The system is so broken and I'm clueless about how to help my parents?
Since March I've been dealing with my parents numerous medical crises. My mom is 60 and my dad 64. My mom has been in and out of nursing homes since March, she's smuggled alcohol into her current nursing home, she's left one nursing home AMA. She's incredibly hard to care for, very manipulative, and nothing has cured her alcoholism. My dad is pleasantly compliant but to the point that he'll do what anyone says even if it's some crazy idea of my mom's. My dad has Werneikes syndrome from drinking, and we decided that he might be okay with home health after stints in several nursing homes and assisted livings but he got back to drinking. The ONLY option I can see at this point is alcohol treatment for both, but the odds of it working are so small. The only thing that keeps them in line temporarily is me threatening to drop out of school and quitting my amazing job. Im only 21, and my parents worked so hard to give me a free college education. It was their life dream to see me successful, and I use that leverage to make them snap out of it. I know it's not ethical but I can't see devoting the next decade or more of my life to helping people who don't want to be helped. My dad has no family, and my mom's family gave up. I work with an advocacy group that helps me and my one helpful aunt with all the logistics of their care, but they are too overwhelmed and no longer wish to help my mom. If all else fails, I will have to let my parents alcoholism run its course. I can't keep living in this chaos. It got so bad over the summer, I didn't care if I woke up in the morning. I'm so tired, and the system in South Dakota is so broken. Is anyone in my situation? What did you do to help? I've exhausted all my resources. You name it - I've contacted them. I don't believe kids owe their parents care. I would never wish this on my children. I'd never wish my life or my parents' lives on even my worst enemy.
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Congratulations on your motivation and successes, despite dealing with so much turmoil. I say keep working towards your goal and try to avoid allowing them to disrupt your life. I'm sure you are aware of the long term effects of alcoholism. It's very scary, but, really there isn't much you can do if they are not inclined to accept help.
Do you have a good support system for yourself? I'd work on that and building your life with those who you can rely on and build a future with. With the love your parents have for you, they certainly want the best for you. I would hope their illnesses don't ruin it.
Go it alone, keep your job.
Move out.
They are hurting you beyond repair, imo.
It is okay to go,
go live your life!
Life is for the living, imo.
You will still need support through Al-Anon, imo.