Should I try to mend fences with my "absent" brother?

Wow I can totally relate to your post. I have been overseeing the care of my mother in the hospital and rehab for the last month after moving her into our house in October. She cracked her ribs which made her move a little faster than we had anticipated. In two days we had to make her comfortable in our house with as much of her stuff as we could.
After a few weeks, she developed pneumonia and almost died! Fortunately quick intervention, good treatment , strong will, and the grace of God made her well enough that she is getting stronger in rehab. During this time, I was at the hospital most of the day making sure my almost 90 year old mother know that I wanted her to fight and stay with us, that I cared about her and needed her, that I had waited a long time to have her move in and spend lots of quality time together. I was so scared and grieving the possible loss of my best friend. I was watching her give up one day and struggle the next. I had to be strong for her and make sure all the medical staff knew that I was checking on her and her care every day. I was doing all this by myself with my husband supporting me from home and sending daily reports by text to my 3 brothers and two stepbrothers and a gaggle of grandchildren through Facebook Messenger. One of my brothers and my two steps commented or answered my texts with questions and thanked me for my effort. After 3 days two of my brothers did not answer any texts or phone messages in which I expressed my concern that they were not getting messages. After no response I got very upset and frustrated and talked to my supportive brother and asked him to contact my other brothers and telling them they were assholes. I was so hurt! Well that got a reaction. My brothers ages 61 and 65 said "I'm rubber, you're glue..... Nanny nanny boo boo".
The next day, my 61 year old brother said he didn't appreciate me calling him an asshole and it wasn't a very Christian thing to do. I responded that he could use common courtesy in this situation an show some support when I am taking all the stress upon myself taking care of our mother and as far as being a Christian he knows nothing about it because most of us will readily admit that we are far from perfect and never claim to be. I have seen other families fall apart under the stress of a parents illness but I have been trying so hard to keep everyone in the loop and involved. It was Christmas. We were miserable because she was apologizing to my husband and I for ruining our Christmas. I was feeling powerless and so responsible to my family and this is what I had to deal with. Fortunately, I prayed and prayed and asked others to pray and she is recuperating nicely, but I will never look at my brothers the same again.

Sharadale, it's time to learn and remember each of your siblings and where they stand in terms of your mother's health issues. You now know which ones to send messages from the beginning of your mom's new health issues - who wants to know the blow-by-blow news ... and the ones who just don't care for the daily details. Not everyone is gungho about the parents - like you are. All they want is - what's she going through, is it a major health issue or not. By learning this - you won't be so hurt and angry if your brothers don't react the way you expected them to. Trust me - I KNOW. I have 7 siblings. It's best to accept that not everyone will view your mother like you do. It's like you said - you will never look at your brothers the same again.

Bookluvr, you are absolutely right! Sad but true! Although she was always there for them, to work with them at the dining room table on their projects or math, to help them out with financial trouble, to brag on their strengths and accomplishments, to be the best mother she could be despite the crappy hand she was dealt, she worked 6 days a week for them. Yes that is her job because she is a mom, but in my lifetime I have seen plenty of crappy moms. They tend to be the rule rather than the exception. A little care and concern in her direction is not to much to ask, is it? I am also the executrix of the estate and they will be none to pleased when the estate is not split equally and the lion's share will go to me. I am not happy about it because I know I will hear crap about how I have always been spoiled but that is just a load of bs. I moved over 30 years ago to be closer to her. I have a better relationship with her because I wanted it not because she picked favorites. I have done everything because I love her so much and am grateful for her love and the role model she was for me. As the executrix, I can divide it as I like. Will I go against her wishes and split it equally, NO! I will stay by her side and comfort her and take care of her and enjoy her laughter until God decides to take her and I will never feel guilt. They may realize after she is gone what a jewel they let slip through their fingers, but I doubt it.