My fiancé and I moved literally across the country to take care of his father after his wife passed away. We talked to him weekly on the phone prior to moving and he would tell us "I can barely walk", "I can't get to the store", "Nobody ever checks on me" etc and begged us to move here to take care of him. My fiancé felt terrible and we both quit good jobs and gave up everything to move to help him. When we arrived he was walking just fine, and all the relatives who live close told us they called him all the time and saw him in church and he always told them he was doing just fine and didn't need help. We were both devastated after turning our own lives upside down to move here and he didn't really "need" anything he was just not used to being alone. His wife did all the housework, chores, shopping and cooking. He has had controlled diabetes for 40 years and has no other health issues. For the last two years he has been verbally abusive to both of us. My fiancé says that's the way he has always been and blows off these tantrums. The verbal abuse is out of control and quite embarrassing because he seems to enjoy doing it in public more than anywhere. Our 5 year relationship is about to end because I just can't do this anymore. He uses guilt trips on my fiancé on a daily basis to get what he wants. We have caught him multiple times telling his friends that he supports us financially which is completely false. He doesn't pay for anything except the candy he sneaks at the store. If he doesn't like what we are having for dinner, he will call one of the relatives and tell them we didn't make him dinner. He refused to get any exercise and sits at his computer literally all day long playing solitaire or watching tv. He only leaves the house to go to church. If he needs something he will guilt trip us by saying things like "I worked for 40 years, I am done, you are supposed to take care of me now," even though there is no reason other than laziness as to why he can't do anything for himself. My fiancé caters to him because he feels like its his duty and falls right into the guilt trips. I have not gone upstairs in 2 days now after an argument about needing to get milk from the store. I have had the flu for 2 days and he got mad because I didn't want to go to the store to get the milk and asked him to do it. He threw a fit and I just can't deal with him. He is perfectly content that I am in the basement because he can't guilt trip me like he does to his son and now he doesn't have to deal with me. I have been crying for 2 days on top of being sick because I really love my fiancé but I can no longer "take care" of an abusive person who there is nothing wrong with other than laziness. I started packing today with the intention of moving out and leaving my fiancé but it hurts my heart and I don't know what to do.