult days!

I'm sorry you're going through this with your dad. I know how difficult it is. Rarely are we ever prepared for our parent's end of life and I've never known anyone who's gone through it for the first time who knew exactly what to do and when to do it. That's part of what makes things so stressful on us, the adult children.

Because you care and because you're being mindful I don't think you're going to harm your dad in any way. Things like yogurt pops and popsicles are probably soothing to him. They moisten his mouth and put a little something in his belly. I would continue with things like that.

I think you're doing fine.

sigh... my dad was like this (he passed in june)
He was 92 and was drinking but not eating even on the morning he passed.
The symptom I saw and no one else did was he became "listless" and more "in his head" like he was concentrating on something with his eyes closed.
He still acknowledged me there, but was focused 'inside'.
Sure let him have whatever he wants till he doesnt want it :) he is going down the natural path ((hug))

reading what Jessie said and the way my dad was, it was like a woman in beginnings of labor.... when you are restless and concentrating....

8/23/2016. 8:30 a.m. PDT. Tuesday.