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Got mom into AL but she's struggling with schedules and routines. I would like to get some organizational tools to help with this. Have any of you found ways to help your loved one stay organized? Day planners, wall systems etc? Hate to reinvent the wheel if I don't have to. Thanks

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The key to managing memory issues and dementia is to simplify everything......to shrink her world rather than expand it with schedules or day planners. What makes sense to us is totally senseless to them. The dry erase white board is something to try, like screennamed said, but your mom would have to remember to look at it. When mom was in the ALF, they'd hand out the monthly calendar which listed all the activities and events in one easy to read place. Mom insisted on putting it in the drawer and then she'd forget where it was, so she had no idea what was going on. Every time I would go over, I would pull the calendar out of the drawer and put it out in plain sight. She would then put it back in the drawer the minute I left the room. Since they lose the concept of time, it becomes nearly impossible to keep them on a schedule or in a routine. Mom has 2 clocks in her place but never has a clue about what time it is, or, if its 6 pm, what that time may mean with respect to an event. THIS is what makes things very difficult.....or ONE of the things, anyway. The best thing the ALF can do is come get your mom for meals or to let her know of an activity or PT session, etc. If the dementia progresses beyond the scope of what the ALF can manage, you may need to look into memory care. My mom lived in the ALF sector for 4 years and then had to go to the memory care sector after a recent hospitalization and step down in dementia.

Best of luck.....its a tough road, that's for sure
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I’m not sure how far along in this journey your mom is, but when my husband was in earlier stages, I would write him a note every day with his schedule and he would check off as he did something. This tracking may be beyond your mom at this point.
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Judysai422 Jul 2019
I made up the same thing for my mom and hung it on her Walker. We did it on the computer so it was easy to update. However, my dad took it over and then failed to keep it up. I think after a while she became immune to it.
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Good comments below. But introducing new things or methods won't be adopted. Are you trying to help her keep on top of her meds? I would pay the extra and have the facility do this, if the meds are important. Other than that, you calling to remind her might be the best, but there's no guarantee that she'll do it after you hang up. That was my experience with my MIL.
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What ur asking is really impossible when it comes to Dementia. At Moms, the aides and activity director were responsible for reminding Mom "it was time". But Mom was in a 39 bed AL. She needed help with dressing. So the aide got her up, washed and dressed and out to the common area for breakfast. The aide is responsible for getting them out for meals. The activity director knocked on doors and let residents know it was time for whatever activity she had going.

I always felt the calendars were more for family to show them what was going on so they could be there if they wanted.
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Judysai422 Jul 2019
Wow, where my parents live in AL, the service is not nearly that good. Activity director showed up once, and only after I spoke to head of the place multiple times. But then, their place has 99 residents,
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A dementia clock is wonderful. It shows the month, day, and time of day and even has an alarm for taking meds, etc, up to 8 times a day. These alarms can be used for meds, appointments, etc. Calendars become so very difficult and confusing. Alarms may be confusing, but they can be turned off and then look for other options. We made a little schedule for meds, that matched the time on the clock, example, morning, afternoon, evening, then my mother would check the time of day she took her pills. We numbered the pill bottle tops with the same number on the bottle, and wrote the numbers in red so that the bottles and the tops matched the number on the schedule so all important information for her was just a number. This helped for quite a long time so she took her pills at the correct time of the day and made her more independent. Again a dementia clock is great.
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My MIL with dementia has two calendars, a clock, a watch and a whiteboard. Problem is: she can't process the fact she needs to look at them. We now accept the fact we can't change this and let the professionals remind her "time for lunch, bath, bingo, etc." I gently say don't fret over this because it's not likely to improve. Save your time, energy and emotion for other areas that may occur: UTI's, meds, etc. Warm fuzzies to you.
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Whiteboard similar to the methodology utilized by hospitals and nursing homes. Which is hung on a wall with a daily schedule. Struggling with schedules, equates to struggling with AL facility mealtimes. Which means she's needing more help, than AL can provide? Whatever she is accustomed to doing, would work best. Align it to the protocols utilized by the long-term or memory care facility that is her next destination.

Are there more specifics? What is she forgetting?
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Thanks all. First of all I live 500 miles away so will be leaving to go back home soon. Neuropsychological testing this coming week so should have formal dx soon. For now I want to try keeping her independent as much as possible. Daily reminders such as feeding the dog and watering her plant etc. I got her a dementia clock and she is using it. She still understands the concept of time. Printed up her phone contacts to put next to her phone. She still remembers to IM me through Facebook. Its really hard to know what she's capable at this point so I at least want to try. I cant imagine giving up before I've even started. Had to placed her in AL due to extreme danger in the home with an older addict sibling as well as her MCI and recent hip replacement so she's been through a lot of trauma lately. AL is accompanying for meals but she's resistant. I think the AL is still assessing her needs and trying to keep her independent in the mean time. We will reassess at the end of the month.
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I pressed send too early. We found a place that accepted Medicaid after several months of private pay. Many of them wanted private pay for at least a year or two.

Memory care costs $10,000 a month.

The Council on Aging social workers and the gerontologist that we found really helped us find a place where we could place my mother that is close to us and that has caring staff. I think from what you say, your mom will be needing that kind of care soon.
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A very large clock next to a very good size wall board may help, but if she is quite far advanced then she will soon enough need memory care. As to finding out how advanced she is you can ask her to draw you a clock. If she is able to do that ask her to draw it showing 10:00 or any other time. If she cannot do these tasks then a clock and wall board are unlikely to help. Are the staff expressing that these things are becoming problematic now?
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JoAnn29 Jul 2019
My Mom could not read a regular clock. My daughter got her a digital with 2 in numbers and even then, it was iffy.
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